“This is some real Indiana Jones shit, buddy!” I cried enthusiastically.
“Or one of those suicide missions,” he lamented. “Like Star Wars Rogue One. The heroes save the universe and as a reward they get to die at the end.”
“Oh, Dooley,” I muttered. I think if Indiana Jones had had a sidekick like Dooley, he might never have gotten his hands on that Ark of the Covenant.
“We’re going to get stuck up here. We’re going to get stuck and we’re going to die. Archeologists are going to find our mummified corpses a thousand years from now, wondering what the hell we were thinking!”
“We were thinking about our obligation toward Odelia. And for your information, we’re not going to get stuck.”
“How do you know?”
“Because I can already see the light at the end of the tunnel.”
“Don’t go into the light, Max!”
“Why not?”
“Because it means you’re dead.”
“I’m not dead. I can see light coming from somewhere ahead of me.”
“That’s what they all say, and then they’re dead.”
“Look, we’ve got nine lives, right? So have a little faith, buddy.”
“That whole nine lives thing is just an old wives’ tale, Max. I hate to break it to you but when we die, that’s it. We’re not coming back for round two.”
“Can you just… shut up already? You’re not helping.”
“I’m the voice of reason.”
“More like the voice of doom.”
We were in some kind of crawl space between the floors. It was pretty dusty and stuffy in here, but I didn’t mind. I did see light, and I decided to follow it, whatever Dooley said. It led to a small rectangular opening covered with a plastic screen. I gave the screen a nudge and it dropped down into the space beyond. I squeezed my way through and found myself in another dark space, a vertical strip of light directly in front of me. This was the light I’d seen. Not that I needed it. My eyesight is pretty good, thank you very much.
Dooley squeezed in right behind me, and bumped into my butt.
“Where are we?” he whispered.
“Why are you whispering?” I whispered back.
“Because I don’t want to wake up the monster.”
“What monster?”
“The monster in the closet.”
Dooley was right. We were in a closet. Above us, shirts and blazers were hanging from clothes hangers, and on the floor, where we were, a suitcase was placed. So that narrow strip of light in front of us was… the closet door!
“We made it, Dooley!” I cried.
“Made it where?”
“Someone’s closet, just like you said!”
“I didn’t say anything about a closet.”
Outside the closet door, I could hear voices, and I immediately recognized one of them. “Do you hear that?”
Dooley frowned. “Hey, that sounds like Odelia.”
“That’s because it is Odelia, and we’re in a closet in someone’s room.”
I glanced around, trying to figure out whose closet this was. And that’s when I saw it. Right behind Dooley. Chills ran up my feline spine.
“D-D-Dooley. Don’t turn around, but the killer is right behind you!”
“What?!” Dooley cried, whirling around. He yelped in fear when he caught sight of the black-robed figure lurking behind him, a huge meat cleaver in his hands!
“It’s the killer!” I cried. “We found the killer!”
“I was right!” Dooley whimpered. “We’re going to die!”
We tumbled out of the closet, trying to get away as fast as we could. The killer jumped out right behind us, and the meat cleaver clattered to the floor.
I saw Odelia and screamed, “The killer! The killer is right behind us!”
I jumped into her arms, and so did Dooley, and that’s when I saw it wasn’t the killer who’d been inside that closet with us, but only his robe.
Odelia looked surprised, and so did Chase, who was also there. The one who was even more surprised, though, was Dion Dread. And as he stared at us, and at the black robe and the meat cleaver, he cried, “That’s not mine!”
Yeah, right. That’s what they all say.
Embarrassed, I jumped down from Odelia’s arms. Indiana Jones would never jump into anyone’s arms. Indiana Jones would face the danger head-on. And now that I’d discovered we’d been spooked by a robe, I was ready to do just that.
“Wait, what is Dion doing here?” asked Dooley. “Isn’t he supposed to be down in the spa getting a massage?”
“I guess his massage ended.”
“See, Max?” asked Dooley. “We should have just waited it out.”
“If we hadn’t climbed that pipe we wouldn’t have found the killer!”
“It isn’t a killer. It’s just an old robe and a cleaver.”
“Duh. That’s the murder weapon, Dooley, and the killer’s bloody robe.”
Dooley yelped, only now understanding we’d caught the killer, and he was here in the room with us. We both stared at Dion, the brutal murderer.
Just then, Brutus came barging through the door, a little winded, and cried, “Odelia! Dion Dread is planning his own reality show!” He caught sight of us, and his eyes went wide. “Oh, shoot.”
Chase took one look at the cleaver and the black robe, still crusted with blood, and his jaw clenched. He stepped up to Dion Dread, flicked a pair of handcuffs from his belt, and announced, “Dion Dread. You’re under arrest for the murder of Shana Kenspeckle.”
“But I didn’t do it! That stuff ain’t mine! Someone planted it there!”
“You have the right to remain silent,” Chase grunted, and marched Dion out of the room.
“Hey! I can’t go out there in just my towel!”
“Anything you say may be used against you in a court of law.”
Harriet now came traipsing into the room. "What's with all the screaming?"
“We found the killer,” I announced proudly.
“You certainly did,” said Odelia, crouching down and giving me a rub.
Harriet frowned at her boyfriend. “Brutus? I’ve been looking all over for you. Where were you?”
He tried to look as innocently as he could. “Oh, just hanging out.”
“He locked us up in the basement!” Dooley cried accusingly.
“Yeah, and he tried to give our scoop to Odelia,” I added.
“Oh, Brutus,” Harriet said, shaking her head. “I told you, this is not the way to win friends and influence people. This is the way to make enemies.”
“They started first!” he said. “They’re trying to cut me out.”
"Nobody is trying to cut you out of anything, Brutus," said Odelia. She gave Dooley and me a stern look. "Look, it's really great that you guys managed to find the murder weapon and the murderer's robe, but you have to learn to get along with Brutus. I think it's high time you all became friends."
We stared at Brutus, and he stared back at us, defiant.
“I want you to shake paws and apologize,” Odelia told me.
“Me? Apologize to him? What for?”
“Come on, Max. You know you haven’t been very nice to Brutus.”
“Me? Not nice to him? He’s not being nice to me!”
“Look, I don’t want to hear any more. You’ll apologize and be friends from now on. And you, Brutus, I want to hear an apology from you as well. Max has told me about your behavior, and it’s unacceptable. Is that clear?”
Now that was more like it. Brutus looked like he was about to refuse, but Harriet placed her paw on his back and he finally relented, hanging his head. “Oh, all right. I’m sorry, Max, for the way I’ve behaved. It was wrong of me.”
“And I’m sorry for the way I’ve behaved,” I said when Odelia cut her eyes to me and gave me a warning look. “I should have been much nicer to you.”
We reluctantly walked up to each other and slapped our paws together.
“Now tell him you’ll be friends, Max,” said Odelia.
“Friends?” I asked.
Brutus nodded. “Friends.”
Just then, Chase stuck his head through the door. “We have to lock up this room. This is now a crime scene.” He stared down at the gathering of cats, and shook his head. “Your cats caught the killer, Poole. Amazing.”