Sometimes, it’s almost like I can hear a horse’s voice. This one time, I could tell a mare was sick because she kept rubbing her head against mine and whinnying. Turns out she had an infection that could’ve made her go blind. And I caught it just in time.
“Why are you so skittish?”
I stand there with Star while he grazes and stare up at the sky, praying to Mom. Is she up there listening to me? I pray that even though Star did bad in his race today, I get the job.
All of a sudden, Star’s tail starts whipping around and his ears lay back. He’s nervous or angry.
“Hi,” Jack calls out, waving from outside the fence, his hounds running circles around him. Jack looks comfortable in a T-shirt, track pants, and a baseball cap turned around backward. A good outfit to curl up in on a Sunday night.
Star pins his ears. Does the horse not like Jack, or is it the three rambunctious dogs at his side? I’d hate to tell Jack that his horse doesn’t like him.
“Can we talk?” Jack asks.
Nodding, I pat Star’s neck and exit the pasture.
“You did really well today.” The fresh smells of Jack’s cotton T-shirt and soap waft up to my nose, luring me into a trance. His eyes are bright sapphires under the moon.
“I’m sorry he didn’t win. I can’t believe it, honestly.”
“Me neither. He did better in your warm-up than he did in the damned race.” Jack purses his lips and looks at the next pasture over, where mares are grazing with their young. “We should probably get the horses inside.”
Jack and I mount Appaloosa ponies and herd the horses toward the barns. A rush of happiness fills me when he gently coaxes a yearling into his stall. I love how he respects and takes care of his animals, and his fluid riding skills show he’s a true horseman. The stars glitter against the deep purple sky. It feels like it’s just me and Jack for miles and miles.
Much too soon, the horses are safe and cozy in their stalls, and I have no excuse to spend more time with him.
“Lock that gate,” he calls.
“Yes, sir.” I finish the chore and meet back up with Jack.
“Don’t call me sir.”
“Aren’t you the boss?” I tease.
He scratches the back of his neck, looking pained all of a sudden. “I’m probably gonna score a big fat F on this test.”
“Why do you say that? Everyone respects you.” Gael told me a story about when Jack was fifteen and his father was out of town and couldn’t be reached, Gael was wrestling with whether to euthanize a prized gelding that broke his femur on the track. Jack made the call to put the suffering horse down.
“I don’t know who’d buy a horse I breed considering how bad Star’s turned out.”
“He’s a fast horse,” I reply. “He just has some growing up to do.”
“He should be better than this. He’s bred from the Man o’ War and Nasrullah lines.”
“He just got a bad start out of the gate.”
“Star’s been gate-trained a couple times already.” We’re standing so close, I can count the freckles on his nose. See the flecks of gray in his blue eyes. “I love Star, but my father thinks I should sell him to recoup some of the cost. Cut my losses.”
A memory of Moonshadow roars into my thoughts. Moonshadow bucking and squealing, trying to get away from strange men she didn’t know, trying to get back to me. I swallow hard and try to focus on the present.
“Please don’t sell Star,” I say quietly. “Crotchety as he is, I like him.”
“It’s a good thing I’m the boss right now ’cause I can’t sell him. I can’t fail on my first big stud fee deal. Nobody will respect me as an owner…Maybe your workouts with Star will get him in shape for the race at Keeneland next weekend.”
I move closer to Jack, getting in his space just like pushy Star. “Does this mean I got the exercise rider job?”
He steps closer, invading my space this time. “I think it’s pretty obvious you’ve got the job.”
“Yay!” I squeal and jump into his arms, wrapping my arms around his neck. My heart swells at the trust Jack is putting in me. He clears his throat and I immediately let go, mortified. “I’m sorry.”
He gently pats my shoulder. “So we’ll see you tomorrow morning, then?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Stop calling me sir.” He laughs softly and gazes into my eyes, and it feels like everything stops. The wind stops rustling the grass. We both stop breathing. The only thing that keeps on are the twinkling stars.
Heat floods my body as he takes a step closer and gently pushes me against the white fence. “Hey,” he says. His fingertips graze my cheek. He stares at my lips, setting me on fire. Holy shit, what is happening!
I grab his shoulders to hold myself up, breathing hard, inhaling a mix of honeysuckle and soap. The fence scrapes against my back. What would Jack say if someone caught us here?
I push him away before anything happens.
“What’s wrong?” he murmurs, as if in a daze, locking his hands around my waist.
“Jack, no.”
At the word no he jerks his hands away and holds them up. “Wow, you really don’t want to kiss me, eh?”
“You’re my boss.”
His eyes flutter open wide and he takes a step back. “Shit, I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.”
Of course he wasn’t thinking. He doesn’t have to worry about what other people would say. “Why is the rich, gorgeous Jack Goodwin kissing a girl like her? He must be using her because she works at Cedar Hill. She’s convenient.” He doesn’t have to worry about his father getting fired if he’s caught kissing me. On top of that, after he badmouthed Abby Winchester today, he let her hug him! So how can I trust anything he says? Just like all rich people.
Jack nervously scratches his nose. “I’m sorry. Can we pretend this never happened? My dad’ll be pissed at me.”
Without a word, I abandon Jack by the pasture, haul ass back to Hillcrest, and rush into my shoebox of a room, slamming the door shut behind me, rattling the picture of my mother hanging by the door. I reach my bed in two steps and collapse.
Jack Goodwin just tried to kiss me!
It’s not that I’m nervous about the prospect of hooking up. I’ve fooled around before—I even had a regular thing going with this guy Adam. We almost slept together once, but not even the cheap wine coolers we drank before made it feel right. I want my first time to be with someone I love and respect.
I cradle my stuffed bear. If I’d stayed out by the pasture, if I hadn’t pushed Jack away, he would’ve kissed me.
And I’m not sure what I think about that.
I have five days to get Star in shape for his next race.
If he doesn’t win this time, there’s a good chance Mr. Goodwin will convince Jack to sell him, and I can’t let that happen. Not again.
So, on Monday morning before school, I meet Gael for my first day of work as an exercise rider at Cedar Hill.
“Congratulations on the job, drama mama.”
I give him my death glare as he gives me my schedule. I’m to take Minerva, Star, and Echoes of Summer out for exercise. I will ride each horse for about twenty minutes before handing the horse off to a hot-walker to cool down before it gets a bath and food.
First I take Minerva out onto the track, warm her up, then turn the other direction and race around the turf to avoid a traffic jam with other riders warming up.
When I’m just getting finished with Minerva, Jack appears on the edge of the track, riding Wrigley. He pulls his cowboy hat off, waves it at the staff, and puts it back on. Most guys my age would still be sleeping at 5:30 a.m., but Jack’s up early to see what’s happening on the track and in the barns.