My hands were strong now, just like the rest of me.
Boonie grunted as my fingers dug in, finding each muscle and working it until I knew he’d be sore the next day.
“Is that too much?” I asked ten minutes later. He gave a low laugh.
“I’ll take everything you have and more, Darce. You should know that by now.”
After that it was a contest of wills. No matter how hard I worked him, he refused to complain.
“I’m ready for you to roll over,” I said finally, feeling frustrated. “I’ll hold the sheet.”
“You don’t want me on my back right now,” he said, pushing his hips lewdly into the table. I watched the flex of his butt and thigh, his meaning all too clear.
Goddammit.
“Um, I can just do a relaxing massage on your back for the rest of the time, I guess.”
“Darcy?”
“Yes?”
“I think it’s time for this to end,’’ he said, his voice strained.
“Sounds great,’’ I replied quickly, not even pausing to gloat. “I’ll step out so you can get dressed. We didn’t go the full time, so I’ll tell Kelly that—”
“Sit down.”
It wasn’t a request. Fuck. I reached for my small rolling stool and sat down. Boonie pushed to his elbows, putting us face to face. For the first time his face softened.
“Renee Evans came to my graduation from basic training,” he said slowly. “Did you know that?”
His words stunned me.
“What?”
“She came to my graduation,” he said again slowly. “Afterward she talked to me. She said that you were doing well, but that life had gotten hard for you. She told me how people were, and she told me how big a help you were to their family. Then she told me that if I cared about you at all, I’d let you go.”
I swayed on the stool, trying to process what he was saying.
“Why?” I asked. “Why would she do that?”
“I think she believed it,” he replied slowly. “She said she’d protect you, but only if I stopped writing. Otherwise you’d be on your own, at the mercy of that whole damned town. So I stopped writing. I couldn’t be here for you and you weren’t even a legal adult yet . . . She said your life would be a living hell. I knew she was right.
Every word was like a knife cutting me.
“Is that why you never came back to Callup?”
“I did come back,” he replied. “The summer you finished high school. I saw you with Farell at the park. He was in his chair and you were racing each other. You were both laughing and you looked so happy together, Darcy. I had nothing to give you and he had everything. Not even I’m that big of an asshole.”
I swallowed, studying his face. He was telling the truth, absolutely no question. I couldn’t believe Renee had done it. Even now she was like a mother to me. Why?
To protect Farell, of course.
She’d been his mother first.
“That fucking sucks,’’ I whispered.
“Were you happy with him?”
I sighed, wishing I’d never gotten out of bed that morning. It was too much. All of it.
“At first, maybe. He didn’t get bad until after we’d been married for close to a year. He’s got a lot of pain—the nerve damage makes it almost constant. He was drinking more and more, and he burns through pain pills like you wouldn’t believe. Then he started gambling and things got ugly. His parents spent more than six hundred thousand bucks bailing him out that I know of. Like I said, they’ve finally cut him off.”
“You never answered my question—did he hurt you?”
“He never hit me. My lawyer tells me he was verbally abusive, whatever that means. All I know is that I was dying inside. I’m not ready to be dead.”
We stared at each other, then he reached out to wipe something off my cheek. A tear. I hadn’t even realized I was crying.
“I want you, Darce,” he said, his words more intense than anything I’d ever heard in my life. “I never stopped wanting you. Not for one day. You’ve been in my blood since we were kids.”
Swallowing, I closed my eyes, desperate to carve out enough space to think. This was huge, all of it. Him still wanting me, learning that Renee had set me up.
That hurt. I’d trusted her.
I guess there wasn’t much I wouldn’t put past the Evans family. There was a reason I hadn’t asked for anything in the divorce—their money didn’t just come with strings.
It came with chains.
“I’m not ready for a relationship yet,” I said, looking at him again. “For the first time in my life, I’m free. I’m not sure I can give that up again.”
Boonie’s eyes darkened.
“Give me a chance,” he said softly. “That’s all I’m asking.”
“I’ll think about it.”
I spent the rest of the day obsessing about our talk. Part of me wanted to call Farell’s mom and confront her—she’d been my ally, my savior, even my friend for so long now.
I couldn’t believe she’d done this to me.
Of course, she probably thought she’d been doing me a favor. In her mind, I was a poor girl who’d done well for herself, marrying into one of the most prominent families in the valley. I knew better than that now.
You can’t buy happiness.
By that evening I was tired of thinking, so a night partying with Kelly and her friends sounded perfect. I didn’t know the girls that well, but we’d gone out a few times and they were all fun and nice. Not only that, there was a huge car show going on downtown. Thousands of people were flooding the streets to see the hot rods on parade, which meant lots of good music, cheap booze, and dancing in my future. So what if Boonie confused me? That didn’t mean I shouldn’t go out and have fun.
Tomorrow was soon enough to figure him out.
Popping a beer, I pulled on a short skirt and a sexy thong/bra combo I’d bought for myself to celebrate the divorce. I finished it off with a low-cut top that showed off my shoulders, and cute sandals. My hair was long and free, my makeup was just this side of slutty, and I was ready for action.
Unfortunately, it was still two hours before I was supposed to meet my friends. I decided to go down early, finding a spot on Sherman Avenue to sit on the curb and watch the cars drive by. All around me little children jumped and squealed, their parents drinking beer and arguing about whether Ford or Chevy should rule the world.
Time passed as the kids disappeared and younger people started filling the bars. It felt good to be out. Farell didn’t like being around people after his accident, so it seemed like we always ended up staying home.
The Ironhorse had a live band for the night, and they’d opened up their big sliding glass doors onto the street, creating a beer garden outside. Kelly was already there when I came in, along with her friend Cherise. I knew there were more girls on the way, but they weren’t going to join us until later. We did a round of shots before hitting the dance floor. By midnight I couldn’t remember why the hell I’d ever considered staying home.
“I need water!” I yelled in Kelly’s ear, lurching toward the bar. We had a table staked out in the back corner, but flagging down a waitress was next to impossible.
“Grab a pitcher for the table!” she replied, turning back to the dance floor. I wound my way through the crowds of people, trying not to fall on my face. I’d lost track of how many shots we’d done. More than a lot, but not too many. Yet. I giggled at the thought—when was the last time I went out and just let myself go?
The bar was slammed, of course. Not exactly a huge surprise, but I didn’t mind waiting my turn. I could use the break. Even though I was in good shape, all that dancing left me out of breath and covered in sweat. I probably looked like hell, but that didn’t matter—I wasn’t here to find a man.