“You do realize that dogs have fleas?”
Harriet glanced at Rufus, a horrified look in her eyes.“Fleas!”
“Yeah, it’s natural for all dogs to have fleas and other parasites. There’s nothing vets can do about it either. They treat them and a couple of days later they’re full of the annoying little bugs again. They’re used to it, too. Isn’t that right, Rufus?”
“Unfortunately, yes,” said Rufus, following Max’s lead. “I’m at a point in my life where they don’t bother me anymore. I’ve simply learned to live with them over the years.”
“Why didn’t you tell me!” Harriet demanded, suddenly jumping up as if the ground had bitten her.
“They do jump over to cats you know,” said Max, “and they are a lot more annoying for us than they are for dogs.”
“Get them off me!” Harriet cried. “Brutus, get them off! I can feel them crawling all over me!”
“Oh, dear,” said Brutus softly as he gave a curious glance in Max’s direction.
“Also, if I were you I wouldn’t eat from Rufus’s bowl,” Max added.
“And why not? Kibble is kibble,” said Harriet.
“Because they put something in dog kibble that’s very healthy for dogs but lethal for cats.”
“Lethal!” Harriet cried.
“Yeah, it’s called dognip. Dogs are crazy about it, just like cats are crazy about catnip. Only it does something nasty to our digestive system. Very nasty, indeed.”
“Dognip! I didn’t even know that dognip existed!”
“Oh, it does,” said Max.
“It stands to reason, sugar pumpkin,” said Brutus. “That’s why the dog food aisle is different from the cat food aisle. If dogs could eat cat food and vice versa, they wouldn’t have to sell it in different packaging now would they?”
“I always thought dog kibble was the same as cat kibble!” said Harriet, who’d plunked down on the lawn and was frantically scratching herself behind the ears. “Brutus! Come over here. Get rid of this flea. I swear it’s biting me in the neck!”
“Of course, twinkle toes,” said Brutus, and got busy plucking the imaginary flea from his true love’s fur. And since Harriet had a lot of fur, it was going to take him a little time.
Rufus flashed a quick grin to Max when Harriet and Brutus weren’t looking, and mouthed, ‘Thank you!’
And Max mouthed back,‘You’re welcome!’
25
“I’m sorry, sweetie,” said Alec, not for the first time. He and Charlene were in bed watching a Netflix rom-com, and Alec still felt bad about his mother’s behavior.
“It’s fine,” said Charlene, patting her boyfriend’s arm. “I’m sure she won’t do it again.”
“No, I’m sure she will do it again, but I also want you to know that if she does, you have to tell me immediately and I’ll make sure she gets a good telling-off.”
“You think she’s going to persist with this nonsense of the building permit?”
“You don’t know my mother. Once she gets an idea into her head, there’s no removing it, not even with a crowbar.”
“Well, if she approaches me again with an offer of fifty thousand bucks for a permit, I’ll tell her to ask you instead. How does that sound?”
“That sounds like something she’ll take in her stride and she’ll come right back at you with some other cockamamie idea.”
“Your mother really is something else,” said Charlene with a grin.
For a few moments they followed the exploits on TV, but it didn’t do all that much to keep Alec’s attention riveted to the screen, for a few moments later he said, “Honey?”
“Mh?”
“Does my mother’s behavior… give you second thoughts?”
“Second thoughts?”
“About us, I mean.”
She glanced over.“What are you talking about?”
“Well, now that you know what kind of crazy family I have, do you think that maybe… you regret getting involved with me?” he finished, giving her a rueful look.
Much to his surprise, she burst out laughing.“Alec, sweetheart, I knew exactly what I was getting when I got involved with you. I know Vesta, remember? In fact I’ve known her for years. You don’t get to be mayor of this town without knowing pretty much all of its constituents, and frankly Vesta is the kind of constituent you ignore at your peril.”
“So you knew what you were getting into and you still…”
“Decided to go through with it? I didn’t hesitate for a second, sweetie. Not one second. Look, Vesta Muffin is a cross all of Hampton Cove collectively has to bear, and besides, she’s not as bad as all that. She means well. She always does. It’s just that she has a very special way of accomplishing what she wants, consequences be damned.”
“She does mean well,” Alec admitted.
“Like now with this permit. She wants to make her family some extra money by renting out apartments. And when you get right down to it, what’s wrong with that?”
“It’s wrong because she can’t just build whatever she wants wherever she wants to build it—and also, my sister doesn’t want to open her house to a bunch of strangers.”
“Well, sure, that’s the bad part, but her intentions are good.”
“Her intentions are always good,” said Alec ruefully.
“Look, between you and me, and the rest of your family, I think we can handle one little old lady, wouldn’t you agree?”
He emitted a deep sigh. “I hope so,” he said finally.
“Why? What do you know that I don’t?”
“Oh, just that she started a watch war.”
“A watch war? What are you talking about?”
“Wilbur Vickery and Father Reilly have also launched a neighborhood watch, and Vesta doesn’t like the competition, so last night she rear-ended Wilbur’s car. And I have a feeling that’s just the beginning.”
Charlene gave him a kiss on the cheek.“We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. And now let me watch this next part. It’s the best bit of the whole movie.”
Alec would have said that no part of any rom-com could ever be called a best part, but since Charlene loved these kinds of movies, he sank down on the pillow, and watched her enjoy it. And when she laughed out loud at the funny bit, he smiled, too. He wondered not for the first time what he’d done to deserve a woman like her.
[Êàðòèíêà: img_2]
Vesta and Scarlett were patrolling the streets of their town again, as was their habit of an evening, and this time they had a very particular objective in mind: the Hampton Heisters were still at large, and so Vesta had decided that the watch was going to bring them to justice.
Scarlett had her doubts about this lofty goal, but it wouldn’t be the first time that Vesta got what Vesta wanted, so she figured she might as well go along with it.
Vesta’s little red Peugeot had been fixed in record time, and once again declared fit for duty, and tonight they were patrolling the area where the rich and famous lived. It was a narrow strip of prime real estate along the beach, where actors and singers and businesspeople had built large and impressive McMansions, and it was along here that the Hampton Heisters had struck six times in a row, and it was only to be expected that soon they’d strike again, attracted by all the wealth that was on display there.
“Don’t you think that with one of their crew in prison they might give up?” asked Scarlett as they slowly cruised along the boulevard that connected the large mansions. Not that they could actually see those mansions, since they were mostly hidden from view behind large fences and tall hedgesat the end of long and winding driveways.
“I don’t think they’re going to be stopped by a little thing like that,” said Vesta. “These people are obviously addicted to the thrill of breaking into the homes of the celebrities they admire.”
“Admire? That isn’t the word that comes to mind when I think of this gang.”
“Of course they admire them, Scarlett. They collect their memorabilia, don’t they?”
“Probably to sell online.”