I reach up and press a hand to his cheek, enjoying the scratchy feeling of his stubble against the sensitive part of my wrist. I stare into his eyes. The beautiful gray shines in the moonlight like polished silver. A delicious thrill courses through me as his gaze travels down my face to my throat and comes to rest on the little v-shaped patch of skin on my chest. It’s almost like he’s taken his fingers along that path instead of just his eyes.
And when those same eyes flash up to meet mine again, my heart skips a beat, then pounds so fast it’s like it’s in a race against itself. The want—no, need—is burning so brightly in his eyes I can feel its echo within me.
I move my fingers to the back of his head, tangling my fingers lightly in his hair, then pull him down so his lips are a hair’s breadth from mine. He continues to stare down into my eyes as if they’re not the only things that he’s seeing. It’s like he’s seeing into my soul and seeing me, really seeing me. As terrifying as it is, it’s also thrilling.
“I love you,” I whisper, unable to stop myself. But instead of the sad look that’s come into his eyes every other time I’ve said it, his lips slowly curve into a smile. One that swells my still racing heart to the point it almost hurts.
“I love you, too. Always,” he whispers back, and I have only a moment to think how much I’ve wanted to hear those words without his usual hesitancy, before his lips breach the short distance between us and I can’t think anymore at all.
His lips are soft and hard at the same time, like he’s holding back. I pull him closer, savoring his taste. He pulls back almost instantly, his eyes roaming over my face, that familiar worry gleaming in them for only a second before it disappears and he kisses me again. This time he’s not holding back. I kiss him back, desperately craving his taste. His scent. His feel. Him.
His hands are rough over my body, but I don’t care. He’s making me feel more alive than I’ve felt in a long time with each touch of his fingers on my skin. The stubble on his chin is scratching my skin and I crave every delicious scratch.
He only pulls away for air, but every time, I feel like I’m drowning and hyperventilating all at the same time. It’s too much, yet not enough, and I never want it to stop.
CHAPTER FIVE
During the War it seemed that even Mother Nature was taking sides. While massive rains of almost biblical proportions were only one of her weapons, flooding destroyed many cities and left others cut off completely from the “mainland.” The rains were followed by drought, which left many previously inhabited lands barren.
—EXCERPT FROM A BRIEF HISTORY OF THE 21ST CENTURY
Evie
Gavin and I stand outside the gates, our packs resting on the ground by our feet. The moon has set and the sun hasn’t risen yet, so it’s practically pitch dark. I shiver in the chilly air. While I love the cold, I’m not used to it.
I wonder, though, if it’s really the weather that’s making me shiver or if it’s my nerves. One of the first things Gavin taught me when I was released from the hospital was that I should never leave the gates of the village when it’s dark. There are too many hungry animals that hunt at night. He wasn’t very specific about what animals, but I didn’t really expect I’d stray too far from him and never asked.
Even Gavin appears nervous as we wait. I know he is thinking of all the things that could, and probably will, go wrong. He’s already got his shotgun in one hand and his body is tight as he surveys his surroundings. After a minute, though, he relaxes and picks up his pack with his free hand. He slings it over his shoulder and stares out over the coast.
That nervous energy of his is still humming, and he looks so sad looking out over the water that my heart clenches.
I want to tell him it doesn’t matter. That I’m okay not remembering anything of my past. But I can’t. It wouldn’t be true and he’d know it. Besides, it’s not the only reason we’re going. It’s not even the reason he’s going with me. It’s just my most important reason, so I keep my mouth shut and reach for my bag instead.
The movement causes Gavin to turn toward me. “You ready?”
His voice is still thick with sleep and his drawl even more pronounced than usual. He stifles a yawn and crosses to me. The dark circles under his eyes, barely visible in the pre-dawn light, make me remember he hasn’t been sleeping again. And it’s my fault. We’d done nothing more than kiss, even after I’d let him pull me back to bed, but I’m sure he stayed up all night to watch me, even after I’d fallen asleep. He’s going to make himself sick if he doesn’t get some sleep soon.
I nod in answer to his question, but keep a stranglehold on my pack, twisting the strap in my fingers. Gavin glances down and eyes my bone white fingers, made even whiter by the pressure I’m exerting on the strap. He places one of his bronzed hands over mine. The contrast is striking, but that’s not what causes me to shiver. It’s the warmth of his hand on mine.
He doesn’t say anything, and I look up from our hands to see him watching me carefully. It’s not the look he gives me when he’s trying to see if I’m all right. It’s different this time, and it makes my breath catch.
The sun is just rising behind him and while the sky is slowly starting to lighten, his gray eyes are still in shadow. A lock of his hair has fallen over one of his eyes. I reach up to brush it away, but he grabs my hand and just presses it to his cheek.
My stomach flutters and my heart trips in my chest. I can’t tear my eyes from his, not that I want to, even when the sun comes up behind his head and threatens to blind me. I could stare into them forever and never have another care in the world.
But before anything can happen, Asher tosses his bag at our feet and says, “Mornin’! A great day to destroy our lives, don’t you think? The birds are singing, the sun is shining…”
Immediately I step back, the pack dropping from my loose fingers, while Gavin makes a disgusted sound. He roots around in his bag and says, “If you didn’t want to go, why’d you volunteer to take us?”
Asher shrugs. “Well, it certainly wasn’t for you.”
Gavin gives him a tight smile. “Anything you do for Evie, you’re doing for me. Or did you forget that?”
Asher’s mouth thins into a line.
Gavin shrugs. “But if you want to stay here, stay. I’m sure I can figure out some way to get into the city on my own.”
Asher snorts. “They wouldn’t let you within a hundred feet of the gates without me and my paper.” He pulls a paper from his bag and waves it back and forth.
Gavin tries to grab for it, but Asher only folds it up and shoves it into his pocket, then smiles at me, nodding his head. “And a fine morning to you, Princess.” He wiggles his eyebrows at me and I have to fight a chuckle. It’s obvious he’s only doing it to upset Gavin, and from the way Gavin is fuming, I would say it’s working.
Shaking my head, I say, “Good morning, Asher.”
Gavin glares at him. “’Swear, if I didn’t need you—”
“Well, you do. Get over it.” Asher reaches down for my bag at the same time I do and our hands bump. He gives me another of his cocky grins. “A gentleman always assists a lady with her luggage. Hunter can handle the rest.”
Gavin makes a grab for the bag, but I say, “I can take it,” and lift it before he can. It’s heavy for me, but there’s no need for the two of them to start a quarrel now, especially over something so petty. I refuse to be a bone they fight over. And if they’ve started this stuff now, it’s going to be a long trip.