“.. And your uncle Suhuy-he seems eminently stable, but he reminds me a lot of Dworkin. Might he be sitting on all sorts of internal turmoils and ready to flip out anytime?”
“I hope not,” I said. “He never has.”
“Oh-oh, it's been building, and this is a time of stress.”
“Where are you getting all this pop psychology, anyway?'
“I've been studying the great psychologists of the Shadow Earth. It's part of my ongoing attempt to understand the human condition. I realized it was time I learned more about the irrational parts.”
“What brought all this on?”
“The higher order edition of the Pattern I encountered in the Jewel, actually. There were aspects of it I simply could not understand. This led to considerations of chaos theory, then to Menninger and all the others for its manifestations in consciousness.”
“Any conclusions?”
“I am wiser therefor.”
“I mean, concerning the Pattern.”
“Yes. Either it possesses an element of irrationality itself, like living things, or it is an intelligence of such an order that some of its processes only seem irrational to lesser beings. Either explanation amounts to the same thing from a practical standpoint.”
“I never had the opportunity to apply some of the tests I'd designed, but can you say from self-knowledge whether you fall into such a category yourself?”
“Me? Irrational? The notion never occurred to me. I can't see how it could be.”
I finished my tea and swung my legs over the side of the bed.
“Too bad,” I said. “I think some measure of it is what makes us truly human-that, and recognizing it in ourselves, of course.”
“Really?”
I rose and began dressing myself.
“Yes, and controlling it within oneself may have something to do with intelligence and creativity.”
“I'm going to have to study this very closely.” “Do that,” I said, pulling on my boots, “and let me know your findings.”
As I continued dressing, he asked, “When the sky turns blue you will breakfast with your brother Mandor?”
“Yes,” I said.
“And later you will take lunch with your mother?”
“That's right.”
“Later still, you will attend the late monarch's funeral?”
“I will.”
“Will you need me to protect you?”
“I'll be safe with my relatives, Ghost. Even if you don't trust them.”
“The last funeral you attended got bombed.”
“That's true. But it was Luke, and he's sworn off. I'll be okay. You want to sightsee, go ahead.”
“All right,” he said. “I do.”
I rose and crossed the chamber, to stand before the dragon.
“Can you tell me the way to the Logrus?” Ghost asked.
“Are you joking?”
“No,” he stated. “I've seen the Pattern, but I've never seen the place of the Logrus. Where do they keep it?”
“I thought I gave you better memory functions than that. In your last encounter with the thing, you pissed it off in the max.”
“I suppose I did. Do you think it would hold a grudge?”
“Offhand, yes. Upon consideration, yes. Stay away from it.”
“You just advised me to study the chaos factor, the irrational.”
“I didn't advise you to commit suicide. I put a lot of work into you.”
“I value myself, too. And you know I have a survival imperative, the same as organic beings.”
“It's your judgment I wonder about.” “You know a lot about my abilities.”
“It's true you're good at getting the hell out of places.”
“And you owe me a decent education.”
“Let me think about it.”
“That's just stalling. I suppose I can find it myself.”
“Fine. Go ahead.”
“It's that hard to locate?”
“You gave up on omniscience, remember?”
“Dad, I think I need to see it.”
“I haven't the time to take you there.”
“Just show me the way. I'm good at concealing myself.”
“I'll give you that. All right. Suhuy is Keeper of the Logrus. It lies in a cavern-somewhere. The only way I know to it begins in this place.”
“Where?”
“There are something like nine turnings involved. I'll lay a seeing upon you, to lead you.”
“I don't know whether your spells would work on something like me—”
I reached out through the ring-pardon me, spikardsuperimposed a series of black asterisks upon a map of the ways he must follow, hung it in the space of my Logrus vision before him, and I said, “I designed you, and I designed this spell.”
“Uh, yes,” Ghost replied. “I feel as if I suddenly possess data that I can't access.”
“It will be presented to you at the appropriate times. Form yourself into the likeness of a ring upon my left index finger. We will quit this room in a moment and pass through others. When we are near the proper way I will indicate it by pointing. Proceed in that direction and you will pass through something along your route which will conduct you into another place. Somewhere in that vicinity you will find a black star indicating the next direction you must take-to another place and another star and so on. Eventually, you will emerge in a cavern that houses the Logrus. Conceal yourself as completely as you can and make your observations. When you wish to retreat, reverse the process.”
He shrank himself and flew to my finger.
“Look me up later and let me know your experiences.”
“I was planning to,” came his tiny voice. “I would not wish to add to your probable present paranoia.”
“Keep it up,” I said.
I crossed the room and entered the dragon.
I emerged in a small sitting room, one window looking out over mountains; the other, a desert. There was no one about, and I stepped out into a long hallway. Yes, just as I recalled.
I moved along it, passing a number of other rooms, till I came to a door on my left, which I opened to discover a collection of mops, brooms, buckets, brushes, a heap of cleaning cloths, a basin. Yes, as I remembered. I pointed to the shelves on my right.
“Find the black star,” I said.
“You're serious?” came the small voice.
“Go and see.”
A streak of light proceeded from my index finger, grew distorted as it neared the shelves, folded itself into a line so thin it was no longer present.
“Good luck,” I breathed, and then I turned away.
I closed the door, wondering whether I had done the right thing, consoling myself with the thought that he would have gone looking and doubtless located the Lo
grus eventually, anyway. Whatever was to be on this front, would be. And I was curious as to what he might learn.
I turned and took myself back up the hallway to the little sitting room. It might be my last opportunity at being alone for a time, and I was determined to take advantage of it. I seated myself on a pile of cushions and withdrew my Trumps. A quick run through the deck turned up the one I had hastily sketched of Coral on that recent hectic day back in Amber. I studied her features till the card grew cold.
The image became three-dimensional, and then she slipped away and I saw myself, walking the streets of Amber on a bright afternoon, holding her hand as I led her around a knot of merchants. Then we were descending the face of Kolvir, sea bright before us, gulls passing. Then back in the cafe, table flying against the wall...
I covered the card with my hand. She was asleep, dreaming. Odd, to enter another's dreams that way. Odder, to find myself there-unless, of course, the touch of my mind had prompted unconscious reminiscence... One of life's smaller puzzles. No need to awaken the poor lady, just to ask her how she was feeling. I supposed I could call Luke and ask him how she was doing. I began searching for his card, then hesitated. He must be pretty busy, his first few days on the job as monarch. And I already knew she was resting. As I toyed with Luke's card, though, finally pushing it aside, the one beneath it was revealed.