Afterward, Miri did a number of character searches. One of the guys in Robert's Fairmont classes had known him for years! She should have noticed that before. The two had so much in common! If she could just get them together. Hmm. Too bad that dummy Orozco was teaming with Robert… But Winston Blount was into something outside of school, and that involved at least one other person who had been in grad school with Robert way back in the 1970s.
How to set up something to bring them all together?
She also searched for graduate students who might want to talk with Robert. She was confident that no grandparent of Miri Gu would be susceptible to false flattery, but it would be nice for Robert to meet an outsider who obviously respected him. If it was somebody with weak data skills… well, that might be good, too; she might be able to help out directly.
She did a world search, the kind of thing that drags in yak herders desirous of learning English. But this time — hey, she got a near perfect match in less than five minutes. And this Sharif fellow was in Oregon, just far enough away that most contact would be virtual and tweakable. For all her snottiness, the little girl had made some really good suggestions.
Miri hesitated. In fact, all the really successful suggestions had been due to the little girl. Maybe the "little girl" persona was covering something. Miri started a query replicating out through everyone and everything that might provide identity clues. But even if the kid were really ten years old, it wouldn't prove anything. Some fifth graders were scary.
The woman was tall, and dressed in black. "I understand you're looking for some help," she said.
Huh ? Zulfikar Sharif looked up from his beef taco. He hadn't heard her approach. Then he realized that he was still alone at his table in the back of the OSU caf. He frowned at the apparition, "I'm not accepting fantasies." God protect me. I've been perverted still again .
The woman looked at him severely. She wasn't more than thirty, but he couldn't imagine her on a date. "Young man, I am not your fantasy. You are looking for help with a thesis topic, are you not?"
"Oh!" Zulfi Sharif was no lover of high technology, but now in his second year in the OSU Literature Department, he'd become a bit desperate. His thesis advisor was no help; Professor Blandings seemed most interested in having a permanent, unpaid research assistant. So way back in January, Sharif had put out feelers for help. That had provoked endless adverts for plagiarized and custom-writ material. Annie Blandings was so obnoxious that Sharif was almost tempted by some of the early offers — till his geekier friends pointed out how badly that could go wrong.
Sharif had filtered out the plagiarists and the sarcastic jerkoffs. That left very little. So much for high technology. He had spent the last two semesters propping up Blandings's career in Deconstructive Revisionism. In the remaining time, he worked at a 411 job for the American Poetry Association and did his best to craft a thesis out of vapor. He had come to America hoping for old-world insight into the literature that he loved. Lately, he was beginning to wonder if he should have stayed home in Kolkata.
And now, suddenly, this woman. The answer to my prayers. Yes, sure . He waved her to be seated; at least that would embarrass her.
But the apparition knew exactly where it stood. It slid into the chair across the table with scarcely an overlap of body and furniture.
"I was really expecting an email," he said.
The woman in black just shrugged. Her imperious glance did not wa-ver. After a moment, Sharif continued, "In fact, I am looking for a thesis topic. But I'll have you know, I'm not interested in fraud, or plagiarism, or collaboration. If you're selling that, then please shove off. I simply want the sort of pointers" — and support — "that a good thesis advisor would give a student."
The lady smiled a cruel smile, and it suddenly occurred to Sharif that she might be connected to Annie Blandings. The old fart didn't even wear — but maybe she had friends who did.
"Nothing whatsoever illegal, Mr. Sharif. I simply saw your ad. I have a tremendous opportunity for you."
"And I don't have much money!"
"I'm sure we can come to an arrangement. Interested?"
"Well… possibly."
The lady in black leaned forward. Even her shadow matched the cafeteria lighting. Sharif hadn't realized that such precision was possible. "I don't suppose you know that Robert Gu is alive and well and living in Southern California?"
"Huh? Bullshit! He died some years ago. There hasn't been…" His words dribbled off before her silent stare. He tapped briefly at his phantom keypad, calling up a standard search. Since he started working 411, he'd become rather good at this kind of ultra-fast research. Results streamed across the tabletop. "Okay. He just stopped writing. Alzheimer's… and he's come back !"
"Indeed. Does this suggest possibilities?"
"um." Sharif continued his guppy imitation for a second or two. If I had just looked for the right facts, I would have known this a month ago . "It does suggest possibilities." Interviewing Robert Gu would run a close second to chatting up William Shakespeare.
"Good." The lady in black tented her fingers. "There are complications, however."
"Like what?" An opportunity this good must be a scam.
"Robert — " The woman's image seem to freeze for an instant, maybe a communications jitter. " — Professor Gu has never suffered fools gladly. And never less so than now. I can give you access capability in his private enum. It will be up to you to intrigue him."
Without the enum, getting through to the great man could be very difficult.
"How much?" he said. He had twenty thousand dollars in the student credit union. Perhaps his brother in Kolkata could be hit up for one more loan.
"Ah, my price is not in dollars. I simply ask to tag along, occasionally to make a suggestion or ask a question."
"But I'll have first use?"
"Of course."
"I, well — — " Sharif wavered. Robert Gu ! "Okay, you've got a deal."
"Very good." The lady gestured for his hand. "Give me a moment of full access."
Epiphany Rule Number One, what they pound on in all the instructions: Full access is only for parents and spouses — and then only if you like to take chances . Whether it was her tone or his need Sharif was never sure, but he reached out and touched the empty air. He matched the pointing gesture with a lowering of security. The tingle in his fingers was surely his imagination, but now the air between them was full of binding certificates.
Then the paperwork was done. What remained in the air was a single enum. Sharif stared at the identifier with sudden apprehension. "So I just call him?"
She nodded. "Now you have that capability. But remember what I said about his… his intolerance for fools. Do you know his works?" Or course.
"Do you admire them?"
"Yes! I honestly and intelligently admire the hell out of them." It was a claim that worked with all the profs Sharif knew. In this case, it was also the truth.
The lady nodded. "That may be enough. Keep in mind that Professor Gu is not feeling well. He is still recovering from his illness. You may have to be directly useful to him."
"I'll empty the man's chamber pot if that will help."
Again a brief freeze of expression. "Ah! I don't think that will be necessary. But he misses things from the past. He misses the way books used to be. You know, those clunky things you have to carry around."