I nod. Tears spring into her eyes, and she jumps forward to wrap her arms around me. “Oh my baby Jessa. Look how you’ve grown. Look how pretty you are.” She pulls back, drinking in my face. “That means it worked. Callie was successful. I knew she could do it. I knew she could save your life. If anyone is strong enough to fight Fate—and win—I knew it would be her.”
“Yes.” I can’t tell her the truth. That my sister was successful, but not in the way she imagines. That Callie did manage to save my life—but at the expense of her own.
She grips my hands. “I’ve missed you so much.”
“I’ve been gone for only a few days,” I say, referring to my six-year-old self.
“My heart breaks every hour, every minute that you’re not with me,” she says, her voice trembling, her eyes searing into mine.
I frown. Who is this woman? It’s certainly not my mother, at least not the one I’ve known for the last four years. That woman is more restrained; our conversations are much more stilted. She would never pour out her heart like this—and assume her affections will be accepted without question.
Oh Fates. This was the woman she was before tragedy struck. This open, affectionate woman is my mother before both her daughters were ripped away from her.
I close my eyes and take shallow, openmouthed breaths. It is almost too much to bear. I would rip apart my very soul if I could save her from the pain she’s about to endure. But I have to think of Remi. Remi and all the children born in the last decade. I can’t go around changing the past because of them.
Oblivious to my distress, my mother winds an arm around my shoulders. “Now who is this young man?” She gestures at Tanner, and he smiles angelically at her. But angelic for Tanner still looks like the devil, and my mom’s hand tightens on my arm, as if to say: What are his intentions? Should I be worried?
“His name is Tanner Callahan,” I say. “He’s a scientist, and he accompanied me on this trip to the past.”
She frowns, and I remember that she’s familiar with the ins and outs of time travel. “Naked?”
“Your daughter’s quick with the afghan,” he says earnestly. “I tried as hard as I could, but I caught only a glimpse.”
My mom tries to frown, and then smiles, and then frowns again. “Tanner Callahan,” she repeats slowly. “Any relationship to the Father of Future Memory?”
Of course she knows his name. Everybody did in this time.
“People say I look just like him,” he says, eyes wide and innocent. “Except Jessa. She thinks I’m way hotter.”
My mouth drops open. “I do not!”
“You didn’t say it. But I could tell you were thinking it.”
“Mom!” I turn to my mother, hoping she’ll put Tanner in his place. But she doesn’t even bother to hide her amusement now.
“He has a point, dear heart.” She smiles broadly at him. Hmph. Figures she would like the cocky scientist type. “But I can’t officially sanction you flirting with my daughter, Mr. Callahan. So would you mind if I steal Jessa away? I don’t have much time to get everything packed.”
“Go right ahead,” he says with a broad, identical smile. He sits on the recliner, crossing his hands behind his head. “I’ll be here.”
Looping an arm through mine, my mom guides me down the hall and into her room. It’s not until she pulls a suitcase from under the floorboards that her words sink in.
“Pack?” I ask. “Pack for what?”
“To go with you and Callie to Harmony, silly. Surely you must know that. Since you’re from the future…” She trails off. “Oh no. You’re from the future. We don’t make it safely to Harmony. Something goes wrong tomorrow, doesn’t it?”
I blink. Wait a minute. Doesn’t she know she’s supposed to stay and act as an anchor? She said she’d received a message from the future. I assumed it was a future memory. But what if it wasn’t? What if it was…me?
No, that can’t be right. I wasn’t here all those years ago. But I was. I am. She said that my future self told her that I would forgive her one day. That time is now, and now is then.
I clutch my forehead. Dear Fates. I’m so confused.
Well, one thing’s for sure. She can’t know how the future will turn out. She’ll try to stop Callie, and little Remi will be as good as gone. Vanished without a trace. As if she never existed.
“You’re the one being silly.” Summoning all of my acting ability, I plaster a smile on my face. “Everything turns out just fine. Look at me. I’m standing right here, aren’t I?”
“Thank the Fates for that. You scared me, dear heart.” Reassured, she moves to her closet and taps a button. The clothes rack begins to rotate, and she grabs her shirts as they pass.
I lick my lips. I have to find the right words for this next part. I have to convince her to stay, or this very moment won’t ever be possible. “It’s just that…you can’t come with us to Harmony tomorrow.”
She grabs a dress that’s about to turn the corner. “What are you talking about? Of course I’m going. You don’t expect me to let my girls go to the wilderness by themselves, do you?”
“Mom.” I grab her shoulders and tug her away from the closet. “You have to trust me. You can’t go to Harmony.”
“Why? Callie can take care of herself, sure. But you’re six years old, Jessa.” She pulls herself to her full height. “You must be mad if you think I’m going to let my six-year-old run away from civilization without her mother.”
I exhale slowly. Maybe if my breaths are even, my words will be, too. “You have to stay exactly where you are because you’re the anchor.”
She blinks. “Is this about your father? Because if it is, you can forget it. I want him to come back as much as anybody. You know that. I love him more than anything in this world. Except for two people. You and Callie.” She lifts her chin. “I’m sorry, but Preston’s just going to have to stay stuck in a different space-time. I will not send my six-year-old to the wilderness with just her sister. And that’s final.”
Heat pricks the backs of my eyes. I didn’t know. I didn’t know she wanted to come with me. I didn’t know she tried this hard.
“It’s not about Dad,” I say hoarsely. “It’s Callie. She’s sick in the future. Really sick. The only way to save her is for me to come back here to this time. She has a condition called Asynchronicity.”
As quickly as possible, and without giving away that she’s been in a coma for the past decade, I explain how Callie’s mind is not in sync with her body. In order for her to find the right time, I continue, I need to plant a seed here in the past, so that we can trigger it in the future.
When I finish, my mom limps to the bed, her dress crumpled in her hands. She stares at the material like she doesn’t recognize it. “Will that actually work?”
I move my shoulders. “It’s the only hope we have.”
She is silent for so long I think she might’ve passed out. But when I peer closer, I see a single tear rolling down her cheek before it plops onto the dress.
“What about you, Jessa?” Her voice is low and anguished, as if her very limbs are being ripped away. “Oh, my baby. Who will take care of you?”
“Callie will,” I lie. I crouch on the floor in front of her, so I can look up into her face. “You know what a good sister she is. These last six years, she’s been like a second mother to me.” I catch her eyes. Time for truth now. The most honest truth I know. “Mom, you have to trust me. If there’s any chance of the three of us being together in the future, any chance at all, then you have to do this. You have to let me go.”
She holds my gaze for a moment and then nods. The dress slips out of her grasp and falls to the floor.