“You should have asked me before you hired these… these… this wrecking crew!”
“They’re not a wrecking crew. They’re builders. And they’re very good builders. The contractor is Scarlett’s cousin’s neighbor’s mother-in-law’s brother’s best friend, and he comes highly recommended. He’s also dirt cheap. Besides, we talked about this, remember? And you said it was fine.”
“I didn’t say it was fine! I said I was going to discuss it with Tex!”
Dad stood eyeing the destruction with a dazed look on his face. “Where is my television?” he asked in a strangled voice. “What did they do to my television?”
“Is that all you have to say!” Mom demanded.
“Don’t you worry about a thing,” said Gran. “All of our stuff is safely stored.”
“Where? Where is it stored?” Mom demanded.
“I’m not sure, but Piotr assured me it’s all stored away safe and sound. And cheap.”
“Piotr? Is that the name of the contractor?” asked Odelia.
“Yeah, Piotr Krakowska.”
“Oh, dear God,” said Mom, looking as if she was either on the verge of crying or about to strangle Gran. Dad was apoplectic, which showed in a general sense of dazedness.
“How long is this going to take?” asked Odelia.
“Well, that depends,” said Gran.
“Depends!” Mom cried.
“Yeah, best-case scenario? Three weeks. Worst-case scenario, three months.”
“But where are we going to live!”
They all turned to look at Odelia.
“Oh, no,” said Odelia. “I don’t have space for three extra people.”
“Well, your grandmother can sleep on the couch,” said Mom savagely.
“We don’t have to sleep on any couches,” said Gran. “Our bedrooms are perfectly fine to sleep in. This is a kitchen remodel, people, not a home renovation!”
Just then, there was a loud creaking sound, and suddenly before their very eyes the entire upper floor suddenly crashed down on the lower floor in a cloud of dust!
“Oh, my God!” Mom cried.
“Now how did that happen?” asked Gran curiously.
Just then, Odelia’s phone chimed, and automatically she picked it out of her jeans back pocket. “Yeah?” she said without looking to see who it was.
“Babe? We got him!”
“Who got what?”
“The killer! We went through Karl Bunyon’s house with a fine-tooth comb and we found the gun!”
“Gun?”
“Babe, are you all right? You sound a little… off.”
“Mom and Dad’s house just died, Chase,” she intoned. “It’s dead now.”
There was a pause, then Chase said, “I’m coming.”
And he did. Five minutes later he was standing right next to them as they all stared at what was left of the house, which wasn’t a lot.
“What happened?” asked Chase.
“I’m not sure,” said Odelia. “One minute the house was fine, the next it was gone.”
“This is just a minor setback,” said Gran. “I’ll call Piotr and tell him to fix things.”
“Fix things!” Dad suddenly screamed. “Vesta, the whole house is gone!”
“No need to shout, Tex,” said Gran, rubbing her ear. “I’m sure it’s an easy fix.”
It rarely happens that you’re treated to the sight of two grown-ups crying, but that’s what happened just then: both Odelia’s parents suddenly burst into tears.
“Well,” said Chase. “I guess I better start getting that guest room ready, huh?”
And as Odelia and Chase removed themselves from the scene, leaving Gran to call her contractor, and Mom and Dad to gently weep, Odelia said, “What was that you said about a gun?”
“Oh, right. Guess what? We found a gun safe in Karl Bunyon’s office. And inside we found… the murder weapon!”
“The gun that killed our John Doe?”
“Exactly! So it’s case closed. Karl Bunyon killed John Doe, and buried him in the woods.”
“But why? And who is John Doe?”
“No idea,” said Chase, as he started moving his workout equipment to a corner of the guest bedroom. “He’s not talking. I placed him under arrest, advised him of his rights, and he’s taking the right to remain silent pretty seriously. All he wanted to impress upon me is that he’s innocent, and that there must be some kind of terrible mistake.”
“What mistake?”
Chase shrugged. “Beats me.”
“You’re sure this is the same weapon?”
“One hundred percent. The bullet that killed John Doe was fired from Karl Bunyon’s gun. No doubt about it.”
“And the gun was in his gun safe.”
“Karl’s fingerprints are on the gun, the gun was in his gun safe, and the gun safe was locked with a combination lock.”
“What’s the combination?”
“The guy’s birthday.”
“Anyone else have access to the safe? The wife… or the daughter?”
“I suppose. Now where am I going to put this thing?”
He was referring to the weightlifting machine he used to train his chest and back muscles. It weighed a ton, and even though it was placed in a corner of the room, and rarely used these days since Chase preferred to do his workouts at the gym, it took up a lot of space.
“You know what? When those builders come in tomorrow, I’ll ask them to take this thing out.” He gave his wife a cheerful grin. “For some reason I have a feeling we’re going to need this room to double as a guest bedroom a lot more than as a home gym.”
Chapter 24
The next morning we were all lounging lazily in Odelia’s office. At home things were a little hectic, with Gran and Marge and Tex suddenly moving in, and the house next door having been reduced to rubble, and so the only little bit of peace and quiet we could find was in our human’s office.
The contractor, when he finally turned up early that morning, had uttered the key word to explain why the house had suddenly decided to collapse. This word was ‘load-bearing wall.’ Okay, so that’s three words, but bear with me. He also uttered a second key word and this was ‘support beam.’ Okay, fine, that’s two words. “Darn it,” the man had said in a strong Polish accent, or at least I assumed it was Polish, “I knew I should have put in those support beams before I took out those two load-bearing walls.”
And that’s how you learn new words from time to time. Pity it was at the expense of Marge and Tex’s nice house, and incidentally Dooley’s, and also Brutus’s and Harriet’s.
Well, at least there was still Odelia’s home, and since Odelia had already ruled out any kitchen remodels taking place in her home, I think for now we were safe.
Suddenly a woman walked into Odelia’s office. I recognized her as Kathleen Bunyon, and I had a feeling I knew just what she was going to say even before she said it.
“Miss Poole!” she said, sounding a little breathless as she took a seat. “My husband has been arrested by your husband!”
It’s one of those things you don’t hear very often, just like the words ‘supporting beam’ and ‘load-bearing wall.’
“Yeah, I know,” said Odelia. “And I’m very sorry, Mrs. Bunyon. Looks like the gun that killed the person we found in the woods belonged to your husband.”
“But that’s impossible!” said Kathleen Bunyon as she tightly gripped her purse in her lap. “My husband is not a killer, Miss Poole—he simply isn’t! Can’t you do something?”
“I’m afraid I can’t.”
“But he didn’t do it—I swear. And now he’ll definitely lose his kids. His ex-wife will use this to yank his visitation rights so fast…” She shook her head in utter dismay.
“Is there anyone else who had access to that gun?” asked Odelia. “Your daughter, maybe?”
“No. Karl always keeps that safe locked up tight.”