“You have to talk to Dewey, Marsella.”
“I did talk to him, when the first of his exes got in touch. He admitted dating her, but said that he’d been a different person back then.” She gave Shelley a hesitant look. “He says that none of those girls meant anything to him. That I’m the only one for him now.The one. That the moment we met he knew his old life of casual dating was finally over.”
“He could be right. Three years is a long time. He’s probably older and wiser now.”
“You think?”
“Has any of these girls dated him since you met?”
“No. Mary-Lynn was three years ago, and the other one, um… Francine—four years.”
“See? I’m sure that if Dewey was cheating on you, you’d know. It’s hard to keep this stuff secret in this day and age of social media.”
“Yeah, but if he really was dating some other girl she wouldn’t tell me, would she? She’d simply hope the wedding doesn’t go through. Or maybe she’s one of those girls who don’t mind dating a married man—even prefers it, for the lack of attachment.”
“Look, if you really wanted to be sure, you’d almost have to hire a private detective. Have Dewey followed around the clock to see if he’s as committed to you as he says he is.”
She gave the girl a keen look.
“Oh, no, you didn’t,” said Shelley, clearly shocked.
“No, I didn’t,” she admitted. “But I have considered it.”
“Well, maybe you should. Just to put your mind at ease.”
“It’s just that… he’s such a catch, you know. It’s very hard to date a man who’s as attractive and as successful as Dewey. A lot of insecurities suddenly start to pop up.”
“Hey, don’t sell yourself short, Marsella,” said Shelley, giving her a gentle nudge. “You’re quite a catch yourself, you know. In fact it’s Dewey who should be worried, not you.”
She smiled and felt her mood lift.“You always know what to say to make me feel better, don’t you?”
“Then it’s a good thing you made me your maid of honor.”
Just then, a family with two little girls walked into the office, and work beckoned, cutting their conversation short. But as she escorted the family out to take a look at the kennels, she found herself revisiting the idea of hiring a private detective. If it offered her peace of mind, why not? And so she decided to check listings for PIs in the area tonight.
Chapter 4
It had been a particularly lazy morning for us. Odelia and Chase had both left and gone to work, and for once all four of us had opted to stay home and relax instead. Lately Odelia hadn’t stepped out of the office much, since she was about to give birth any moment now, and so Dan had figured it was unwise for her to go out and interview people until after she’d delivered the baby. Odelia’s opinion in the matter was different, of course: she wanted to keep busy right up until the last possible moment, and her doctor hadn’t given her any indication why she couldn’t, which strengthened her in her view.
But with nothing much going on at the paper, and nothing going on at the police station, Dooley, Brutus, Harriet and myself had figured we should take advantage of these final days or weeks before the big change was upon us: the arrival of the new baby.
“So do you think it’s going to be a boy or a girl?” asked Dooley, not for the first time.
“I don’t know, Dooley, and Odelia isn’t telling, so speculation is pointless.”
“But why, Max? Why aren’t they telling us? We have a right to know.”
“Not really,” I said. “And besides, maybe they don’t know themselves.”
“I think they know,” said Harriet. “And they’re simply not telling anyone.”
“But why!” Dooley insisted. “We have to know, so we can prepare ourselves.”
“What difference does it make?” I said. “Babies are babies, whatever their gender.”
“That’s where you’re wrong, Max,” said Brutus. “There’s a huge difference.”
“Of course there is,” I said, yawning and hoping everyone would shut up so I could get some nap time in. Why else had we stayed home if not to enjoy some peace and quiet while we still could?
“Boys are much more rambunctious,” said Brutus. “Girls are quieter. So my vote is for a girl.”
“It’s not an election, sweetie,” said Harriet. “We don’t get to vote.”
“I know, but if we could vote, I’d choose a girl. So fingers crossed.”
“You don’t even have fingers,” I pointed out.
“I think it’s going to be a girl,” said Dooley.
“What makes you say that?” said Brutus.
“One of your silly documentaries again?” said Harriet.
“They’re not silly, and for your information I read about this on the internet. You can see from the shape of the belly whether it’s going to be a boy or a girl, and I’m almost one hundred percent sure Odelia’s belly is a girl belly. It’s more… oval? More round, you know.”
I didn’t know, and frankly I didn’t care. Babies are pretty much all the same in my experience: small and loud and annoying. I just hoped they’d get it over with and bring it home already. And if it did prove to be too much for us, we could always move next door and spend the formative years of thechild’s life with Marge and Tex.
“How long does it take for a baby to become less of a nuisance?” I asked.
“Years,” said Brutus.
“Years?” It wasn’t the answer I’d hoped for. “I thought months.”
“Oh, no. They only develop into actual human beings when they get their first job and strike out on their own, which is probably when they turn twenty-four, maybe twenty-three if you’re lucky. If they can’t land a decent job they can’t move into their own place and then you’re stuck with them pretty much indefinitely. In fact Tigger was telling us the other day that his human’s daughter is still living with them, even though she’s thirty.”
“Thirty!”
“Can you imagine?”
“Thirty years of diapers,” said Dooley knowingly.
“I don’t think kids wear diapers until they’re thirty,” said Harriet. “Probably they grow out of the habit much sooner.”
“Some kids are fine,” said Brutus. “Tigger’s human’s daughter is all right and she has been all right for a long time. Doesn’t scream or shout or make his life miserable. In fact she’s the one who feeds him now and even cleans out his litter box. But they tell me that’s rare. Most kids refuse to do anything around the home. They just sort of mope around.”
We all looked appropriately impressed.“Tigger is lucky,” I said finally.
“It’s a lottery,” said Brutus, repeating a universal truth we’d heard from many sources. “Either you end up with some pocket psychopath who likes to pull tails and poke eyes, or you end up with Tigger’s human’s daughter, who’s a very normal, very nice person.”
“Which is why we need to pray Odelia has a girl, you guys,” said Dooley. “Because we all know that girls are nice and boys are hellraisers who’ll make our lives miserable.”
And as the discussion raged on, I decided to tune them all out and catch up on my nap time. Whether Odelia had a girl or a boy, at least that way I was way ahead of the curve.
Just then, the sliding glass door slid back and Gran walked in. That strange billionaire fianc? she’s been hanging out with lately wasn’t with her this time. The man hadn’t exchanged one intelligible word with any of the rest of the family, and all he seemed to do was follow Gran around everywhere, a sort of perpetual smile on his face. He seemed nice enough, but it would be even nicer if he decided to give us the benefit of his conversation.
“Where is everyone?” asked Gran.
“Work,” I said as I adjusted my position on the couch.
And that’s when I saw it.
A dog. In Gran’s arms.
“What’s that, Gran?” asked Dooley, who’d noticed the same curious phenomenon.
“What do you think it is? A dog, of course. Okay, so I’m just going to leave her here,” she said, and deposited the small bundle of fur on the couch right next to us!