“What reality show?”
“Passion Island.”
“I love that show!” Kingman cried. “Wilbur watches it all the time. He even signed up for the auditions but he wasn’t selected.”
“Auditions?” I asked. “But I thought Wilbur was a bachelor?”
“Yeah, shouldn’t he audition for The Bachelor instead?” asked Dooley, indicating he knew his reality shows well. Then again, Dooley spends a lot of time with Gran, and if anyone is a reality show aficionado, it’s Odelia’s grandmother.
“He wanted to try out for seducer,” Kingman explained.
We all glanced up at Wilbur. The gaunt, white-bearded, rheumy-eyed old man was watching Tom & Jerry and chuckling delightedly, slapping his thighs in the process.
“He doesn’t look like a seducer,” Dooley said, and I thought that was probably the understatement of the year.
“No, the producers didn’t even invite him,” said Kingman. “Too bad. Wilbur said he could have done a lot of damage.”
I winced at the notion of Wilbur Vickery putting on his best seduction game. Somehow the prospect didn’t hold a lot of appeal.
“Look, if Odelia decides to go to Thailand, all you gotta do is say no,” said Kingman. “She’s your human, but that doesn’t mean you have to do what she says. You simply tell her no, not this time, and you stay home. Someone will be there to look after you guys, right?”
“Yeah, Gran definitely isn’t going,” I said.
“See? Problem solved. In fact maybe it will do you some good. No Odelia means no cases to solve or clues to hunt. Consider this a nice little vacation.”
Dooley’s face cleared, and I have to confess that the prospect of spending three weeks doing absolutely nothing sounded pretty sweet to me, too. Eating, sleeping… more eating.
Three cats came sashaying down the sidewalk, wagging their tails, and Kingman gave them his best grin. “Hey, ladies, did I tell you the story of the big hairy rat and how I defeated that sucker?”
It was clear we’d just been dismissed, and so we went on our way.
“Kingman is right, Max,” said Dooley. “If Odelia goes to Thailand we simply tell her we don’t want to go, on account of the fact that we don’t like to be eaten. She’ll understand.”
I agreed wholeheartedly. And so it was with a spring in our step and the prospect of three weeks vacation on our minds that we continued our daily perambulation of Hampton Cove.
Chapter 8
Odelia was in her editor’s office, discussing Kimmy’s request. Dan, his brow creased and his long white beard waggling, was clearly thinking hard.
“So… you’d have to go all the way to Thailand for three weeks?”
“Kimmy can get both me and Chase signed up as one of the four couples. It would be perfect. We could talk to everyone involved in the show’s production and find out what’s going on.”
“It could be dangerous,” Dan said.
“I know, but Chase will be there in case something goes wrong.”
“Mh…” said Dan, clearly not fully convinced. He was fingering his beard now, presumably digging around for crumbs he’d missed during his morning grooming session. Odelia had always wondered how men like Dan managed to keep their beards so immaculate. If she had a beard like that it would very quickly turn into a receptacle for anything that failed to go down the hatch while indulging in the occasional snack or sitting down for her three square meals a day.
“You don’t think it’s a good idea?”
“Mh…” Dan repeated, and swiveled a little in his swivel chair. “I took a quick look at the women Kimmy claims have gone missing, and it strikes me that they’re all the same type: blond, slim and pretty.” He waggled his bushy brows. “Just like someone else I know.”
“Oh? Who?”
“You, of course! You’re the spitting image of the five women who’ve disappeared. So if there’s some kidnapper at work who likes to snatch women who’ve been on Passion Island he’ll grab you in a heartbeat.”
Odelia laughed. “No one in his right mind would try to snatch me, Dan.”
His response was another brow waggle.
“I’m not even pretty!”
“Oh, you foolish woman,” said Dan with a sigh. “Of course you are. And you have to wonder if you’re not putting yourself in harm’s way here, simply because Kimmy doesn’t want to hire a professional.”
“I am a professional,” said Odelia, expanding a little.
Dan gave her a warm smile. “A professional reporter, not a professional detective.”
“It would make for a great story,” she said, deciding to dangle the carrot. She knew Dan was a sucker for a killer story, whether it was related to Hampton Cove or not.
“It is a great story,” he agreed. “At least if the reporter writing it survives long enough to hand in her copy.”
“Nothing’s gonna happen to me, Dan,” she assured her boss. “Like I said, Chase will be there, and so will my cats.”
“Your cats won’t be able to stop anyone from grabbing you, and if I understand the concept of Passion Island, and I think I do, Chase will be dumped on a different island and not allowed anywhere near you. They’ll even take away your phone.”
“It’ll be fine,” she said with a careless wave of the hand. “I can take care of myself.”
“Mh…”
“I can do it in my spare time if you want! I have some vacation racked up.”
He studied her keenly, eyes sparkling with mirth. “Tell you what. You make sure you win this thing. Cause as far as I can tell, no winner of the show has been snatched, right?”
“Is that why you’re so worried?” She laughed. “You think I’ll allow one of those musclebound idiots to seduce me? Fat chance!”
“It’s not you I’m worried about, sweetheart,” said Dan, real concern lacing his voice.
She gaped at her editor, aghast. “You think… Chase will fall for some painted bimbo?”
“He’s a man, Odelia,” her editor declared solemnly, “and men are weak.”
“Not Chase. Uh-uh. Plus, we’re getting married in September.”
“Exactly. A man who’s about to be tied down for life is like a cat on a hot tin roof. He’s liable to make some very strange moves.”
She shook her head. “Nope. No way. Chase would never cheat on me.”
“If you say so.”
“I am saying so! Chase doesn’t even look at other women. He’s absolutely faithful, and I have complete faith in him.”
Dan spread his arms. “Looks like you’ve got all your bases covered.”
“You mean… it’s a go?”
He smiled. “It’s a go.” But then he raised his finger, like a schoolteacher about to dispense some nuggets of wisdom. “Just promise me you won’t put yourself in danger, and the moment you see anyone act suspicious, tell Kimmy, so she can send in the cavalry.”
“Well, let’s hope the cavalry, in the form of Chase, won’t be too busy with his harem of seductresses to come running when the call goes out,” said Odelia with a grin.
Dan nodded seriously. “Let’s hope so.”
“I was kidding!”
“I was not,” said Dan. “For a couple that’s about to tie the knot, the last thing I would advise is to participate in a show like Passion Island.”
“Don’t worry, Dan,” said Odelia as she got up. “Both Chase and I are professionals. This is just a job for us, not an opportunity to go wild.”
But as she left the office, she had the impression Dan still wasn’t fully on board with the scheme. And she had to admit that his attitude had sown the first seeds of doubt in her mind. Maybe Dan was right. Subjecting Chase to six seasoned seductresses—some of the most beautiful women on the planet—eager to do anything and everything in their power to lure him into their beds, maybe wasn’t the best idea for a man about to say ‘I do.’
But then she shrugged off Dan’s misgivings. The man was old and cynical. That’s what you got from being a newspaperman for forty years. You got jaded.