“If I were that girl’s mother…” Odelia muttered.
“Yeah, but you’re not,” Chase said. “So shush, Poole.”
She grumbled something as she watched the same assistant who’d ushered the girl in hand Dieber a large box. When he opened the box, she saw to her surprise that it contained none other than… Diego! The cat looked a little annoyed at having been stuck inside a box.
“Isn’t that my mother’s cat?” asked Chase, sounding as surprised as she was.
“It is.”
“Do you like cats?” Dieber asked the girl, who nodded eagerly, her cheeks flushed.
“I love cats!” she squeaked. All that screaming had clearly affected her vocal cords.
“Here you go,” said the singer, and handed her Diego. “Take good care of him.”
“Oh, I will, Charlie!” she squealed, eagerly grabbing the cat. “I’ll love him and cherish him and keep him forever! I’ll feed him the best food and give him cuddles and huggies all day long!”
Odelia studied the girl for a moment.“Do you really like cats?”
“Oh, do I? I love cats! We’ve got twelve of them at the mansion.”
“The mansion?”
“My father is the owner of Feline’s Gold. My family lives in Southampton.”
“Feline’s Gold? The cat food company? The one that produces Cat Snax?”
She nodded enthusiastically.“I love cats. Almost as much as I love Charlie.”
Diego gave Odelia a wink and a grin.“Sorry to leave you, babe, but looks like I just found myself a better deal.”
“Now wait a minute,” Chase said, stepping forward.
“It’s all right, Chase,” said Odelia, placing a hand on his arm.
He frowned.“But that’s Diego.”
“I’m sure he’ll be very happy with this girl,” she said. “What’s your name, honey?”
“Kitty Nala.”
“I’m sure Diego will be very happy with Kitty Nala.”
Diego was still grinning.“Keep that hairy ape away from me, Odelia. I just hit the jackpot! Woo-hoo!”
Odelia leaned in, and whispered into his ear,“See you around, Diego.”
“Fat chance,” he replied. “I’m heading for cat paradise, babes! Adios!”
She stepped back, also smiling, and waved as Kitty Nala left the dressing room with Diego clutched in her arms. Some problems have a way of taking care of themselves, she thought. And this was one problem she was glad she didn’t have to solve.
Dieber’s assistant walked up again and delivered a second box to the singer.
“I want to give you a small token of my appreciation,” he said, fixing Odelia with a sultry stare. “Turns out you saved the day. And even though they weren’t trying to kill me—which came as a great surprise, and a slight disappointment—I still want to thank you.”
“That’s all right,” she said. “Just doing my duty.”
Chase leaned in, and whispered,“You even sound like a cop.”
“Here,” said Charlie, handing her the big box. “From me to you, babe.”
She opened the box and to her surprise found Harriet staring up at her piteously.
The Persian gave a pleading little mewl, then said,“Please take me home, Odelia.”
Odelia placed the box on the floor and pressed her lips together, fury lancing through her.“Charlie Dieber! You can’t gift me a cat that you stole from me in the first place!”
“Oh, dear,” said the pop star, closing his eyes. “Here we go again.”
“This is Harriet! This is my cat!”
“How am I supposed to know who belongs to who?” the star asked with a shrug.
“You’re the worst cat person I’ve ever met in my entire life!” she screamed, her cheeks reddening and her fists clenching and unclenching. “And you’re a lousy singer!”
“Hey, now don’t you go and get personal,” he said, darting worried glances at her fists. He then directed a beseeching look at Chase, hoping the large cop would intervene, just like he had the last time Odelia had flown off the handle. But Chase merely smiled and folded his arms across his chest, clearly prepared to sit this one out.
“If you steal one more cat!” she shouted, wagging a finger in the kid’s face. “One more cat, I swear to God!”
“Okay, all right! Jeezus. What’s with you and cats? They’re just a bunch of stupid animals.”
She hauled off and slapped the singer so hard across the cheek the sound echoed around the dressing room. Charlie’s personal assistant was there, Roulston was there, and so were Regan and the rest of the security guards. None of them interfered when Odelia gave the spoiled brat a slap across the face that he would remember for a long time to come.
“She hit me!” he cried, touching his cheek. “Do something! Arrest her! Shehit me!”
But instead of arresting her, they all smiled and then walked out. On his way out, Roulston leaned into Odelia and murmured,“Been wanting to do that for avery long time.”
Odelia picked up her cat and, after firing off a look that could kill and making the singer wilt, she walked out. To her great satisfaction the imprint of her hand was nicely outlined on Charlie’s face. A small gift from her to him. A token of her lack of appreciation.
Epilogue
After the crazy week we’d had, it was great to see things finally return to normal. To celebrate the conclusion of the Charlie Dieber case—although in actual fact it had turned out to be the Regan Lightbody case, and Charlie Dieber didn’t feature into the affair at all, much to the singer’s dismay—Tex decided to organize one of his fabled barbecues, and so the whole family gathered in Tex and Marge’s backyard that night, to enjoy a nice dinner.
Brutus, Dooley and I had taken up our usual perch on the porch swing, where we had an excellent overview of the proceedings, and Odelia had set out some delicious treats for us—the same meat the humans snacked on, only ours was fully raw, of course.
Why humans want to ruin their food by cooking it is beyond me. Then again, a lot of the things humans do is a cause for head-scratching. Though I usually try not to let the revolting scent of their cooking or grilling interfere with my own enjoyment of the feast.
Harriet, who’d been in seclusion inside the house, finally walked out and joined us.
At first things were a little awkward between us. The last words she’d spoken still rankled. ‘I never want to see you again for as long as I live’ is one of those statements it’s a little hard to walk back on. She was still alive, and she was seeing us right now, so…
She cleared her throat.“Look, you guys. I owe you an apology. I mean…” She cast an apologetic look at Brutus, her former boyfriend. “I guess Diego fooled me.”
“Not for the first time,” Brutus couldn’t help but point out.
I placed a paw on his leg.“Don’t be petty, Brutus. Let’s hear what she has to say.”
“Yeah, the joke is on me, isn’t it?” Harriet said bitterly. “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice…” She sighed, directing a searching look into the distance, beyond the cloud of thick, black smoke wafting up from Tex’s barbecue, a clear indication he was torching his sausages again. “I thought he’d changed his ways, you know,” she said. “He told me he was now a different, better cat. That I brought out the best in him. I guess Diego’s best was not all that good to begin with. When I heard how happy he was to go and live with that Kitty Nala person, and that he didn’t even give a single thought to me—as if I didn’t even exist…”
She brought a distraught paw to her quivering lip, and tears glistened in her eyes.
It was obvious that she hadn’t fully recovered from the terrible episode yet.
“I heard everything, you know. I was in my box but I could hear the whole thing.”
“Oh, sweetness,” said Brutus, sidling closer to her. “Forget about that cat. He isn’t worth a single tear.”
“I know,” she said, nodding hard, then turned her tear-streaked face up to Brutus. “You’re so nice to me, Brutus. Why are you so nice?”