Sighing, I force myself to shove him toward freedom. “The cause needs me here. You need me here too.”
“What I need and what I want are two very different things.”
I try to laugh, but I can’t find the strength.
“This is not our end, Mare,” Kilorn murmurs, embracing me. He laughs to himself, the noise vibrating in his chest. “Red queen. Has a nice ring to it.”
“Get on, you fool.” Never have I smiled so brightly and still felt so sad.
He spares me one last glance and nods to Julian, before stepping out into the darkness. The metal knits back together behind him, blocking my friends from sight. Where they’re going, I don’t want to know.
Julian has to pull me away, but he doesn’t scold me for my long good-bye. I think he’s more preoccupied with Lucas, who, in his dazed state, has begun to drool.
22
That night I dream of my brother Shade coming to visit me in the darkness. He smells like gunpowder. But when I blink, he disappears and my mind screams what I already know. Shade is dead.
When morning comes, a series of shuffles and slams makes me bolt awake, sitting up in my bed. I expect to see Sentinels, Cal, or a murderous Ptolemus ready to rip me apart for what I’ve done, but it’s just the maids bustling in my closet. They look more harried than usual and pull down my clothes with abandon.
“What’s going on?”
In the closet, the girls freeze. They bow, hands full of silk and linen. As I come closer, I realize they’re standing over a set of leather trunks. “Are we going somewhere?”
“Orders, my lady,” one says, her eyes lowered. “We only know what we’re told.”
“Of course. Well, I’m just going to get dressed then.” I reach for the nearest outfit, intending to do something for myself for once, but the maids beat me to it.
Five minutes later, they have me painted and ready, dressed in odd leather pants and a flouncy shirt. I’d much prefer my training suit over everything else, but it’s apparently not “proper” to wear the thing outside of sessions.
“Lucas?” I ask the empty hallway, half expecting him to pop out from an alcove.
But Lucas is nowhere to be found, and I head off to Protocol, expecting him to cross my path. When he doesn’t, a trill of fear ripples through me. Julian made him forget last night, but maybe something slipped through the cracks. Maybe he’s being questioned, punished, for the night he can’t remember and what we forced him to do.
But I’m not alone for long. Maven steps into my path, his lips quirked into an amused smile.
“You’re up early.” Then he leans in, speaking in a low whisper. “Especially for having such a late night.”
“I don’t know what you mean.” I try for an innocent tone.
“The prisoners are gone. All three of them, disappeared into thin air.”
I put a hand to my heart, letting myself look shocked for the cameras. “By my colors! A few Reds, escaped from us? That seems impossible.”
“It does indeed.” Though the smile remains, his eyes darken slightly. “Of course, that brings everything into question. The power outages, the failing security system, not to mention a troop of Sentinels with blank spots across their memories.” He stares pointedly at me.
I return his sharp glance, letting him see my unease. “Your mother . . . interrogated them.”
“She did.”
“And will she be talking to”—I choose my words very carefully—“anyone else regarding the escape? Officers, guards—?”
Maven shakes his head. “Whoever did this did it well. I helped her with the questioning and directed her to anyone of suspicion.” Directed. Directed away from me. I breathe a small sigh of relief and squeeze his arm, thanking him for his protection. “Besides, we may never find who did it. People have been fleeing since last night. They think the Hall is no longer safe.”
“After last night, they’re probably right.” I slip my arm into his, drawing him closer. “What did your mother learn of the bomb?”
His voice drops to a whisper. “There was no bomb.” What? “It was an explosion, but it was also an accident. A bullet punctured a gas line in the floor, and when Cal’s fire hit it . . .” He trails off, letting his hands do the talking. “It was Mother’s idea to use that to our, ah, advantage.”
We don’t kill without purpose. “She’s turning the Guard into monsters.”
He nods gravely. “No one will want to stand with them. Not even Reds.”
My blood seems to boil. More lies. She’s beating us without firing a shot or drawing a blade. Words are all she needs. And now I’m being sent deeper into her world, to Archeon.
You won’t see your family again. Gisa will grow, until you don’t recognize her anymore. Bree and Tramy will marry, have children, and forget you. Dad will die slowly, suffocated by his wounds, and when he’s gone, Mom will slip away too.
Maven lets me think, his eyes thoughtful as he watches the emotions rise in my face. He always lets me think. Sometimes his silence is better than anyone else’s words.
“How long do we have left here?”
“We go this afternoon. Most of the court is leaving before that, but we have to take the boat. Keep some tradition in all this madness.”
When I was a little girl, I used to sit on my porch and watch the pretty boats pass, heading downriver to the capital. Shade would laugh at me for wanting to catch a glimpse of the king. I didn’t realize then it was just part of the pageant, another display just like the arena fights, to show exactly how low we were in the grand scheme of the world. Now I’m going to be part of it again, this time standing on the other side.
“At least you’ll get to see your home again, if only for a little while,” he adds, trying to be gentle. Yes, Maven, that’s just what I want. To stand and watch my home and my old life pass by.
But that’s the price I must pay. Freeing Kilorn and the others means losing my last few days in the valley, and it’s a trade I’m happy to make.
We’re interrupted by a loud crash from a nearby passage, the one leading to Cal’s room. Maven reacts first, moving to the edge of the hall before I can, like he’s trying to protect me from something.
“Bad dreams, brother?” he calls out, worried by what he sees.
In response, Cal steps out into the hallway, his fists clenched, like he’s trying to keep his own hands in check. Gone is the bloodstained uniform, replaced by what looks like Ptolemus’s armor, though Cal’s has a reddish tint.
I want to slap him, to claw at him and scream for what he did to Farley and Tristan and Kilorn and Walsh. The sparks dance inside me, begging to be loosed. But after all, what did I expect? I know what he is and what he believes in—Reds are not worth saving. So I speak as civilly as I can.
“Will you be leaving with your legion?” I know he isn’t, judging by the livid anger in his eyes. Once, I feared he would go, and now I wish he would. I can’t believe I cared about saving him. I can’t believe that was ever a thought in my head.
Cal heaves a breath. “The Shadow Legion isn’t going anywhere. Father will not allow it. Not now. It’s too dangerous, and I’m too valuable.”
“You know he’s right.” Maven puts a hand on his brother’s shoulder, trying to calm him. I remember watching Cal do the same thing to Maven, but now the crown is on a different head. “You are the heir. He can’t afford to lose you too.”
“I’m a soldier,” Cal spits, shrugging away from his brother’s touch. “I can’t just sit by and let others fight for me. I won’t do it.”
He sounds like a child whining for a toy—he must enjoy killing. It makes me sick. I don’t speak, letting the diplomatic Maven talk for me. He always knows what to say.