Now I could see the door in front of me. The doorknob was just to my left. I kept swinging my shirt, and suddenly the cloud seemed to clear entirely away, almost as if it was moving out of range of my disruption. In that instant I slipped through the door and slammed it shut behind me. I blinked in sudden darkness. I could hardly see. I thought my eyes would adjust from the glare of sunlight, and I waited a moment, but my vision did not improve. Instead, it seemed to be getting worse. I could just make out the glass doors of the airlock directly ahead. I still felt the stinging pinpricks all over my skin. My throat was dry and my breathing was raspy. I coughed. My vision was dimming. I started to feel dizzy.
On the other side of the airlock, Ricky and Mae stood watching me. I heard Ricky shout, "Come on, Jack! Hurry!"
My eyes burned painfully. My dizziness grew rapidly worse. I leaned against the wall to keep from falling over. My throat felt thick. I was having difficulty breathing. Gasping, I waited for the glass doors to open, but they remained closed. I stared stupidly at the airlock. "You have to stand in front of the doors! Stand!"
I felt like the world was in slow motion. All my strength was gone. My body felt weak and shaky. The stinging was worse. The room was getting darker. I didn't think I could stand up on my own.
"Stand! Jack!"
Somehow, I shoved away from the wall, and lurched toward the airlock. With a hiss, the glass doors slid open.
"Go, Jack! Now!"
I saw spots before my eyes. I was dizzy, and sick to my stomach. I stumbled into the airlock, banging against the glass as I stepped inside. With every second that passed it was harder to breathe. I knew I was suffocating.
Outside the building, I heard the low thrumming sound start up again. I turned slowly to look back.
The glass doors hissed shut.
I looked down at my body but could barely see it. My skin appeared black. I was covered in dust. My body ached. My shirt was black with dust, too. The spray stung me, and I closed my eyes. Then the air handlers started up, whooshing loudly. I saw the dust sucked off my shirt. My vision was clearer, but I still couldn't breathe. The shirt slipped from my hand, flattening against the grate at my feet. I bent to reach down for it. My body began to shake, tremble. I heard only the roar of the handlers.
I felt a wave of nausea. My knees buckled. I sagged against the wall. I looked at Mae and Ricky through the second glass doors; they seemed far away. As I watched, they receded even farther, moving away into the distance. Soon they were too far away for me to worry any longer. I knew I was dying. As I closed my eyes, I fell to the ground, and the roar of the air handlers faded into cold and total silence.
DAY 6
11:12 A.M.
"Don't move."
Something icy-cold coursed through my veins. I shuddered.
"Jack. Don't move. Just for a second, okay?"
Something cold, a cold liquid running up my arm. I opened my eyes. The light was directly overhead, glaring, greenish-bright; I winced. My whole body ached. I felt like I'd been beaten. I was lying on my back on the black counter of Mae's biology lab. Squinting in the glare, I saw Mae standing beside me, bent over my left arm. She had an intravenous line in my elbow. "What's going on?"
"Jack, please. Don't move. I've only done this on lab animals."
"That's reassuring." I lifted my head to see what she was doing. My temples throbbed. I groaned, and lay back.
Mae said, "Feel bad?"
"Terrible."
"I'll bet. I had to inject you three times."
"With what?"
"You were in anaphylactic shock, Jack. You had a severe allergic reaction. Your throat almost closed up."
"Allergic reaction," I said. "That's what it was?"
"Severe one."
"It was from the swarm?"
She hesitated for a moment, then: "Of course."
"Would nano-sized particles cause an allergic reaction like that?"
"They certainly could…"
I said, "But you don't think so."
"No, I don't. I think the nanoparticles are antigenically inert. I think you reacted to a coliform toxin."
"A coliform toxin…" My throbbing headache came in waves. I took a breath, let it out slowly. I tried to figure out what she was saying. My mind was slow; my head hurt. A coliform toxin.
"Right."
"A toxin from E. coli bacteria? Is that what you mean?"
"Right. Proteolytic toxin, probably."
"And where would a toxin like that come from?"
"From the swarm," she said.
That made no sense at all. According to Ricky the E. coli bacteria were only used to manufacture precursor molecules. "But bacteria wouldn't be present in the swarm itself," I said. "I don't know, Jack. I think they could be."
Why was she so diffident? I wondered. It wasn't like her. Ordinarily, Mae was precise, sharp. "Well," I said, "somebody knows. The swarm's been designed. Bacteria's either been designed in, or not."
I heard her sigh, as if I just wasn't getting it.
But what wasn't I getting?
I said, "Did you salvage the particles that were blown off in the airlock? Did you keep the stuff from the airlock?"
"No. All the airlock particles were incinerated."
"Was that a smart-"
"It's built into the system, Jack. As a safety feature. We can't override it."
"Okay." Now it was my turn to sigh. So we didn't have any examples of swarm agents to study. I started to sit up, but she put a gentle hand on my chest, restraining me. "Take it slowly, Jack."
She was right, because sitting up made my headache much worse. I swung my feet over the side of the table. "How long was I out?"
"Twelve minutes."
"I feel like I was beaten up." My ribs ached with every breath.
"You had a lot of trouble breathing."
"I still do." I reached for a Kleenex and blew my nose. A lot of black stuff came out, mixed with blood and dust from the desert. I had to blow my nose four or five times to clear it. I crumpled the Kleenex and started to throw it away. Mae held out her hand. "I'll take that."
"No, it's okay-"
"Give it to me, Jack."
She took the Kleenex and slipped it into a little plastic bag and sealed it. That was when I realized how stupidly my mind was working. Of course that Kleenex would contain exactly the particles I wanted to study. I closed my eyes, breathed deeply, and waited for the throbbing in my head to ease up a little. When I opened my eyes again the glare in the room was less bright. It almost looked normal.
"By the way," Mae said, "Julia just called. She said you can't call her back, something about some tests. But she wanted to talk to you."
"Uh-huh."
I watched Mae take the Kleenex bag and put it inside a sealed jar. She screwed down the lid tightly. "Mae," I said, "if there's E. coli in the swarm, we can find out by looking at that right now. Shouldn't we do that?"
"I can't right now. I will as soon as I can. I'm having a little trouble with one of the fermentation units, and I need the microscopes for that."
"What kind of trouble?"
"I'm not sure yet. But yields are falling in one tank." She shook her head. "It's probably nothing serious. These things happen all the time. This whole manufacturing process is incredibly delicate, Jack. Keeping it going is like juggling a hundred balls at once. I have my hands full." I nodded. But I was starting to think that the real reason she wasn't looking at the Kleenex was that she already knew the swarm contained bacteria. She just didn't think it was her place to tell me that. And if that's what was going on, then she never would tell me. "Mae," I said. "Somebody has to tell me what's going on here. Not Ricky. I want somebody to really tell me."