“That was some dinner, I haven't had a meal like that in ages. Thank you,” he said, feeling as though he could hardly move. Most nights now, he worked late, went to the gym, and came home close to midnight. He rarely even stopped for dinner. He went to a diner sometimes in the daytime. “I haven't had a home-cooked meal in years.” Shirley had always hated to cook, and preferred getting take-out from her parents' restaurant. She never even liked to cook for the kids, and liked taking them out too.
“Doesn't your wife cook for you?” Fernanda looked surprised, and then suddenly, for no particular reason, noticed the absence of his wedding ring. The year before, during Sam's kidnapping, it had been there. And now it wasn't.
“Not anymore,” he said simply, and then decided he ought to explain. “We split up right after Christmas. I guess it was a long time coming, and we should have done it years ago. But it was hard anyway.” It had been five months, and he hadn't gone out with another woman yet. In some ways, he still felt married to her.
“Did something specific happen?” Fernanda looked sorry for him, and sympathetic. She knew how loyal he was to his wife, and how much he valued the marriage, even though he had admitted that things weren't perfect between them, and he had said they were very different people.
“Yes and no. The week before Christmas she told me she was going to Europe with a bunch of her girlfriends over the holidays until after New Year. She couldn't see why I was upset about it. She thought I was standing in the way of her having fun, and I thought she should be home with me and the boys. She said she's been doing that for nearly thirty years, and now it's her turn. I guess she has a point. She works hard, she'd saved the money. Apparently, she had a great time. I'm happy for her. But it pointed out to me that we don't have much anymore. We didn't for a long time, but I thought we should stay married anyway. I didn't think it was right for us to get divorced when the kids were small. Anyway, I thought about it while she was gone, and I asked her how she felt about it when she came back. She said she's wanted out for a long time, but was afraid to tell me. She didn't want to hurt my feelings, which is kind of a lousy reason to stay married.
“She met someone else about three weeks after we split up. I gave her the house, and I got an apartment downtown near the office. It takes some getting used to, but it's okay. Now I wish I'd done it sooner. I'm a little old to be out there dating again.” He had just turned forty-eight. Fernanda was turning forty-one that summer, and she felt the same way. “What about you, are you going out with your lawyer?” He had been sure that he had that in mind the year before, and was just biding his time while Fernanda adjusted to her widowhood, and then the kidnapping came along. Ted wasn't far wrong.
“Jack?” She laughed in answer, and shook her head. “What made you think that?” He was very astute. But then again, studying people was his job.
“I thought he had a thing for you.” Ted shrugged, thinking maybe he had made a mistake in his assessment, given the way she reacted.
“He did. He thought I should marry him for the chil-dren's sake, so he could help me pay the bills. He said he had made a ‘decision’ about it, and it was the right thing for me to do, for my kids. The only problem was he forgot to consult me about the decision. And I didn't agree with him.”
“Why not?” Ted was surprised. Jack was smart, successful, and good-looking. Ted thought he was perfect for her. Apparently, she didn't agree.
“I don't love him.” She said it as though that explained it all, as she smiled at him. “I fired him as my lawyer too.”
“Poor guy.” Ted couldn't help laughing at the picture she painted, getting turned down on his proposal and fired all in the same day. “That's too bad. He seemed like a nice guy.”
“Then you marry him. I don't want to. I'd rather be alone with my kids.” And indeed she was. Ted had that impression now, just looking at her. And he wasn't quite sure what to say next. “Are you divorced, by the way? Or just separated?” Not that it mattered. She was just curious how serious he was about leaving Shirley. It seemed hard to believe that he was out of his marriage, and it was for him too.
“The divorce will be final in six weeks,” he said, and sounded sad about it. It was sad after twenty-nine years. He was getting used to it, but it had been a huge change for him. “Maybe we could go to a movie sometime,” he said cautiously. She smiled, and it seemed a funny way to start, after they had spent days on end together, and nights on the floor, and he had been there, holding her hand when the SWAT team brought Sam back to her.
“I'd like that. We've missed seeing you,” she said honestly. She was sorry that he had never called.
“I was afraid I'd be a bad memory for all of you, after everything that happened.”
She shook her head then. “You're not a bad memory, Ted. You were the only good part of it. That and getting Sam back.” And then she smiled at him again, touched by his thoughtfulness. He had always been so kind to her kids, and to her. “Sam loves his star.”
“I'm glad. I was going to give it to one of my sons, and then I decided Sam should have it. He earned it.”
She nodded. “Yes, he did.” And as she said it, she thought back to the year before, everything they had said to each other, the things that had gone unspoken but she knew had been felt by both of them. There had been a connection between them, and the only thing that had stopped it from going further was his loyalty to his failing marriage, and she had respected him for it. And now they seemed to be starting from the beginning. He looked at her, and suddenly they both forgot the last year. It seemed to melt away from them, and without saying a word, he leaned toward her where they sat at the dining table and kissed her.
“I missed you so much,” he whispered, and she nodded, and smiled at him.
“Me too. I was so sad you didn't call. I thought you forgot us.” They were whispering to each other, so no one would hear. The house was small, and the kids were very close.
“I didn't think I should… that was dumb of me,” he said, and kissed her again. He couldn't get enough of her now, and wished he hadn't waited so long. He had spent months not calling her, thinking he wasn't good enough, or rich enough for her. He realized now that he should have known better. She was more than that. She was real. And he had known ever since the kidnapping that he loved her. And she loved him. This was the magic she had been telling Jack about, that he had never understood. It was the right kind of compliment from God, not like the other one … the easy kind that soothed all the old wounds of loss, and terror, and tragedy. This was the happiness they had both dreamed of, and hadn't had in a long time.
They sat kissing at the dining table, and then he helped her clear the table, followed her into the kitchen, and kissed her again. He was standing with his arms around her, when they both jumped about a foot, as Sam leaped into the room and shouted at them.
“You're under arrest!” he said convincingly, pointing an imaginary gun at them.
“For what?” Ted turned with a grin. Sam had nearly given him a heart attack, and Fernanda was giggling like a kid, looking embarrassed.
“For kissing my mom!” Sam pronounced with an enormous grin and put the “gun” down, as Ted smiled at him.
“Is there a law against that?” Ted asked, as he pulled Sam toward them, and hugged him, including him in the circle with them.
“No, you can have her,” Sam said matter-of-factly, wriggling free of their embrace, which he found embarrassing. “I think she likes you. She said she missed you. I did too,” he said, and disappeared to announce to his sister that he'd seen Ted kissing Mom.
“It's official then.” Ted put an arm around her and looked pleased. “He said I can have you. Do I take you with me now, or pick you up later?”