“I know we do,” I muttered.
“It’s getting dark now, we should be going soon.”
I couldn’t wait to get out of this apartment, and to put some space between Cade and Bret. But the thought of being outside again, of being completely exposed to those creatures once more, caused a cold chill to run down my spine.
CHAPTER 16
I turned the scuba tank over in my hands. I had no idea what the hell we were going to do with these damn things. What the hell were we thinking to even attempt this incredibly crazy idea, even if it had been mycrazy idea? Drowning was not one of the ways I wanted to go out, but then again neither was getting my blood drained by some crazy freaking spider/tick/octopus/jellyfish like monster.
Both options sucked, but I preferred to give my body over to nature than the aliens any day. “There might be some kind of manual or something around here,” Aiden muttered, biting on his bottom lip as he wandered behind the counter. “A video even.”
“A video?” I inquired dryly.
“DVD maybe.”
I rolled my eyes as I shook my head. Only Aiden would think that he could play a DVD and know what to do, or that there even was a DVD on the basics of scuba diving. But then again, for all I knew, there actually might be one. Abby was holding up a set of flippers, studying them carefully as she flapped them in the air. We had lived on Cape Cod our entire lives, but strangely enough my siblings and I had never donned a set of flippers before.
“We do have Molly,” I reminded him.
Aiden shrugged absently. “Would still like to learn as much as possible beforehand.”
I followed Aiden behind the counter, holding the flashlight for him as he rummaged through the shelves. I didn’t think he had a shot in hell of finding a video, but I didn’t say that to him. I figured he simply needed something to distract him from what we were going to do. “Here’s something.”
“What?” I asked in surprise.
He pulled out a stack of papers and fluttered them in the air. “It’s a manual.” Well that might be helpful, I thought silently. Though, I was pretty sure that reading about scuba diving wasn’t the best way to learn how to do it. It was better than nothing though, that was for sure. He sat back on his heels, flipping through the pages. “It will help.”
He put it on top of the counter as he stood up. Cade and Molly came around from where they had been exploring the back of the store. “There’s a room back there, but it has windows. We either leave tonight for the mainland, or we go back to the apartment,” Cade informed us briskly.
He’d been on edge since we’d left the apartment. The strange thing was that I didn’t think it had anything to do with what had happened with Bret, but with something else entirely. He was pale again, his mouth pinched once more. I wondered if perhaps he hadn’t slept like the rest of us. I worried about him, afraid that he was going to make himself sick with lack of sleep and nutrition.
I didn’t like the idea of staying here, or going back outside. Unfortunately we didn’t have a choice. “I want to read this,” Aiden replied, tapping his fingers on the pages before him. “Maybe we should go back to the apartment till tomorrow night then.”
“Are we taking all this stuff with us?” Jenna inquired softly. I had noticed that she had become a lot more agreeable, and nicer, since she’d seen Cade and I holding hands in front of Bret. “It’s pretty heavy.”
“I guess we can leave it,” Aiden answered but his attention was elsewhere. He was like a pit bull when he became focused on something, he locked onto it and wouldn’t let go, and right now he was focused on that manual.
“There’s no guarantee we’ll be able to make it back here,” I protested instantly.
“Hmm, true,” Aiden muttered.
I sighed as I shook my head at him. I moved away from the counter, heading to the back of the store. The windows held a glimpse of the ocean. Through the trees and homes, I could just make out the light of the moon sparkling across the gleaming surface of the water. It all looked so peaceful, so wonderfully normal and safe. For one brief moment I could almost believe that everything was as it should be. That there was no fear, hunger, or pain anymore.
I closed my eyes, wrapping my arms around myself as I tried to bottle the rush of emotions that surged up in me. For one brief, poignant moment, I allowed myself to long for everything that we had lost, everything that we would never have again. Then, I opened my eyes, and forced myself to accept the fact that this was our new reality. Running, hiding, being hungry, scared, dirty, and tired was all we would know for the rest of our lives. But at least we were alive, we still had loved ones, and we were still moving which was more than I could say for most people.
“Are you ok Bethy?”
I hadn’t heard Abby approach, but she was suddenly at my side. “I’m fine.”
“Are you sure? You seem so… ah… I don’t know, but you don’t seem like you lately.”
She was trying to discreetly ask about Cade, but I didn’t have any answers for her. I didn’t know what it all meant, how it would all turn out. All I knew was that everything was very complicated and I wasn’t ready to talk about it. “None of us are the same lately.”
“Bret…”
“I don’t want to talk about it Abby.”
“He loves you Bethany. He’s our friend. What are you doing?” I turned back to the window, unable to stand the wounded, pleading look in her eyes anymore. I felt bad enough without her heaping more guilt onto me. “Cade is…”
I glanced sharply at her. “Is what?” I grated.
She shrugged her delicate shoulders. “I don’t know; he’s always been distant, aloof, so cold and hard. He’s a stranger, we barely know him. Bethany…”
“I can’t explain it Abby, I just can’t. It’s completely unexplainable but Cade isn’t those things, not really.”
Abby was silent, her gaze drifted slowly toward where Jenna stood with Molly. I knew she was thinking about when Cade had threatened to leave Jenna at the dump. “That iswho he is Bethy. It’s the way he is toward all of us.” Her dark eyes came slowly back to me. They were wide with dawning understanding, her mouth parted slightly as she gazed at me in surprise. “It’s just not who he is with you.”
I shifted slightly before turning my attention back to the window. She was right, Cade was hard, he was cold, he was deadly, and he was volatile. They were all traits that he had clearly exhibited over the past few days. He just wasn’t like that with me, he never would be. I knew that intrinsically. I didn’t know how to explain that to her though, and I wasn’t sure she would understand even if I could explain it to her, especially when I didn’t. People had been weary of Cade for years; that wasn’t going to change simply because I wanted it to.