"What do you think?" she asked me.
"I thought I could handle Big Bobby," I told her. "But after that last boff I'm not so sure. When Willie takes off, I think Gurk will come looking for us, and he might get physical. Him and that Miami killer."
"Let me tell you something," Jess said. "Something I haven't told Willie the Weasel, and I don't want you mentioning it to him.
After I saw Teddy O. casing my home, and remembering what Brevoort said about him being a hatchet man, I decided to put the house up for sale.
So I've got it listed with a real estate agent. After we get the ZAP pill, I'm leaving with Willie, and I'm never coming back. Wherever we go, I'll hire a lawyer to handle the sale of the house for me. But I'll be long gone with no forwarding address so Big Bobby Gurk and Teddy O. can't feed me to the sharks. Guys like that scare the hell out of me."
"My God, less," I said. "Then what happens to me? You and Willie will leave me to face the music. And like you said, those guys don't play nice when they think they've been dorked."
She thought a moment. "Laura, do you own that condo of yours?"
"No, it's leased."
"Then you can walk away from it. Take my advice and start packing. Do like I am, I'm taking two suitcases of stuff I really want and just leaving the rest of my shit. What the hell, if you can believe Willie, we'll have all the money in the world to buy new things."
I looked at her. "You know, Jess, I think you're right.
I'll get ready to split as soon as we have the pill. The three of us will leave together."
"Also, she added with a twisty grin, "it won't do any harm to keep an eye on Willie the Weasel, in case he has any cute ideas of screwing us out of our shares." in,m,i like the way you think," I told her.
"I'm beginning to have my doubts about that grifter. ever since he found out He's been running scared Teddy O. was on his tail. We'd be schmucks to let him take off by himself with the pill. We'd probably never hear from him again."
"That's the way I see it," Jess said, nodding. "So the two of us will stick to him like a second skin. just to protect our investment, you know."
"Right on!" I said. "I'm going home now and start packing. You have any idea where you'd like to go after we dump this burg?"
"I've been thinking about New Orleans, " she said.
"I've never been there, and I hear it's a wide-open town."
"Suits me," I said. "I'm ready for a change of scene.
Anyplace where Big Bobby Gurk isn't part of the landscape."
I finished my drink, kissed Jessica good-night, and headed for home.
I turned into the parking lot of my condo just as a black Camry was coming out. I saw the driver in my headlights, a little guy wearing wire-rimmed specs. I could have sworn he smiled at me.
I almost wet my pants.
I wasn't surprised that Gurk had told Teddy O. where I lived, but it was a shock to see him keeping tabs on me. I hurried inside, locked the door, drew the drapes. I pulled out two suitcases and started packing.
I had some nice things, and it was going to break my heart to leave most of them behind, but it had to be done. I finally selected my favorites, not the stuff William K. Brevoort was storing in my closets.
Wherever we were going, the sonofabitch could buy his own dresses. got up Tuesday morning with the usual industrial strength hangover.
When I stared in the bathroom mirror, I could see what all the boozing and whoring was doing to me. I was beginning to look like an old lush, my face pasty and bloated. I wondered how long it would take my liver to collapse, just like my father's.
Marleen had left for work, and Tania was out somewhere, so after I showered and shaved, I wandered next door to cadge a black coffee.
Mabel Bar row was sitting at her kitchen table flipping the pages of a tabloid magazine. She glanced up as I came in.
"Herm, you look shot," she said.
"I am shot," I admitted. "But nothing that your delicious coffee won't cure. How about it?"
She got up to make me a cup of instant and put out a plate of glazed doughnuts. She was wearing pink plastic curlers in her hair. That turns me off. But she was also wearing, a T-shirt (no bra) and short shorts. That turns me on.
She sat across the table from me and nibbled on a doughnut.
I know it will sound like I was around the bend, but the sight of her sharp white teeth biting into that doughnut was the sexiest thing I had ever seen, and I decided it was time to go for broke.
"Tomorrow's the day," I told her.
"For what?" she said, all innocence.
"What you and I talked about," I said. "The romance of the ages."
"I don't know," she said hesitatingly. "I'm not sure.
I reached across the table to take her hand. "Mabel," I said, looking directly into her eyes, "don't pass up this chance, or you'll regret it for the rest of your life-and so will I. You and I are meant for each other, I just know it. We think alike, and we feel alike. We both want the same thing-a little fun, a little- happiness, before we get too old to enjoy it. Am I right?"
She nodded.
"Then let's do it," I urged her. "Tomorrow at noon. No one will know, no one will find out. just you and me. It'll be our secret, and it'll be great." She finished her doughnut and licked her fingers. "What should I wear, Herm?" she asked in a low voice.
I grinned at her. "Whatever you can get out of in a hurry.
We're not going to be playing Chinese checkers, you know. Mabel, this is going to be the joy of a lifetime. I'm going to love you like you've never been loved before."
"I've got to get home in time to make dinner. if "That'll give us at least four hours together. Four hours of paradise."
"You'll get there before me?"
"Guaranteed.
"And there won't be any problems with the desk clerk?
"Absolutely not. I'll grease his palm to make sure.
There's an ice machine in the lobby. What do you want me to bring along to drink?"
"I like Galliano."
"You've got it. I'll even bring a lime. Now let I'll write down the me have a piece of paper, and I address and how to get there."
Before I left the Barrow kitchen, we embraced and exchanged a soul kiss.
My God, she was soft.
And so ready! I could feel it.
"Wednesday noon," I whispered in her ear. I'm going to take you to the stars."
"Don't forget the Galliano," she said.
I drove to my office as horny and excited as a teenager.
The first thing I did was phone the motel and reserve a room for noon on Wednesday, September 2. I asked for a vibrating bed, figuring it might be good for a laugh.
I slaved all day, catching up on the paperwork I had been neglecting.
I went out for lunch but didn't have a single drink.
I was determined to stay sober and get to bed early. I wanted to be physically fit for the motel scene on Wednesday. I, just knew it was going to be a memorable bang.
I was a Boy Scout for the remainder of the day, worked hard, treated my employees with respect (to their shock), and went directly home from the office. I did stop briefly to pick up fresh flowers and a key lime pie.
Question, Why are married men who plan to cheat so attentive to their wives beforehand?
What a nice, peaceable, domestic evening that was! Marleen loved the flowers, and Tania loved the pie. But I think what they liked best was that, for the first time in a long time, I was acting like a "man of the house," a sober and solicitous husband and father. To tell you the truth, I didn't find it a trial. I think I enjoyed it.
I may have been wrong, but that night I had the feeling that with a little salesmanship I could have persuaded Marleen to let me into her bed. I didn't make the effort. All I could think about were sharp, white teeth biting into a glazed doughnut. I guess there are words for guys like me. Schmo is one of them.