“God. I shouldn’t have gone to volleyball. I should’ve stayed and helped you.”
“Don’t be silly. This isn’t your fault. The doctor doesn’t even think it’s mine. I just…I could’ve been more careful.”
Riley stuck around and kept me company for hours. At about ten-thirty, they finally moved me from the Emergency Room to a regular room upstairs. It had two beds, but luckily the one next to me was empty so I had the room to myself. My eyelids were so heavy that I started to doze while Riley was talking to me.
“I guess I’m boring you.” She laughed when my eyes fluttered back open.
“No. I’m sorry. I’m just so tired.”
“It’s late. And it’s been a long day. First, you were in the sun for the tag sale, and then this. I might take that bed next to you soon.”
I smiled. “You should go home.”
“You sure? What if you need something?”
I lifted the little buzzer the nurse had clipped to the railing on my bed. “I have a bell. I’ll call the nurse.”
“Okay. But call me if you need anything.” She leaned over and hugged me. “I’ll be back first thing in the morning, G. Get some sleep.”
That was the last thing I remembered before I stirred sometime in the middle of the night. When my eyes came into focus in the dark, I was confused where I was at first. But even more confused to find Rush slouched in the chair next to my bed, sound asleep. I hadn’t called him? Had I?
I sat up in an attempt to clear my head. The soft rustling of the sheets moving must have been enough to wake him
“Hey,” he whispered. “How are you feeling?”
“Okay. But…how did you know I was here?”
“Birdbrain called into work sick earlier.”
“Birdbrain?”
“Your buddy, Riley. She called in saying she wasn’t feeling well and needed to stay home. She sounded fine to me. But when I asked her how you were…she acted funny. I tried your cell to see if everything was okay, and you weren’t answering.”
“My phone died in the Emergency Room, and I didn’t have a charger.”
“I got worried and went to the house. Birdbrain wouldn’t let me in. She said you were fine and sleeping. Something was off, so I fired her ass and told her she wouldn’t qualify for the full summer season bonus that she was so close to getting.”
“You fired her?”
He shrugged. “Got her to give up where you were.”
I closed my eyes. “Sorry I made you worry.”
“Why didn’t you call me?”
I looked away. “I need to start doing things on my own. Whether I’m happy, sad, mad, or scared, my first instinct is to pick up the phone and call you.”
Rush stayed quiet for so long that I had to look and see what he was doing. His head was in his hands. “I really fucked things up between us.”
“No, you didn’t. Everything that happened is my fault.”
Rush stood. “Scoot over.”
I moved to one side while Rush pulled the curtain around us, even though no one else was in the room. Then he slipped off his shoes and climbed into bed. He lay on his back and tucked me into the crux of his arm and began to stroke my hair.
“I was so scared. I think I broke a hundred miles an hour driving here.”
“I was scared, too. That’s probably why my blood pressure was high, and the doctor wanted to keep me overnight.”
“I’m sorry I wasn’t here for you.”
“Well, you didn’t have any way of knowing.”
“Doesn’t matter.”
Rush stroked my hair, and we were both silent for a long time. It felt so good to be in bed with him, even if it was just snuggling. The warmth of his body, the way I folded and fit so perfectly in his arms, everything felt right again even in the midst of a crazy twenty-four hours.
“The doctor mentioned miscarriage last night,” I said. “Even though I’m not even halfway done with this pregnancy, and my life would probably be so much easier if I wasn’t…” I couldn’t even say it out loud. “I mean…it would fix so many broken things. But I don’t want to lose this baby, Rush. I already love him, and the thought of anything happening terrifies me.”
Rush kissed the top of my head and squeezed me closer. “Yeah.”
“I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry that everything turned out the way it did. I’d give anything for you to be this baby’s father.”
Rush went quiet again. His voice cracked when he finally spoke. “Me, too, Gia. Me, too.”
Getting that off my chest and being held in his arms made me feel so relaxed that soon I started to drift off to sleep again. Rush’s groggy voice interrupted my slumber. “Him.”
“Hmmm?”
“You said him. You think our little guy is a boy, too.”
I woke to a beam of sunshine warming my face. Squinting, I looked over at the empty space next to me on the bed, and a sudden panic came over me. Where’s Rush?
I calmed slightly when I found someone sitting in the chair. Only…it wasn’t Rush. Trying to hide my disappointment, I forced a smile as best I could. “Hi, Dad. When did you get here? And where’s Rush?”
He leaned forward to the edge of his seat and pushed back the hair from my forehead. “I’ve been here about ten minutes. Haven’t seen Rush. But I’m glad he called me early this morning. Why the hell didn’t you call me, Gia?”
I sighed. “I’m sorry. I didn’t want to worry you. It was late by the time they admitted me to a room.”
“You should’ve called me the minute you thought something was wrong. I would have called the local precinct and sent someone to pick you up and take you to the ER, lights and sirens.”
I smiled. “That’s exactly why I didn’t call you. I’m fine. I spoke to the doctor on the phone, and he had me come in as a precaution. I only stayed overnight because my blood pressure was a little high.”
My father looked at the monitor above my head. “Pressure’s nice and low now. Machine took it while you were sleeping.”
I let out a large exhale. “Oh good. Hopefully I can get out of here this morning.”
I caught Dad up on everything that transpired last night. When I was almost done, there was a knock at the door. I turned to find Rush walking in with two coffee cups in his hand. He set them down on the food tray next to my bed and extended his hand to Dad.
“Mr. Mirabelli.” Rush nodded, and my father stood to shake his hand.
“Call me Tony, son. And I really appreciate you calling. Especially since my daughter didn’t think it was important to give me a ring.”
Both men’s eyes landed on me with serious faces. “No problem.” Rush shook his head. “She didn’t think it was important enough to call me, either.”
I rolled my eyes. “I was fine.”
Rush nodded toward the coffee on the tray. “That’s a decaf for you.” He looked at my dad. “You can take the other, Tony. I already had one, and I can pick another one up on my way to work.”
“Thank you.”
The room became awkward all of a sudden. Rush shoved his hands into his jean pockets and looked out the window, seemingly lost in thought. Eventually, his focus came back and he glanced back and forth between Dad and me a few times. His face was sad. “I guess I should get going then. I have a seafood delivery coming this morning at the restaurant. I’ll come back after.”
My dad stood. “You go do what you have to do. I’ll take it from here. No need to come back.
Thanks again for calling me.”
I didn’t want Rush to leave, and it didn’t look like he really wanted to leave, either. Or maybe that’s just what I wanted to see. But he kissed me goodbye on the forehead, nonetheless. “Text me, and let me know you’re home safe. Okay?”
I nodded.
He walked to the hospital room door and stopped. For a second, I got my hopes up that maybe he’d changed his mind. But instead, he looked back over his shoulder one last time and said, “Take care of yourself, Gia.”
I had two channels lately: pissed off and really fucking pissed off.
