“If I do this,” I asked, in a sort of daze—maybe I was crashing from all the bacon—“you’ll tell me, right? If you and J.P. Did It over the summer?”
“Is that your sole motivation for running?” Lilly wanted to know.
“Yes,” I said.
“God, that is so pathetic. But yes, I will. You loser.”
I didn’t take offense at this because she’s right. I AM a loser. She doesn’t even know how much.
Besides, I know that beneath Lilly’s bravado, she is clearly hurting inside. How could she not be? She adored J.P. in a way I’ve never seen her fall for any other guy.
Seriously, how could J.P. do this to her? I thought he was one of the good guys. I really did.
But now I honestly don’t know how I’m going to be able to be friends with him. Let alone lab partners.
Friday, September 10, Chemistry
J.P. is acting like nothing happened! Like he thinks I don’t know about him and Lilly! He asked, “How are you, Mia?” when he sat down next to me, looking all concerned about me. Me! Whenhe’s the one who just stomped on my best friend’s heart!
I was so shocked, I just went, “Fine,” completely forgetting what I decided in the hallway on the way to class—that I am never speaking to J.P. again.
And okay, it isn’t his fault, necessarily, that he doesn’t love Lilly. But he could have told her sooner—like way back in May when she first told him that she loved him—instead of stringing her along this whole time.
Oh…Kenny is passing me a note:
Mia—I was very sorry to hear about you and Michael breaking up. If there is anything I can do to help make you feel better, please let me know.—Kenny
Kenny is so sweet. I can’t believe he doesn’t have a girlfriend. Hey, maybe Lilly—
Well, okay. Probably not. He’s not really her type, seeing as how he weighs less than she does.
Thanks, Kenny. Helping me make sense of all this Chemistry stuff is really all I can think of at the moment. I’m really grateful for all your help.
No problem, Mia! I’m always here for you. Maybe, if you aren’t doing anything tonight, you could come over, and I could help you understand Avogadro’s number. Because I noticed you looked kind of confused by that. Plus, my mom just went to the butcher, so we have lots of bacon, which I hear you’re eating now.
Aw. See? He’s such a nice guy. He TOTALLY needs a girlfriend. Maybe he and Perin would get along???
Oh, thank you, Kenny, that’s very sweet, but I can’t tonight. I’m not really feeling up to understanding anybody’s number yet.
Well, the invitation’s open anytime! You really don’t need to be intimidated by Chemistry. It’s easy—so long as you pay attention.
Good to know! Thanks again.
Amazing.
Oh my God. J.P. just passed me a note! How COULD he? I mean, he has to know how upset I am with him right now. He knows Lilly has G&T with me after lunch. He has to know she told me what he did. How dare he pass me a note? How DARE he?
Well, I’m not writing back. I’m not. I’m keeping my eyes on the blackboard. Chemistry is important, you know. Even princesses have to know it. For some reason.
Still…what’s he talking about? What’s so amazing? What’s amazing?
I can’t believe I did that! I can’t believe I wrote back! What’s WRONG with me?
That you’ve only been single for what, less than 24 hours? And the wolves are already out.
!!!!WHAT???? What is he talking about? Oh, wait, KENNY? Is J.P. insane?
Kenny’s not a wolf! He’s just trying to be nice.
You go right on telling yourself that, if it makes you feel better. How are you doing, though, REALLY?
Ha! Well, he asked for it:
How am I doing? I’ll tell you how I’m doing. I was doing a lot better before you broke up with my best friend!!!!
Let’s see how he responds to THAT.
Oh. She told you.
Of course she told me!!!! What do you think???? Lilly and I tell each other everything. Well, ALMOST everything. J.P., how could you do that to her?
I’m sorry. I didn’t want to. I like Lilly, I really do. Just not the same way she likes me.
She didn’t just LIKE you, she LOVED you. She told you that back in May. If you knew you didn’t love her, why didn’t you tell her then? Why did you have to string her on for so long?
Honestly, I don’t know. I guess I hoped my feelings would change. But they never did. And today, when I saw how she treated you—well, I realized they never would.
Saw how she treated me? What are you TALKING about?
She was so mean to you at lunch. About what happened between you and Michael.
What???? Lilly wasn’t mean to me!!!
Mia, she equated your breaking up with Michael for lying to you with fundamentalist judges in Iran who order adulterous women to be stoned to death.
Oh, THAT. But that’s just Lilly being…LILLY. I mean, that’s just how she is.
Well, that’s not someone I want to be with. That shows a lack of compassion I frankly find unforgivable.
Wait…so you’re saying you broke up with Lilly because of ME???
Well…partly. Yes.
Oh, great. This is just GREAT. Like things aren’t going badly enough. Now I also have to shoulder the burden of responsibility for Lilly’s broken heart?
J.P., that’s just how Lilly IS. I’m USED to it. It doesn’t bother me.
But it SHOULD bother you. You deserve to be treated better. I think you let people treat you badly too often. You dismiss it as “that’s just how that person is.” But that doesn’t make their behavior right, Mia. That’s why I think your taking a stand against Michael for what he did is a real step forward for you.
What is he TALKING about?
I don’t let people treat me badly! I totally broke Lana’s cell phone that one time…well, you weren’t there. But I did.
I’m not saying you NEVER stick up for yourself. I’m just saying it seems to take a lot to finally get a rise out of you. You tend to think the best of people—like Kenny, and his blatant attempt to lure you into his clutches when you’ve been single less than 24 hours.
!
I told you! Kenny only thinks of me as a friend!
Right. You go right on telling yourself that. I’m just glad you finally stuck up for yourself where Michael is concerned. I like Michael, but it was wrong of him to lie to you about his sexual history. I think honesty is the most important thing in a relationship. And if Michael couldn’t be honest with you about something as basic as who he has been with before you, what chance did you two really have at anything long-term?
Wow! FINALLY someone who gets it! Maybe J.P. isn’t that bad after all. I mean, it’s true he dumped Lilly—and at SCHOOL, of all places.
But he seems to really have his priorities straight.
I just hope that you and I can still be friends. I wouldn’t want you to hold my breaking up with Lilly against me. I would hate for that to affect OUR friendship. Because I do consider you a close friend, Mia…one of the best I’ve ever had.