You’re welcome, said Bob. Very welcome, Bill.
The players started to walk back towards the bus. The bus back to Anfield. The players smiled at Bill, the players waved at Bill –
See you, Boss. See you tomorrow, Boss.
Bill waved back at the players. And Bill shouted, Oh aye. Rain or shine, boys. I’ll be here. Rain or shine, boys.
Well, I suppose we’d best be getting on the bus, too, said Bob.
Oh yes, Bob. Of course you had. Don’t let me keep you. You can’t be standing around here all day, gabbing with me. Oh no.
Bob, Joe, Reuben and Ronnie all nodded. Bob, Joe, Reuben and Ronnie all said goodbye to Bill. And then Bob, Joe, Reuben and Ronnie started to walk back towards the bus. The bus back to Anfield. Bill standing in the centre of the pitch. The training pitch. Bill watching them go. Back to Anfield, back to work. And Bill started to walk across the training pitch. To jog now, then to run. Bill caught up with Bob, Joe, Reuben and Ronnie. And Bill said, Actually, if no one minds. If I’m not in the way. Not under anyone’s feet. Because that’s the last thing I’d want to be. The very last thing. But I was wondering if I might just pop into the ground. To have a quick bath. If no one minds. I won’t come on the bus. Don’t worry. I’ve got the car. I’ll drive. I don’t mind. But I thought I might just pop into the ground. Just for a quick bath. After the players have gone, of course. Don’t worry, don’t worry. You’ll never know I was there …
Of course, said Bob. You’re welcome, Bill. And come on the bus, if you want. It doesn’t bother me, Bill.
Bill nodded. And Bill said, Thank you, Bob. Thank you. But it’s fine. I’ve got the car anyway. So I’ll drive. But thank you again, Bob. Thank you very much indeed.
You’re welcome, said Bob again. And you don’t need to ask, Bill. You’re always welcome.
Bill nodded. Bill smiled. And Bill watched Bob Paisley, Joe Fagan, Reuben Bennett and Ronnie Moran get back on the bus. The bus back to Anfield. Bill standing beside the bus. In the car park. Bill looked up at the windows of the bus. The bus back to Anfield. Bill smiled at the players in the windows of the bus. The bus back to Anfield. And the players smiled back at Bill through the windows of the bus. The bus back to Anfield. Bill waved at the players in the windows of the bus. The bus back to Anfield. And the players waved back at Bill through the windows of the bus. The bus back to Anfield. The bus pulling out, the bus going back. Pulling out of the car park, going back to Anfield. Leaving Melwood, leaving Bill. In the car park. Bill waving them off, Bill watching them go. In the car park. Bill walked towards his car. Across the car park, back to his car. And then Bill stopped. In the car park. Bill turned. Bill walked back to the training pitch. And Bill ran one more lap around the training pitch. And then another. And another. And then Bill stopped running. Bill walked back to the centre of the pitch. The training pitch. Bill stood in the centre of the pitch. The training pitch. And Bill looked around the ground. The training ground. This ground that had been cold, this ground that had been dark. Where there were trees and where there were bushes. The grass long and the ground uneven. With hills and with hollows. An air-raid shelter and a cricket pitch. And Bill smiled. And then Bill saw a ball. Out of the corner of his eye. An old white ball, over by the fence. Bill jogged over to the fence. Bill put his foot on the ball. The old white ball. Bill pulled the ball back towards him. His foot on the ball. Bill rolled the ball back behind him. Onto the pitch. The training pitch. And Bill turned. Bill tapped the ball in front of him. Right foot, left foot. Across the pitch. The training pitch. Right foot, left foot. Back towards the pavilion. Right foot, left foot. Until Bill reached the pavilion. And then Bill flicked up the ball with his right foot. And Bill caught the ball in his hands. The old white ball. Bill held the ball in his hands. Between his fingers. Bill looked down at the ball. The ball in his hands. Between his fingers. And Bill smiled again. And then Bill put the ball down. Beside the steps. The pavilion steps. The ball ready for tomorrow, the ball waiting for tomorrow. The training tomorrow. And Bill walked across the car park. Bill opened the door of his car. Bill took out his shoes from the car. Bill took off his boots. His football boots. Bill put on his shoes. Bill put his boots back in the bag. The plastic bag. Bill got into his car. Bill pulled out of the car park at Melwood. And Bill drove to Anfield. Ready for his bath, ready for a soak. Bill pulled into the car park at Anfield. Bill parked the car. Bill got out of his car. Bill walked across the car park. The Anfield car park. And into the ground. The Anfield ground. Into the dressing rooms. The Anfield dressing rooms. The players long gone. But their smell still there. The smell of sweat, the smell of work. And Bill smiled again. And Bill took off his shoes. Bill took off his sweater and his tracksuit bottoms. Bill still smiling to himself. Bill went into the baths. The Anfield baths. And Bill stepped into the bath. The Anfield bath. The water still warm, the water still deep. Bill sank into the bath. The Anfield bath. The water deep, the water warm. Bill put back his head. In the warm water, in the deep water. And Bill closed his eyes. In the bath. The Anfield bath. Bill listened to the sounds of the bath. The Anfield bath. The water dripping, the water lapping. Dripping down the sides, lapping on the tiles. In the baths. The Anfield baths. Bill listened to the sounds of the ground. The Anfield ground. In the bath, in his ears. The footsteps in the corridors, the footsteps on the stairs. Coming and going. The telephones ringing, the voices talking. Laughing and joking. In the bath, in his head. The voices whispering, the voices wondering. Coming and going, coming and going. Bill could go up the stairs. Bill could knock on the door. Not with a demand, not with a threat. Just something he wanted to do, something they would want him to do. After this period of reflection, this period of rest. All things now considered, all things then restored. Just as before, just as they were. Yes, he would go up the stairs. And he would knock on the door. All things now considered, all things then restored. In the bath. The Anfield bath. Bill opened his eyes. And Bill sat forward. The water cold now, the water old now. In the bath. The Anfield bath. Bill stood up. And Bill stepped out of the bath. All things now considered, all things then restored. Bill reached for his towel. Bill missed the towel. And Bill missed his step. On the tiles,
on his back. His shoulder gone –
Bill fought back the screams, Bill fought back the tears. On the tiles, on his back. The blood draining from his veins. Bill tried to stand. Bill tried to get back on his feet. His palm flat against the floor, his other hand reaching for the side. The side of the bath. Bill slipped again, slipped back again. Cursing to himself, raging against himself. Fighting back the screams, fighting back the tears. On the tiles, on his back. The blood still running from his veins. The voices no longer whispering, the voices no longer wondering. Just cursing, just raging. And knowing, now knowing. On the tiles,
on his back. Bill could not go up the stairs. Bill could not knock upon the door. Not now,
not now.
57. A GREAT RECKONING IN A LITTLE ROOM
John Smith saw Bill Shankly walking towards him across the car park. The Anfield car park. And John Smith said, Hello, Mr Shankly. Good to see you. In fact, I was hoping I might run into you. I was hoping I would see you. To have a word, if I might? If you have the time?