I stand up to look out at Central Park and think. Then I hear a knock at the door. Someone turns the knob, apparently sent in by Melanie. I stay looking out the window, literally too scared to turn around. I am afraid to see my future.
“Hailey.”
I know the voice. I let out my breath that I’ve been holding.
I turn around to face him. “Chase.”
“I brought lunch for us. You have time to sit and eat?”
“Yes, of course. Listen, Chase, about the reunion. I’m sorry for how I acted. I was holding on to bitter memories.”
“Let’s just talk. Don’t worry about that.”
A tear falls down my face even though I really don’t want to get emotional right now.
“What’s wrong?” he asks, walking reluctantly toward me.
“No one has ever done anything this nice for me before. Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me. You deserve it.” He puts his hand on my cheek. “You have always been special, Hailey. You just never saw it within yourself. I saw it.”
He reaches in and kisses me. I wasn’t expecting it! Chase O’Brien is in my office kissing me. It’s like a dream. His lips are warm against my lips. His tongue moves in circles, tormenting mine. My body wants more; my brain knows differently. Our lips part, but I want more of his kisses.
“Now that that’s over with…” he jokes.
“Let’s go sit at the table and eat,” I suggest.
He is such a gentleman. He grabs the bag of food and pulls the chair out for me.
“This is really nice, your setup here, I mean. I’m really happy for you.”
“Thanks. I worked really hard to get here. What do you do for a living?” I ask. I am actually quite curious. I may not have followed up on him since high school, but I never forgot him.
“I’m a pharmacist, and I play on a professional lacrosse team here in New York. It’s a traveling team, so I’m on the run a lot.”
“That sounds like fun.”
“It is. Lacrosse has always been my life. I figured I might as well do it now because, at some point, I’ll have to give it up. I’ve gotten injured a few times, as well.”
The thought of him injured and in need of caretaking crosses my mind. I always saw him as a strong person. Next thought… No… erase it from my mind.
“It’s great to go for your dreams. You were an awesome lacrosse player.” As if I know anything about lacrosse.
“Have you ever seen me play?” he asks, smiling.
Do I lie and say no? Or do I admit that I did actually go watch some of his games?
“Maybe once or twice. This salad is so good,” I say, changing the subject. “You created the perfect blend.”
“Thanks. It’s my favorite. Are you in a relationship?”
He catches me off guard with that one. Maybe we should go back to talking about lacrosse.
“No, me and my ex broke up, like, two months ago. He was an asshole.” I smirk and see him squirm in his seat. “My best friend Erica caught him with some girl at a restaurant having dinner.”
“Wow, I’m sorry. Sounds like my life. My sister’s best friend caught my ex, Megan, with some guy in a bar. She was in bed with him the next morning when I finally spoke with her. She told me she had a migraine and was staying home all night.”
“Wait, did you say Megan?”
“Yes.”
“That’s the girl’s name that my ex was seeing…”
“That would be crazy. I don’t know who the guy was who she cheated with.”
“Well, if his name is Sam, then it’s my ex.”
“I don’t speak with her at all, so I will never find out.”
That makes me happy.
“I wish. Sam calls trying to get back with me all the time. I’ll never forgive him.”
“I don’t blame you. I feel the same way.” He sits back in his chair and smiles at me. “You’re beautiful, Hailey.”
“Aww, thanks, Chase. Don’t make me blush.”
“Well, you are.”
I divert my attention. I’m still not comfortable with compliments.
“The roses are gorgeous.” He probably thinks I’m crazy.
“Like you,” he responds.
“Chase?” I look at him. “What do you want with me? I don’t understand it.”
“I don’t know what I want, but I know it involves you. Since I saw you at the bar that day, I haven’t stopped thinking about you. After the reunion, I couldn’t understand why you didn’t want anything to do with me.”
“It’s complicated, and after you left, Carrie threatened me. She told me to stay away from you.”
“She did what? She doesn’t own me. I don’t want anything to do with her.”
He seems pissed off. Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything.
He continues, “I found out what’s going on with her. Parker talked to Laney. I’m not sure why they used to hate each other. Laney told him that, back when me and Carrie were together, she started getting involved in drugs. Laney and Paulina weren’t into it, so Carrie started hanging with different people. She was lying to her parents by saying she was with Laney and Paulina. Finally, after high school, they had a huge blowup and stopped talking. I never knew why. I only got Carrie’s version of the story. I was so stupid. Now that I know the truth, I feel like such an asshole. I should have left her, knowing how she treated people and especially how she treated you.”
He looks at me with a sad look. I feel sorry for him right now and want to console him, but I don’t have that right.
“Laney also said that Carrie got addicted to pills and started doing some hard core shit like meth and heroin,” he adds. “That was way after we broke up. One day, Laney saw her all drugged up in the streets and tried to help her. Carrie wouldn’t go for it, and Laney got so mad, she went to Carrie’s parents. They eventually had her put away. She has two kids with two different guys. Laney said she’s been clean for two years now but won’t talk to her because she went to her parents.”
“That’s just so sad. I mean she treated me horribly, but I don’t wish addiction on anyone.” I know the feeling all too well.
“I should have seen the signs. Maybe I could have helped her.”
Hearing him say maybe he could have helped her makes me feel hurt. I know it shouldn’t. I’m not an evil person, but she hurt me. I don’t want to see him blame himself or still feel for her. I’m jealous. I hate that feeling.
“It wasn’t your fault. Addiction happens no matter what. To overcome it, you have to want to help yourself or you’ll never be cured. I know all too well.”
“I have an addiction,” he says in a serious tone.
“Oh yeah? What is it?”
“You. And I don’t want help for it. I don’t want to be cured.”
“You always know just what to say, don’t you?”
He laughs and then becomes serious. “Come here a second.”
I go to him. He pulls me down to kiss him, his hand behind my neck. I start to get aroused. I want him—but it is just too soon. I pull away.
“Why are you afraid of me?” He looks curious.
“I’m not,” I lie.
“Will you go out with me? And can I have your cell phone number?”
“Yes,” I say shyly.
“I’m off work tonight. I want to see you. Do you want to go out somewhere or just hang out at my house?”
Oh dear God, I don’t know if I’m strong enough to be alone with him.
“Whatever is best for you…” That’s not what I really wanted to say, but it just comes out.
“I can cook dinner for you.” He smiles and oh, is it a sexy one.
“That sounds good. We can watch a movie.”
“Whatever you want… I have Netflix, so it’s your choice. What kind of wine do you like?”
“White wine is good for me,” I reply.
He stands up. “It’s a date.”
“I guess it is,” I say, looking into his eyes.
He kisses my cheek. “’Til tonight.”
“’Til’ tonight,” I repeat softly as he walks out of my office.