“Nothing,” said Gran. “He’s just hungry.”
“Hungry for frogs!” Dooley yelled.
“Cats,” said Gran with a shrug. “You know what they’re like. Always wanting to eat.”
“You know, one day I would like to be able to talk to them,” said Scarlett. “I have a feeling they’d be able to tell me a lot of interesting things.”
“Keep dreaming, babe. That’ll never happen.”
“I know, but it would be nice.”
“Kiss more frogs!” Dooley said. “A frog a day keeps the doctor away!”
Suddenly Scarlett frowned.“Did someone just mention… frogs?”
Gran blinked, Odelia uttered a startled cry, and Marge said“Eep!”
“Hey,” said Dooley. “I think Scarlett just understood what I said.”
“You know, Dooley,” I said, studying Gran’s friend with unabashed curiosity, “I think she just did.”
“Why am I suddenly thinking about kissing frogs?” Scarlett asked. “So weird.”
35. PURRFECT CRUISE
1
The ship was huge. In fact it was huger than huge. It was ginormous. Of course I’d seen ships like this before… on TV, but never with my own eyes as I was doing now.
“This ship is really big, Max,” said Dooley, indicating we were on the same page as far as the ship’s size was concerned.
“I know,” I said, still gaping up at the monstrosity.
“Are you sure it’s not going to sink? It looks very heavy to me.”
“I’m… pretty sure,” I said, though now that my friend mentioned it, I had to confess I couldn’t for the life of me imagine how a monstrosity like this could possibly stay afloat. Or stay upright, for that matter. There were so many floors to the thing I couldn’t count them all, and theQueen of the Seas looked more like some gigantic hotel than a boat.
“I don’t know if this is such a good idea, Max,” said Dooley, shaking his head as we took stock of our home for the next ten days. “Maybe Harriet and Brutus were right when they decided not to come on this trip.”
“Harriet and Brutus didn’t decide not to come, Dooley,” I reminded him. “They weren’t invited.”
“Oh. But why?”
“Because dragging two cats around on a cruise ship is more than plenty, thank you very much,” Odelia said as she crouched down next to us. “Why? Are you missing your friends already?”
“No,” I said quickly. “No, it’s not that. It’s just that…”
“Are you sure this boat won’t sink, Odelia?” asked Dooley. “Boats do sink, you know.”
Odelia smiled and patted my friend on the head.“Pretty sure, Dooley. It’s been traveling along the same route for the past fifteen years, and hasn’t sunk yet.”
“Okay,” said my friend, but looked nor sounded convinced. “So how does it stay afloat? A boat this big should be at the bottom of the ocean, not floating on top of it.”
“It’s been built by some of the brightest engineers and shipbuilders on the planet,” said our human. “So rest assured, it won’t sink. Now are you ready to go aboard?”
We both gulped profusely, then nodded reluctantly.
“Great. Then let’s go.”
And she picked up Dooley and carried him off.
“Hey!” I said. “What about me?!”
But the moment I’d spoken these words, two strong arms picked me up and soon I was being carried aboard, too. The strong arms belonged to Odelia’s husband Chase Kingsley, and since the man is basically built like a tank, I soon relaxed in his arms and allowed him to carry me aboard the vessel.
We were in Bridgeport, Barbados, where the Queen of the Seas was about to set sail on a ten-day cruise that would take us along all the hotspots of the Caribbean. Odelia and Chase, having been married a couple of weeks before, still hadn’t been able to enjoy their honeymoon, and so their families had decided to do something to rectify this gross oversight, and had arranged for this cruise. Some insurance money had come in after the accidental demolition of Odelia’s parents’ house, and Odelia’s boss had also chipped in, as had her uncle Alec Lip, and even Alec’s girlfriend, Mayor Charlene Butterwick. All in all they’d done a wonderful thing for the newlyweds, and Odelia and Chase were still blown away by this singular kindness.
We’d flown from New York to Barbados, and now here we were, boarding one of the most luxurious cruise ships in the world, to spend the next ten days on the water.
The trip would take us from Bridgeport, Barbados to Kingstown, St. Vincent, then on to St. George’s, Grenada and Willemstad, Curacao, into Kralendijk, Bonaire, and Colombia, Panama, Costa Rica, Aruba, Trinidad and back to Bridgeport for our flight home.
The ship itself was even more impressive than I’d imagined standing ashore: once we got past the ticket person, and had entered the ship proper, we were hit by a tornado of sights and sounds: people were everywhere, and so was the music blasting from hidden speakers. A shopping mall had been set up in the belly of the beast, with plenty of boutiques, and as I glanced up I saw floor after floor of ship rising up around us—as if we were at the bottom of a canyon. For a moment I felt seriously overwhelmed. So I held onto my human with all my might, which may or may not have involved the use of my claws, for suddenly Chase uttered a soft strangled cry and muttered, “Claws, Max.”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” I said, and retracted my claws and tried to relax.
“Let’s find our cabin first,” Odelia suggested.
“Good idea,” Chase grunted as he carefully set me down on the ship’s metal floor. Odelia offered Dooley the same courtesy, and we both vowed to stay close to our humans. If we ever got lost I wasn’t sure what we’d do. Look for the Lost and Found department, presumably?
“This looks just like one big giant hotel,” Odelia said, marveling at our surroundings.
“A hotel and a shopping mall,” Chase said as we looked in on some of the shops.
“I can’t wait to see the pool,” said Odelia happily as she checked out a bathing suit and Chase eyed a cowboy hat with some interest.
The honeymooners shared a sweet kiss. I looked away, of course, as I always do out of respect for their privacy. But Dooley, who didn’t have the same qualms, eyed the kissing couple with breathless anticipation. “They’re making babies, Max,” he said in hushed tones.
“Shh—they can hear you,” I said.
Our humans had finally been able to resist the allure of the colorful shops, and we arrived at the bank of elevators destined to whisk us away to the upper floors. Soon we arrived at our designated level and the doors zoomed open, spilling us and several other giddy tourists into the section of the ship that would be our new home for the next ten days.
“I hope they have plenty of kibble,” said Dooley.
“And I hope they have a soft couch to sleep on,” I added.
“I wonder if they have a gym,” Chase grunted.
“And I hope they have that bathing suit in my size,” Odelia said.
We found our cabin without fail, and after Chase had let us in with the key card he’d received, it proved as spacious and nice as the pictures on the cruise line website had promised, and much to my relief it contained a very nice couch, which immediately I took possession of, as did Dooley. It was soft yet firm and deep enough so I could fit whichever way I chose to stretch out on it. I’m a large cat, you see, and I need my space.
After the ordeal of traveling to Barbados by plane, then taxi, and after having gone through the experience of our arrival and undergoing the noise of the crowd, the peace and quiet of the cabin was like a balm to my harried soul, and I expelled a sigh of relief.
Odelia and Chase were too busy checking out the cabin and uttering cries of delight to take much notice of us, and after they’d inspected the bedroom, the bathroom and the balcony they both collapsed on the bed in a flutter of giggles and for the next five minutes spent more time kissing and hugging and generally doing what newlyweds do.
“They’re making babies, Max!” Dooley repeated his earlier statement. “It’s happening!”