FRISCH: Herr Director, there’s no reason we can’t discuss this calmly. Let me tell you why I need more money, and why I believe the firm can pay it. If you disagree, I only ask that you try to explain your reasons.
THE BOSS: Reasons, oh, please. The money I pay my employees is my concern. You know I have a perfectly good sense of what my people want, so don’t annoy me with that.
FRISCH: But why, Herr Director? You have always trusted me, and we did handle the last round of negotiations together. All I want is for you to allow me to trust you enough to talk about my concerns. Is that unreasonable?
THE BOSS: Alright then, fine, go ahead. I can hardly blame you. I too would like very much to make more money. Who wouldn’t? Everyone does.
FRISCH: Yes sir, I couldn’t agree more. For starters, I need to make more than I do now.
THE BOSS: How much do you make?
FRISCH: 350 pre-tax.
THE BOSS: Well, that’s a big chunk of money!
FRISCH: I don’t think it’s enough for the head bookkeeper in a firm like ours to keep up appearances.
THE BOSS: Why? Who cares how you look?
FRISCH: Don’t say that. If the people from Zwickau come today, they’ll have a very good look at every one of us. They notice everything: this is an employee the firm respects, who earns enough not to worry about every single penny, who dresses well, eats enough — you understand what I mean.
THE BOSS: To hear you talk, one would think I ran a fashion house and you were my model.
FRISCH (laughing): Herr Director, you’re not entirely wrong. All of your employees are models of a sort — models for the firm. It is based on them that people draw their conclusions about the productivity, reliability, and security of our whole operation. Believe me, every well-dressed, well-groomed employee is good promotion for the company at large. So then, about this raise you want to grant me, what do you say we put it on the books as a general advertising expense? Sound good?
THE BOSS: Hold on! Hold on! We’re not there yet, my dear Frisch! What you’re saying sounds well and good, but what am I supposed to do when our current business plan effectively allows no new costs whatsoever! As head bookkeeper, you of all people should know this.
FRISCH: Sure enough, Herr Director, I do know our present situation better than anyone, but I would like to draw your attention to something else. You know that last year we celebrated our fiftieth anniversary, and every one of us employees received, along with a special bonus, an anniversary publication written personally by you. I read through this booklet with much interest.
THE BOSS: What does that have to do with your raise?
FRISCH: Just a second, now. What you write there is very interesting: about how, in the chaos that ensued after the Founding Years,3 your esteemed father had the pluck to build up his new business and to position it on a solid footing; about how he spared no sacrifice to produce only first-class goods; about how he spent great sums on new mechanical equipment because he trusted that the investment would pay off; about how he paid his employees more than the competition did because he wanted them to be committed to his firm. Is it not true, Herr Director? Do you see what I mean?
THE BOSS (sympathetically): Well now, you really studied that little booklet. But these are different times, my good fellow. Oh Lord, how simple things were back then!
FRISCH (firmly): Yes, perhaps these are different times, but our firm has, I think, remained very much the same. You have continued to operate in the same spirit as your dear father. And do you not believe that in these difficult times it is all the more important to enlist help that is totally reliable, people to whom you can entrust the firm? I believe it’s even more critical today than it was back then.
THE BOSS (somewhat moved): Well, well, I suppose you’re right, my good fellow. So, now tell me: what is it you want exactly?
FRISCH (after a brief pause): Five hundred.
THE BOSS: I beg your pardon?
FRISCH (decisively): Five hundred marks.
THE BOSS: I keep hearing 500 marks.
FRISCH: Sure, that’s what I said as well.
THE BOSS: Well, banish the thought, my dear friend. I’m no millionaire, after all.
FRISCH: Hmm. I’m no millionaire either if I earn 500 marks. And I believe, Herr Director, without wanting to sound presumptuous, that my expertise saves your company more money in one week than the extra pay I’m asking for each month.
THE BOSS: Oh no, I seriously doubt that.
FRISCH: Yes, really! If you calculate the losses due to theft, and so forth, in the most recent closing, you’ll see I’m right.
THE BOSS: I don’t want to argue with you. But please, you must consider our current circumstances. We’re not going to make even sixty percent of what we made last year.
FRISCH: Yes, yes, we must keep at it. We’ve got to make an effort, and I for one shall do my part to get revenue back up again.
THE BOSS: That’s what I would expect from you. So let’s talk this over sensibly. Are you satisfied with 400 marks?
FRISCH: No. That’s only fifty more than I earned before. Please don’t be offended, Herr Director, but I was expecting more.
THE BOSS: Very well. I appreciate your value to the company. I would not have you think me petty. Let’s agree on 450.
FRISCH (after a pause): Alright then, considering our current circumstances, 450 marks. I will do my utmost to ensure that the next time I ask for a raise, you will no longer have this excuse as a reason to object.
THE BOSS (laughing): That’s just fine by me. If our revenue goes up, you won’t be the last to benefit. — But you know, you really are quite an odd fellow. And come to think of it, sometimes it seems to me that you’re the boss and I’m the employee. It’s very strange.
FRISCH (earnestly): Yes, of course! If I may, allow me to explain: at your firm, I don’t feel like an employee who does his duty for eight hours and then goes home. If you’ll forgive my saying so, sometimes I actually feel like I am the boss, at least as far the headaches are concerned.
THE BOSS: That truly gives me pleasure. As you well know, I only team up with independent, responsible people.
FRISCH (with a touch of irony): Well, perhaps this, too, will be reflected come payday.
THE BOSS (laughing): Are you on with that again? Enough is enough. I think you can be quite satisfied for today.
FRISCH: That I am — for today. And I thank you very much.
THE BOSS: Alright — but please get busy on this Zwickau matter right away.
FRISCH: Consider it done. Good morning.
THE BOSS: Good morning. (To himself.) Crafty fellow, that Frisch.
A door closes.
THE SPEAKER: Now, there you are. Herr Frisch got exactly what he wanted. A pay raise of 100 marks. And did he not go about it most sensibly?
THE SKEPTIC: Hmm. I can’t deny you that. Your Herr Frisch is indeed a master of subtlety.
THE SPEAKER: Quite so. And I dare say the boss had the same idea. He was thinking: if Frisch was so clever at roping me in, imagine what he could do when negotiating with our clients! I need a man like that. I can’t let that kind of talent go.
THE SKEPTIC: Yep, I’ll grant you that. Still, your Herr Frisch is just an isolated case.
THE SPEAKER: Of course he’s an isolated case. Every person is an isolated case. Nevertheless, there will always be certain situations in which the same rules apply to everyone.