The pause was long, but not too long. Maybe they felt the seeds of hope right then, the hope that all living beings felt when given an alternative in the face of doom.
“You are not machines. You have fought with Honor. We will listen.”
13
I was down to three options: kill all the Centaurs by blowing a hole in their habitat, fight the Centaurs and die against their numbers, or turn against the Macros. I wasn’t quite sure yet which option I was going to choose, but much of the choice revolved around what the Centaurs did next.
Oddly, in the back of my mind, I kept having thoughts of my kids. I hadn’t fought a Centaur since that first fateful day when the Nano ships came to my farm. I had never really gotten over it, of course. When something that traumatic happens to you, a person can push it down, shove it away-but it will always come back. There were dreams and occasional biting thoughts. I would forget about the kids for days, then a stray reminder would hit me, maybe a smell or a familiar sound. Then I would be swamped with visions of Easter egg hunts, bicycle trainings and shoving my butt into tiny chairs on back-to-school nights.
The heaped bodies of Centaurs all around me triggered these thoughts and feelings. The strange thing was, I felt better about that distant day now. I had promised then to tear up some of these aliens, and now at long last, I’d had my fill of their blood. Even though these individuals had no idea how much I’d once wanted to kill them all, they made me feel like I’d followed through. Killing a dozen or so personally in self-defense had done me a world of good. I could forgive them now. In a way, it was disturbing. Was it right that I should deprive these creatures’ young of their parents? I didn’t know, but I’d once vowed to do it in the name of my dead kids. I suppose the whole mess gave me some kind of closure. I could forgive these creatures now, especially since I knew they really had had no choice when the Nano ships had forced them to fight for their lives.
The machines were next, I thought. Next on my list of guilty parties. I nodded to myself, and inside my helmet a thin, grim smile grew. I knew then I was going to give it a try. I wasn’t going to sacrifice my men to save Earth. I wasn’t going to sacrifice a few million Centaurs to save myself, either. I was going to take the third option. Many might have thought it presumptuous and fantastically risky, kick-starting this war again. The problem was, the way the Macros were treating these Centaurs proved to me that it was only a matter of time. The Macros had no intention of letting us live on forever. They weren’t really our allies. They intended to kill us all, once we were no longer useful to them. Here they were, cheating on their treaty with the Centaurs, and using us to do their dirty work. What if they sent some race of arachnids to Earth, thereby honoring their treaty, but still causing millions to die? It could be happening right now, for all I knew.
I walked over to Kwon, who still hovered over the small, thin form of Joelle Marquis. She had blonde, curly hair, I could see. The corpsman had her intubated with oxygen running down her throat. She was breathing, but that could have been the nanites stimulating her diaphragm muscles.
“Is she going to make it?” I asked.
Kwon shook his head. “Don’t know.”
“If she dies, who would you blame?” I asked him.
For the first time, he looked up at me seriously. “The Macros,” he said. “They sent us here. We will all die here, or the Centaurs will.”
“How about if we make the Macros die instead?” I asked.
Now I had the corpsman’s attention as well as Kwon’s. His helmet tilted up and his eyes met mine through the visor. I saw his name on his uniform.
“Keep working on the lieutenant, Carlson,” I said.
The corpsman quickly looked down again, saying nothing. He fiddled with a box, running leads to Marquis’ chest. I knew what that meant. We had some nice nanite medical kits now. We could just lay a lead on a body, and a needle-thin wire of them would penetrate the flesh on its own. They would drive deep, and could be used to take measurements, deliver drugs or even shock a heart into beating again. The fact he was using the box wasn’t a positive sign, however. It indicated her injuries were mortal, and that her own nanite defense team could not repair her by itself.
Kwon was still staring at me. At last, he nodded his head. “You think now is the time?” he asked.
“I don’t like our other options. Even if we wipe these Centaurs out, the Macros will do the same to us eventually. Maybe very soon. Maybe, they’ve done it already.”
Carlson glanced up again at that. He looked down again without being told. Lieutenant Marquis was making a scratchy, rasping sound. It sounded like she was trying to breathe now, but there was fluid in her lungs.
“They could be hitting Earth even now,” Kwon said thoughtfully. He stood up and stared around at the field, littered with Centaur corpses. “A fine people. I don’t want to kill any more of them.”
“Neither do I,” I said. “Let’s see if we can talk them out of wasting our strength upon one another.”
I went to the communications box, and I started to negotiate. It took a long time. The Centaurs had their own framework for thought, their own culture. They talked constantly of ‘Herd Honor’ and ‘Challenges’. They frequently made references to their ancestors and the weather. They never used the pronoun ‘I’, but always used ‘we’. I did the same, to make them feel comfortable. They thought as a group, so I negotiated as a group.
I figured they would send up a group of leaders, individuals with white fur and long, curled horns. They didn’t present me with such wise old chieftains. They didn’t show themselves at all. I knew they were out there, hiding in the foliage. In the distance, we could see dust plumes where thousands, maybe even millions, marched and gathered. They were preparing to overwhelm us if the talks were fruitless. For my own part, I had my men clear the battlefield of bodies, if only so we could get a free field of fire. We burned down the nearest clumps of foliage to increase the range at which our laser rifles would be effective. It was all for show and to keep the men busy, of course. If the Centaurs charged us they would come with ten times their previous numbers, and all would be lost. I would only have two options then: to die on the spot, taking down as many of them as possible, or to do the bidding of my steel masters, to open up their ‘sky’ and suck them all out into space, kicking and bleating.
I didn’t like either possibility so I kept working with them on the communications box. There were translation problems and misunderstandings. Often, they interpreted what I said as some kind of Challenge, a call to battle. I did my best to disabuse them of these thoughts, but they kept coming back up. Maybe they wanted a fight. I got that feeling the longer I talked to them. They were angry we’d come here, angry the Macros had used us to circumvent their words of peace and angry we’d beaten them back the first time, leaving so many dead upon the field.
At the same time, however, I came to understand that our initial success at combat was the only reason they would talk to us at all. We’d proven ourselves. If we hadn’t, they wouldn’t have listened to anything we said. They were a showy culture, which liked displays of strength. Such displays won status among their herds. As far as I could tell, it was their only qualification for status. They were definitely intelligent, but their thinking was backward to me. They were more tribal and emotional than Earth diplomats could ever have been. Avenging an insult was worth a million deaths to them.
Working on that angle, I soon found myself coming closer to success.
“Yes,” I said, “we have dishonored you and ourselves by serving the machines. But the greater villains are the machines themselves.”