"No one can help me."
"I cannot know if I can help you or not until you explain your circumstances."
"If you knew… you would turn your back on me and run," Victoria predicted.
"I doubt that," Taylor replied. "Please trust me enough to tell me what's wrong."
Victoria buried her face in her hands and began sobbing again. Taylor couldn't stand to witness her pain a moment longer. She rushed forward until she stood directly in front of her and then put her hand out.
"All you have to do is take hold, Victoria. I'll do the rest."
Victoria stared up at Taylor a long while, trying to make up her mind. And then, just when Taylor became convinced her offer of friendship was going to be rejected, Victoria surprised her. She slowly, timidly reached up to take hold of her hand.
Taylor assisted her to her feet, then put her arm around Victoria's shoulders with the thought of leading her away from the railing. She wanted to put as much distance between the ocean and the distraught woman as possible, an unrealistic feat, given the fact that they were surrounded on all sides by water.
Victoria was so desperate for a touch of human kindness and a tender, nonaccusatory word of comfort, she literally threw herself into Taylor's arms, very nearly knocking the two of them over. Taylor quickly recovered her balance. Victoria was weeping uncontrollably against her shoulder. She was an inch or two taller than Taylor, and consoling the woman proved to be a little awkward, though certainly not impossible. Taylor patted her in what she hoped was a soothing motion. She didn't try to do anything more to calm her. Victoria obviously needed to cry. In Taylor's mind, weeping could very well be the first step toward healing. Marian never cried, and Taylor thought that perhaps that was one of the many reasons she'd become such a brittle, hard woman.
It didn't take long for Victoria's sobs to unnerve Taylor. She tried to remain dispassionate, yet found she couldn't remain unaffected by such heartbreaking agony, and within minutes, tears were blurring her own vision.
Victoria was rambling incoherent words and phrases mixed with a good number of quotes from Shakespeare's tragedies, but when she confessed she had trusted the man, had really loved him and believed with all her heart that he would marry her, Taylor thought she finally understood the reason behind her desolation.
She was pregnant.
Taylor got good and mad. "Dear God, is that all?" she cried out. "You're going to have a baby, aren't you? I thought you'd committed some atrocious crime."
"It is atrocious," Victoria wailed.
Taylor let out a loud, unladylike snort. "No," she contradicted. "Murdering the man who lied to you and took advantage of your innocence would be atrocious," she told her. She paused to sigh. "Then again, perhaps that wouldn't have been so atrocious after all."
"My life is over."
Taylor forced herself to get her temper under control. The poor woman had probably had quite enough accusations thrown her way. She tried to think of something positive to say to her. It took her a few minutes to come up with something.
"The life you led is over, yes, but now you'll simply start another one. Come and sit down and compose yourself."
Victoria was limp and drained from weeping. Taylor led her over to a bench set against the wall adjacent to the strolling deck.
Victoria sat down, adjusted her skirts, and then folded her hands together in her lap. Her head was bowed in dejection.
Lucas, glad that the immediate threat was over, moved further into the shadows where he could still watch but wouldn't disturb their privacy.
Taylor was too agitated to sit. She paced back and forth in front of Victoria while she worried the problem over in her mind.
"Do you still love this man?"
"No." Her answer was emphatic.
Taylor nodded. "Good," she announced. "He isn't worth loving," she added. "Do you have relatives who will give you shelter in America?"
"No. I hadn't planned on getting there. I used up all my money to purchase a berth. The only reason I carried along my clothes was because my father threw them out on the pavement."
"Your parents threw you out?" Taylor was appalled.
Victoria nodded. "I cannot blame them. I have been a disappointment."
"I can certainly blame them," Taylor argued. "They are your parents. They should have stood by you. My grandmother would have stood by me."
"If she were alive, my grandmother would have stood by me as well," Victoria said.
"What about the man responsible for your condition? Does he know you're carrying his child?"
"Yes."
"And?" Taylor prodded when she didn't continue.
"He doesn't wish to become involved."
"It's a bit late for that decision, isn't it?"
"He wanted to marry Lady Margaret Kingsworth. She has a large dowry."
Taylor's curiosity was captured. She knew Lady Margaret and wondered who the scoundrel was.
"Who is the man…"
"I will never say his name." She fairly shouted her denial.
Taylor hurried to soothe her. "I won't ever ask you again," she promised. "You're certain you don't still love him?"
"I can't imagine what I ever saw in him now. I should have heeded William's advice, for he wrote, 'Love moderately; long love doth so; too swift arrives as tardy as too slow.'"
Lord, she was quoting Shakespeare again. And crying. Taylor tried to hold onto her patience. It was a most difficult task. "The past is the past, Victoria. You cannot undo what has already been done. You must look to the future now."
"I believed with all my heart he would marry me."
"Many a good hanging prevents a bad marriage," Taylor said, turning Shakespeare's words back on the distraught woman.
Victoria found her first smile. "I do believe I would like to see him hang for his lies to me. Still, I was a willing… participant."
"You were naive and he took full advantage. The man's a snake."
"I was equally responsible for my mistake."
Taylor couldn't help but admire the woman because she took responsibility for her actions. She didn't blame anyone else, not even the pig who seduced her. She was about to tell her she admired her when Victoria asked her who she was.
"What is your name?"
"Taylor."
"Taylor? The Lady Taylor?"
"You've heard of me?"
"Oh, yes, everyone has heard of you, milady."
"Why?" Taylor asked.
"The humiliation… oh, dear, I shouldn't have mentioned such an indelicate topic."
Taylor's shoulders slumped. Did everyone in England know about her disgrace? "It wasn't a humiliation. It was a blessing as far as I'm concerned." Lord, how many times had she said those words while in London? At least a hundred times, she thought.
"Do you still love him?" Victoria asked.
"I never did love him," Taylor admitted. "I realize that now. I married his brother," she added with a nod when Victoria looked so surprised. "I don't love him either," she confessed. "But I will admit I am becoming attracted to him. Still, he is a man and, therefore, probably a scoundrel. Most of them are. My husband is honorable though. I've already noticed that attribute."
"Perhaps you will eventually fall in love with him," Victoria suggested.
What an awful thought, given that Lucas would be leaving her the minute they reached Boston. "Perhaps," she said aloud so that Victoria would believe she'd offered a viable hope.
Taylor went over and sat down next to her new friend. She gently turned the topic around to Victoria's delicate condition.
"You made an important decision tonight."