What the actual fuck? This lady has a lot of damn nerve. If I didn’t need this job, I would tell her to fuck off. I’ve never made as much money on any of my other assignments, so I just smile and nod when I want to push her face first into the sand.
“Samantha, hmmm, I don’t know about that outfit.” I turn to look at her and am speechless. She is wearing a gold sequin bikini; the sun is shining off of it and illuminating her skin. The girl has some dangerous curves and I don’t know how the hell I will last through this whole shoot without touching her. “What have you been eating?” She walks in a circle, inspecting every aspect of her. “You know I try to tell you how one day of cheating can hurt your body. I mean, you are lucky they had a big enough size for you.” My eyes bug out of my head at the nerve of this woman. I can’t believe Sam tolerates her.
Her mother walks away without a word and I can see the defeat in her eyes. I can’t not say anything. I walk up to her, grasping her chin in between my thumb and forefinger, lifting her head so our eyes meet. I know people might be watching but right now, I don’t care. My only concern is the beautiful girl standing in front of me, looking like she was just crushed. “Don’t listen to a fucking word she says. You look goddamn gorgeous. When you stepped out of that trailer, I stopped fucking breathing.” A tear slips down her cheek and I swipe it away. “Don’t let her get in your head. Go out there and rock that shit, cupcake.” She smiles at me and nods.
She walks off toward the water and I can’t help but stare at her ass.
I am in fucking trouble.
Chapter Five
Samantha
When my mother tore me down, I thought I might lose it. I wanted to crawl back into the trailer with my tail between my legs and put on a parka. I mean, the bathing suit was a small, I guess no one ever told her zero isn’t a size. She thinks I eat junk food when she isn’t looking, but I couldn’t if I wanted to. Every time I even look at something unhealthy I feel sick. She has engrained in me that I’m already too heavy and that junk food will make me look like a slob. No matter how hard I try with diets and exercise, I can’t make her happy. No matter how many people say how amazing I look, she is convinced that they are just being nice. This year I was ranked number five on the top one hundred sexiest celebrities; you should have heard the list of reasons she gave me for why I didn’t get number one.
When Hunter witnessed the exchange between us, I was so embarrassed. I never expected him to react or say the things that he did. Before today, I was simply attracted to him; there was a sexual connection. After today, I’m scared to admit that I might want more, which is a scary thought because I know he won’t give that to me. I feel like when he looks at me, he sees the real person. Not the celebrity. Not the girl everyone wants a piece of, but me.
Having to do a photo shoot in a barely there bikini after being told I’m a heffer, isn’t really an ideal situation but like most things in my life, I just have to grin and bear it. Sometimes I wish that I could do a cute shoot with clothes on. The photographer starts with shots of me standing in front of the ocean and walking along the beach. Next, he has me lay down in the sand. I’m rolling around, letting it fall through my fingers and for a minute, I’m actually having fun.
“Samantha!” I hear my mother call from a few feet away. “Hold your head up straight! You need to hide the double chin.” My mood plummets, and I think the photog senses it.
“Okay, next series of shots are going to be in the water. I need you to go out at about mid-thigh level. Fair warning it’s cold, but I need you to push past it. Have fun with it.”
I nod and take a deep breath. When the first wave hits me, I let out a yelp. My shoulders rise up to my ears and I suck in my stomach in a lame attempt to get away from it. It is like ice water. Well, this should be fun. I get as far as I need to and then turn toward everyone. My eyes land on my mother, modeling poses she thinks my body looks best in. It would feel amazing to make her happy, just once. I am so not in the mood for this anymore.
I look for the photographer and he is standing right in front of Hunter. He starts to snap shots and I pretend I’m looking at him when the entire time my gaze never leaves Hunter’s. He is standing with his arms crossed in front of him as if he is unfazed, but I can tell different. His gaze drags over me, creating a heat that flows through my body, making the temperature of the water unnoticeable. I begin to move as he is watching. To everyone else I’m posing, but for him I’m putting on a show. I want him to want me. I want him to give into the urges that he is fighting.
I turn my back to him, looking over my shoulder and running my hand through my hair. I’m using every move I have and I hope he is as affected as I am. I have no idea why I want him to want me. All he has done since I met him is leave me hanging and make me crazy. There is something about him though, something that he hides. I see it in the way he looks at me when he thinks I’m not paying attention. I felt it today when he helped me past my mother’s harsh words.
Hunter Stone is a mystery that I desperately want to solve.
“Alright, I think we have it!” The photographer calls out and I walk back toward everyone. I’m met with towels and start shivering immediately. I practically run to the trailer needing to warm up and get changed. My mother follows me and I really wish she would just leave me alone. I already know what’s coming.
“Okay, so let’s talk about the shoot.” After every photoshoot, appearance, performance she comes to me to talk about what areas I need to improve on. Last night, she couldn’t be bothered to actually stay to speak to me. I got a text with a list of improvements that need to be completed. I think if she ever gave me a compliment I would go into shock. “Your posture and posing need a lot of work. You need to figure out how to work with your body and hide your flaws until you can improve them. Have you been seeing that trainer?”
“Yes, Mother. Four days a week.” I pull on my shirt and try to push back the tears welling in my eyes.
“Let’s push it up to six days. You obviously need a more rigorous routine. Also, do not think I didn’t see the exchange between you and that boy. I will fire him in an instant if I even think there is something going on between the two of you. I will not have some middle class nobody drag you down. I’m sure he sees your money and fame as a way to get an easy ride. You need to use your head.” Her voice is so monotone, it’s like she is talking to me about the weather. What would she say if she knew he has already been inside me?
I pull up my shorts and slip into my heels. “Understood. I need to get to the meet and greet, then ready for the show tonight.”
I walk out of the trailer with no goodbye, no I love you, purely business as always. I see Hunter over at the lunch station. He is talking to one of the production assistants, and even from this far away, it’s clear that she is interested in him. Who could blame her? Guys like Hunter have this insane magnetism. I shake my head for thinking I could ever have him. He would never be with me and only me when he can have any girl he wants.
Everyone sees me as this confident person. The girl on the magazine cover, the girl who can walk around in barely anything on stage, the girl who doesn’t need anyone. It’s all lies. None of that is me. I’m the girl who hates to look in the mirror sometimes. The one who wants to hug the wall at parties for fear of everyone judging her. The girl who wishes she had someone in her life who cared. Someone who saw her, and not the person she pretends to be.
I walk away, not wanting to bother Hunter. I’ll just wait for him in the car. My stomach growls but I ignore it, hearing my mother’s words echo in my head. As I walk to the car, I try to take deep breaths. I need to push the emotions back down. I reach the car and climb in, needing to shut the world out for a few minutes so I can put the mask back on that everyone is used to seeing. I lean my head back against the seat, closing my eyes.