[Êàðòèíêà: img_2]
Uncle Alec opened his eyes. He discovered to his surprise that he’d fallen asleep. He’d been lying on his side on the hard floor and had been sure he’d never be able to find sleep, but somehow his tired body had taken over and shut down for a refreshing nap.
He didn’t feel all that refreshed, though. More as if he’d been put on the rack. He got up and stretched his sore limbs, and saw that Elon in the cell across from him had the same idea.
“And?” Elon asked, a vague hope in his voice. “Any ideas on how to get us out of here?”
“None,” said Alec.
“Hey, you’re the chief of police, man. You’re paid to come up with ideas.”
“Well, I’m sorry to say I’m not a professional escape artist, all right?”
“You don’t have to bite my nose off. I’m just saying. If you can’t get us out of here, who can? I’m just a shelf stacker who got lucky and won Mega Millions.” He glanced over to the third prisoner, still tucked away in his cell right next to Alec.
“Don’t look at me,” Bertie grumbled. “I’m just an insurance broker who got unlucky when his wife decided to favor a hairy bald traveling salesman over her husband.”
In spite of their predicament, Alec laughed.“How can a man be hairy and bald at the same time?”
“Trust me, it’s possible,” grunted Bertie.
They were all silent for a beat, and Alec frowned when he focused on the noise that seemed to be coming from behind the door to his left.“Do you guys hear that?” he asked.
“Sounds like cats,” said Elon.
“Yeah, cats,” Alec confirmed. “And a lot of them.”
Suddenly a bear of a man wearing a mask passed by their cells, put his ear to the door where the caterwauling was coming from, then pounded the door with his fist. “Shut up, you stupid creatures!” The cats ignored his instructions, for the caterwauling continued in full force. “Stupid animals,” the man muttered, then gave the door a kick with his booted foot for good measure and walked away.
“Hey, buddy,” said Elon. “How long are you going to keep us down here?”
“Yeah, I’m hungry,” said Bertie. “When are you going to feed us again?”
But the man didn’t even deign them with a response. He simply walked off and quickly disappeared from view, his feet slapping up what sounded like stone steps.
“He doesn’t look like a serial killer,” said Elon.
“And how would you know what a serial killer looks like?” said Alec.
“No, I mean, he doesn’t give off that serial killer vibe.”
“I think the mask tells it all,” said Bertie.
“What does it tell?” asked Elon.
“Well, if he really wanted to kill us, in a serial-killer way, I mean, would he be wearing that mask? I don’t think so.”
‘You’re absolutely right,” said Elon. “That mask tells a story. That mask tells us that he doesn’t want to be recognized, and if he really was planning to kill us, he wouldn’t be afraid of being recognized, ergo he’s not planning to kill us but only going to keep us here for a while and then…” He broke off, and frowned deeply. “Um…”
“And then what?” asked Alec. “Do you really think he abducted us just for the heck of it, and locked us down here just so he could let us go at some point? Think again, bud.”
“You don’t have to be such a negative Nelly, buddy,” said Elon, looking hurt. “I’m just trying to keep the atmosphere light and pleasant, you know, for all our sakes.”
“It’s always possible he’s a shy serial killer, though,” said Bertie. “Which would explain the mask. Or maybe he has some sort of facial deformity. The whole cats thing worries me, though. It’s just like a serial killer to have some sort of weird cat fixation.”
“Oh, my god, don’t you see!” said Elon.
“See what?” asked Alec, who was starting to wonder when the comedy double act he was locked up with would stop talking and let him think.
“That’s what’s going on here! Some kind of secret government experiment. There’s us, in here, and the cats, in there, and…” He frowned, and Alec thought he could actually see steam pouring from the poor guy’s ears. But then he deflated. “Nah,” he said. “I thought I was onto something, but it’s gone.”
“Look, you keep forgetting that I saw his face,” said Alec. “So I don’t know why he would wear a mask, since I already know what he looks like. Plus, since I was talking to the guy when I got knocked out, he’s got an accomplice who’s very handy with a club.”
“Food for thought,” said Elon, nodding. “You’re giving me a lot to work with, chief.”
[Êàðòèíêà: img_2]
“What’s taking them so long?” asked Harriet irritably.
“I’m sure they’re talking to Odelia right now,” said Brutus. “And then Odelia will call Chase, and before you know it they will come charging in here and set us all free.”
“I’m not so sure,” said Clarice. “Harriet is right. They should have been here by now. How long has it been? An hour? Two? Even cats as slow as Max and Dooley should have made the trip and returned by now.”
“See?” said Harriet. “Clarice thinks I’m right. And you know Clarice, Brutus. Clarice knows. Clarice is smart. Clarice has been through stuff. So when she says it’s taking them too long, she knows what she’s talking about.”
“I haven’t been in thisexact type of situation, if that’s what you’re saying,” said Clarice.
“No, I don’t mean to… I mean… not to make you feel…” She laughed helplessly.
Brutus stared at his mate. He’d never seen Harriet lost for words before, or flustered. Either their current surroundings were having an adverse effect on her, or she was actually feeling intimidated by Clarice. Which was very well possible, of course. After all, he felt intimidated by Clarice practically all of the time and today was no exception.
“I think the only solution will be to claw our way out of this one,” said Clarice now, paying no attention to Harriet’s weird ramblings. She’d been eyeing the door and now walked over. Harriet and Brutus followed her.
“What do you mean, claw our way out?” asked Brutus.
“What do you think I mean, musclehead?” She pointed to the door. “What do you see?”
“Um… a door?” said Brutus.
“And next to the door?”
“Um… the wall?”
“Oh, God,” Clarice groaned. “You wouldn’t survive a day in the wild. See those hinges? They’re only kept in place with a prayer and a whisper.”
“A prayer… and a whisper?” asked Harriet.
“Just give me a paw, will you?” grunted Clarice, and dug a formidable claw into the lowest hinge. Immediately a large chunk of old and rotten cement dropped out.
Brutus exchanged a look of confusion with Harriet. They still didn’t see it.
“That door is hinged,” said Clarice. “But when we do this…” She removed another thick piece of cement. “It becomes unhinged, see?”
Harriet laughed a nervous little laugh.“I think Clarice is becoming unhinged,” she whispered in Brutus’s ear.
“I heard that,” said Clarice. “Now are you going to give me a paw or what?”
And then Brutus suddenly saw the light.“If those hinges drop out…” he said slowly.
“The door drops out!” said Harriet. “That’s brilliant, Clarice.”
“Simple physics,” said Clarice.
“Shanille! Guys!” Harriet shouted. “Come here a minute, will you?”
In a few words Clarice explained the plan, and soon a dozen cats were working away at those old hinges, scraping off cement and rust and working like good little beavers.