I glance at her in confusion. “Why what?”
She releases an exasperated sigh. “Why have you been so nice all day? Why are you pretending like you want me? Why are you letting me believe that you could ever want something with me?” Her voice slurs a bit but they say that alcohol is like a truth serum sometimes.
“Maybe I do want you.” I don’t know what else to say. I’m not sure I’m at a place where I can really tell her everything.
“Why? You want to hop on the gravy train before it crashes? You know I don’t have many good years left. I’m already starting to “fill out”, my music is getting shittier and shittier because that’s what’s popular. I have nothing to offer you but money. If that’s what you want, just take it now and save me the heartache.” She is looking out the window so I can’t read her face. I hate that she feels like this. Honestly, I want to kick anyone’s ass that has ever done her wrong. She is an amazing person and doesn’t deserve half of the shit that she gets thrown at her. Then I realize that I was one of those people, maybe even one of the worst, and I feel like shit.
When we stop at a light, I grasp her chin and turn her head to face me. The sadness and loneliness that haunts her is apparent. “You have so much more than money, Sam. When we get back to the hotel, I will show you that.”
I can start to feel the change in myself when I’m around her.
It’s a scary fucking feeling.
Chapter Eleven
Samantha
“You have so much more than money, Sam. When we get back to the hotel, I will show you that.” His comment resonates deep within me. What the hell is that supposed to mean?
I want to ask but the tequila is making my head spin and I can’t think clearly. So we sit in silence as we head toward the room. As we get closer, I start to feel like a jerk for lashing out at him. He did so much for me….he finally let me in.
Seeing him around his friends and dropping that “I’m the asshole King” attitude was nice. I was nervous that they wouldn’t like me, but the way they welcomed me into their group really made me wish I had a circle of people like that in my life.
He opens the door to the hotel room and I know I should say something to him. Just as I’m about to, he takes the lead and says, “Listen, I know I’ve acted like an asshole, and I’m not going to lie to you and say that it won’t happen again. That’s kind of who I am. There is something about you, Sam. Something that I can’t put my finger on. Something that I can’t stay away from. Something that I need.” He leans down to kiss me and every conscious thought I had in my head floats away. I get lost in him, in the feeling of his kiss. Every inch of my body is screaming for him.
I jump and pull away from Hunter as a loud slam echoes through the room. My mother is standing in the middle of the room, looking so mad that her head might pop off. “What the hell have you been doing all day, Samantha Baker?! I have been calling you non-stop, then I get word that you are finally back at the hotel and walk into this? I knew you were desperate, but do you really need to sleep with the help?”
My mouth drops open at her statement. The help? What the hell century are we in? “I’m an adult and I can do whatever I want. You have to stop dismissing him. He isn’t just an employee. He matters to me.” I know I sound like a rebellious teenager.
“You have a career beyond anything that he could ever dream of.” She looks at Hunter with such disdain. “You need to wise up before you lose everything. Do you really think that he would be with you if you didn’t have everything that you do?”
I want to answer her and tell her that he would, but I have those doubts myself. Hunter steps toward my mother. “Listen Audrey, I put up with your shit. I have let you talk to your daughter like she is some damn dog. I’m done. Don’t pretend to know me or my motives. You are nothing but a pathetic excuse for a human, who is capitalizing on her daughter’s success. What is it that they say? Those who can’t do, manage?” He gives her a smirk as he stares her down.
He walks away from her and I hear a bedroom door shut behind me. “I think you need to leave,” I say with much less assertiveness than I would have wanted.
“If you choose to sink yourself, that’s fine. Don’t come crying to me when you end up alone, pregnant, and even bigger than you are now. You still have responsibilities tomorrow. If you can get yourself out of bed with him, that is.” She gracefully turns and leaves without another word.
I turn, wanting nothing else but to run into my room and withdraw from everyone and everything. When I do, I see Hunter standing in the doorway. He opens his arms to me and I take advantage and run into them. His hands surround me and I let myself sink against his chest. He begins to walk us backward into the room. When we come to a stop, I look up to see us standing in front of a mirror. I turn away, not wanting to see the weak person I have become.
Hunter turns my body so my back is flush against his front. “Look at yourself.” I shake my head, a tear slipping down my cheek. His hand grabs my chin, slowly turning my face toward the offending object.
“I don’t want to.” It comes out as a whisper, just as weak as the person who is saying it.
“Samantha.” It’s all he says. Silence surrounds us and after a minute or two, I look up at him through the mirror at our reflection. “Look at yourself.”
My eyes focus on the image in front of me. Hunter’s head is resting on my shoulder, his eyes unwavering. It’s like I can feel them inside of me. Like he can see what I hide from everyone else. His hands slowly move down my sides until they reach the hem of my shirt. When he lifts it over my head, I look toward the floor. No one would ever guess the girl on every magazine cover can’t stand to look at herself.
All I see when I look in the mirror are flaws. My theory is, if I don’t look, I can pretend they aren’t there. Hunter’s chin scratches at my neck, eliciting a giggle. “Eyes on us, cupcake.”
I don’t look up immediately and he is quiet until I do. When I look into the mirror, I can feel his hands moving toward my back, unclasping my bra. As it falls to the floor, I’m exposed in more ways then one. Hunter’s hands wrap around me as he pulls me even closer to him.
“I know you may not see it, but you’re fucking beautiful Sam. Every inch of you is perfect.” His hands trail up until they reach my breasts, cupping them, his fingers gently tugging at my nipples. I moan as he touches me. It feels amazing and having his eyes on me as he does it is exhilarating.
“I have wanted to touch you since the night I let you go.” His hands tug harder as he rolls my nipples simultaneously. I arch into him, begging him for more. When he freezes I look at him. “Your eyes stay on us or I stop. You are beautiful and I want you to see that. I want you to see what I want to do to you every minute of every day.” I nod in acknowledgement. I groan when he releases my breasts and lowers himself to the floor. His hands grab the waistband of my shorts; he pulls the shorts and my panties down at the same time. As his fingers slowly move down my leg, I break out in goosebumps.
He rises and stands behind me once more. “Look at yourself, Samantha. You might see flaws, but I don’t. You are gorgeous. There isn’t a part of you that doesn’t drive me crazy. You are perfect the way you are and having a slice of pizza or eating regularly isn’t going to destroy you. I can’t stand that you made yourself sick, and it kills me that I didn’t say something to you when I wanted to.” His hands wrap around me, settling on my chest. He positions his mouth next to my ear and his hot breath shoots warmth through my entire body. “It isn’t just your body, though. I’ve seen the way you stare off into space when you think no one is watching. You might think you hide yourself well, and you do, but I see it. I can see how much your mother hurts you. I can’t tell you how much what she says to you isn’t true. You deserve everything you have, and you have earned it, not her. Don’t let her take that away from you.”