“Hey,” J.P. said, looking a little alarmed, I think at how fast my tears were coming. “Hey.”
And the next thing I knew, he had wrapped me in his big bearlike embrace, and I was weeping onto the front of his sweater. Which smelled like dry-cleaning fluid.
A fact that actually just made me weep harder, when I remembered that I would never again get to smell the one thing that I miss and love more than any other…Michael’s neck.
Which definitely does not smell of dry-cleaning fluid.
“Shhh,” J.P. said, patting me on the back while I cried. “It’s going to be okay. It really is.”
“I don’t see how,” I sobbed. “Lilly hates me! She won’t even look at me!”
“Well, maybe that should tell you something,” J.P. said.
“Tell me what?” I hiccupped against his chest. “That she hates me? I already know that.”
“No,” J.P. said. “That maybe she’s not as great a friend as you’ve always thought she was.”
This actually caused me to stop crying and sit back and blink at him tearfully.
“Wh-what do you mean?” I asked.
“Well, just that if she really was as good a friend as you seem to think,” J.P. said, “she wouldn’t believe that there’s anything going on between you and me. Because she’d know you aren’t capable of something like that. She certainly wouldn’t be mad atyou for something you didn’t even do—despite maybe a little evidence to the contrary. I mean, did she even bother asking you if that thing in thePost about us was true?”
I dabbed at the corners of my eyes with a napkin J.P. pulled out of a nearby holder and handed to me.
“No,” I said.
“I haven’t had a lot of friends,” J.P. said. “I’ll admit it. But I still don’t think friends treat each other that way—just believing something they read or heard without even confirming whether or not it’s really true. Right? I mean, what kind of friend does that?”
“I know,” I said with a last, shuddering little sob. “You’re right.”
“Look,” J.P. said. “I know you’ve been friends with her forever, Mia. But there’s a lot of stuff about Lilly I don’t think you know. Stuff she told me when we were going out that—well, I mean, for instance, she was always pretty jealous of you.”
I stared at him, totally astonished.
“What are you TALKING about?” I cried. “Why on earth would Lilly ever be jealous of ME?”
“For the same reason I imagine a lot of girls—including Lana Weinberger—are jealous of you. You’re pretty, you’re smart, you’re popular, you’re a princess, everyone likes you—”
“WHAT?” I was laughing now. In disbelief. But still. It was better than crying. “I look like a Q-tip! And I’m flunking half my classes! And MOST of the people in school think I’m nothing but a five-foot-nine, I mean-ten, flat-chested freak—”
“Maybe some of them used to think that,” J.P. said, smiling at me. “And maybe to some of them, you used to seem that way. But, Mia, you need to take a good look at yourself in the mirror. You aren’t that person anymore. And maybe that’s what Lilly’s problem is. You’ve changed…and she hasn’t.”
“That…that’s ridiculous,” I said. “I’m still the same old Mia—”
“Who eats meat and goes shopping with Lana Weinberger,” J.P. pointed out. “Face it, Mia. You’re not the same person you used to be. That doesn’t mean you aren’t BETTER, or that there aren’t people who are going to love you no matter what you eat or who you hang out with. But not everyone is going to be able to wrap their minds around it the way, say, Tina and I have.”
I blinked at him some more. Could this be true? Could the real reason Lilly wanted nothing to do with me be because, far from being disgusted with me, she’s actually jealous of me?
“But that’s so absurd!” I finally burst out. “Lilly’s so much smarter and more accomplished than I am. She’s a genius, for crying out loud! What could I possibly have that she doesn’t? Except a tiara.”
“That’s a big part of it,” J.P. said with a shrug. “The fact that you’re a princessis really special. I’ve never understood why you’ve never thought so. Most people would kill to be royal, and yet you spend all your time wishing you weren’t. Not that being royal isall that makes you special…by any means.”
“If you spent five minutes in my shoes,” I grumbled, “you’d realize hownot special being me really is. Believe me. There’s not a special bone in my body.”
“Mia,” J.P. said, lifting up my hand from the counter. “There’s something I’ve been wanting to tell you—”
But it was right at that moment that the doorman buzzed up to let Tina know her parents were in the foyer (good thing Tina regularly slips the guy batches of her homemade chocolate-chocolate-chip cookies, so he’s totally willing to do her bidding). Tina came barreling in, looking wild-eyed, yelling that Boris and J.P. had to leave through the servants’ entrance RIGHT THEN…which they promptly did.
So I never did get to find out what it was J.P. was going to tell me.
After they were gone, and we’d said hi to her parents and gone into Tina’s room to get away from them, Tina apologized for having spent so much time in a liplock with Boris.
“It’s just,” she said, “he’s so cute, sometimes I can’t help myself.”
“It’s okay,” I told her. “I understand.”
“Still,” Tina fretted. “It was terrible of us to rub how happy we are in your face, when you’re still trying to get over Michael. What did you and J.P. end up talking about, anyway?”
“Oh,” I said uncomfortably. “Nothing, really.”
Tina looked surprised. “Because Boris said when he mentioned you were spending the night with me, J.P. wouldn’t stop talking about how the two of them had to come over here. Even though Boris explained about my dad’s rule. But J.P. kept saying he had something really important he had to tell you, and practically forced Boris to bring him here. Are yousure he didn’t say anything?”
“Well, we talked about a lot of stuff,” I said. I hate lying to Tina! But I can’t tell her we talked about being in therapy. I’m just not ready to admit that to her yet. I know it’s stupid—I know she wouldn’t judge me. But…I just can’t. “You know. Mostly about Lilly.”
“That’s interesting,” Tina said. “You know, Boris thinks J.P.’s in love with you, and I agree. Maybethat ’s what he wanted to say.”
I had a good long laugh at that one. Really, the best laugh I’ve had since Michael and I broke up. The ONLY laugh I’ve had since then, really.
But Tina wasn’t joking, it turned out.
“Look at the facts, Mia,” she said. “J.P. dumped Lilly the minute he heard you and Michael had broken up. He dumped her because he’s in love with you, and he realized he finally had a chance at getting you, now that you’re single.”
“Tina!” I wiped tears from my eyes. “Come on. Be serious.”
“Iam serious, Mia. This totally happened inThe Sheik’s Secret Baby …and I bet that’s why Lilly is so mad at you.”
“Because I gave away the fact that she had the sheik’s secret baby?” I couldn’t help giggling. It’s really hard to feel depressed when you’re around Tina. Even when you’re trapped at the bottom of a cistern.
Tina looked disappointed in me. “No. Because she suspects you’re the real reason why J.P. dumped her. Because he lovesyou. Which is totally unfair of her, because it’s not your fault. You can’t help it if guys fall in love with you, any more than the princess inThe Sheik’s Secret Baby could. But still, you have to admit—that’s totally what happened. It explains EVERYTHING.”
I laughed for, like, ten more minutes. Seriously, Tina lives in the cutest fantasy world. She really should write her own romance novels for a living. Or do stand-up comedy.