I knew she was right. But I didn't want the next guy. I wanted Tanner with his easy smile and Clark Kent features. Throughout the day I kept checking my phone for text messages that never appeared.
It was so depressing that not even a compliment from Mr. Metzerol during my voice lessons—and I swear this was the first one he'd ever given me—could bring me out of it.
"Good tone!" he said, nodding vigorously during my song. "You're finally holding onto those notes. You can feel it in your diaphragm, can't you?"
I could feel it in my throat, where I felt all of my notes, but I nodded anyway. I'd never admitted to him that when I sang, my notes didn't wander around my body like they apparently did in his.
Still there was no doubt that my diaphragm was stronger. In fact I'd done so many exercises it was probably the strongest muscle in my body. I bet my diaphragm could beat up other people's diaphragms. It could maybe even rip open car doors and leap over buildings.
In history class, Mrs. Addington let the class go to the library to work on our reports. We were done with ours, so Molly and Polly spent the time trying to cheer me up.
"Only 214 more days until high school is over," Polly told me brightly.
"Yeah, but then I have to go to college."
"College will be better," Molly said. "Because you're not stuck seeing the same small group of people every day."
"No, then I'll just have to worry about running into Tanner on campus." I put my arm on the table and rested my chin in my hand. "Plus the Hilltop has great food and now I'll never be able to go there again."
"Oh, you can go there again," Samantha said, "but only with really gorgeous guys."
Molly tilted her head in mock sympathy. "So that means you'll only be able to eat there, what, every other weekend?"
Why does everyone think my life is way better than it really is?
"It's not like there are gorgeous guys hovering around me," I said.
Molly grunted. "You've been through two since the start of the school year and it's only the beginning of November."
I didn't think getting dumped twice in quick succession was a good thing, but this was useless to point out. I turned to Polly, who was still in the new stages of contact wearing and had looked teary-eyed all period. "Speaking of love, how have things been going between you and Joe?"
Polly fidgeted with the edge of her paper. She blinked but I wasn't sure if it was the emotions or the contacts. "I still haven't worked up my courage to say hi yet."
"It's one word," I said. "Two letters. You don't need a lot of courage to say hi."
More fidgeting from Polly. "Easy for you to say."
"And easy for you to say too. If it doesn't look like it's going well you can turn your greeting into a cough. See, like this," I straightened up in my chair and put on my best actress face. "Hi-aaa—aaa—ack."
Samantha shook her head sadly in my direction. "Is it any wonder Chelsea is so popular?"
Molly nodded patronizingly, "When I grow up I hope I'm as cool as you."
"Why wait to grow up," I said, "when you can work on being cool right now?"
Molly shook her head and held up one hand as though warding me off. "Oh no. No more makeover stuff. I don't need any more hair ripped out of my body."
"This won't hurt," I said. "We'll work on your posture."
Molly leaned away from me. "And that doesn't hurt? You've smacked me in the back all week to work on my posture."
"We'll do something different this time. We'll walk with books on our heads."
With a little more encouragement—meaning that I had to promise I'd stop walking up behind them, yelling, 'straighten up!' and thumping them between the shoulder blades, they agreed to go behind the history section with me.
Samantha came too. She thought the exercise would be easy to do since she had good posture, but her book slipped off as often as Molly and Polly's did. Only I could walk and turn without The World of Shakespeare toppling off my head.
"It's your hair," Molly accused. "You've obviously used industrial strength hair-spray and the book is now glued to your head. I bet you could carry a four-course meal up there."
I did a turn like a model on a catwalk and smiled. "It's talent. Next I'm going to do a river-dance routine."
With her hands held out like she was walking a tightrope, Polly made a successful turn. "If I keep walking like this, do you think Joe will notice me?"
"Sure," Molly said taking a tentative step. "Who wouldn't notice that you're wearing The Atlas of the Medieval World on your head?"
Both Samantha and Polly laughed, sending their books crashing to the floor. That's when the librarian came over and kicked us out of the library.
We walked back down the hallway slowly, hoping that Mrs. Addington wouldn't notice that we'd gone AWOL. Polly tried to walk with her posture as straight as possible. "How do I look? Confident?"
"Or recovering from a back injury," Molly said.
"I think I could talk to him if the time was right," Polly said. "You know, if it wasn't the middle of class."
Samantha said, "He and Garret are having a party after the game on Friday. You should go."
Molly grunted and shook her head. "To a football party? They'd never let us in."
"They would if we came with you guys," Polly said, her gaze skipping between Samantha and me.
I hesitated for a moment. If Polly and Molly showed up and everything went well, then they'd gain confidence, maybe enough confidence to sing whatever Mr. Metzerol threw at them. But if it didn't go well, if people were rude, then they'd hate high school even more, and never listen to me again.
A risky venture at best, but what could I say? Polly wanted to go. "Sure, we can take you." I glanced over at Samantha but she was already shaking her head.
"Logan and I have a date after the game. He asked me to pick anything I wanted to do so we're watching Pride and Prejudice over at his house."
Molly and Polly simultaneously went, "Ohhhh. I love that movie."
Samantha smiled dreamily. "I know. Isn't Logan the greatest?"
Poor Logan, being forced into watching a chick flick. I supposed that would teach him not to go too long without asking Samantha her opinion on things.
"But go and have a good time at the party," Samantha said. "You guys can tell me all about it afterward."
"Right," I said, and made a mental note to ask Rachel and Aubrie to come with me. If all three of us brought Molly and Polly, there would be less chance of anyone being rude.
I spent the rest of the period coaching Molly and Polly on what to wear, say, and do at the party. It turned out that neither of them had ever watched a football game before, and their lack of knowledge on the subject was truly frightening. I told them that they both had to go to the game on Friday so they'd be able to talk about it with Joe at his party.
I was so busy doing this that I didn't check my phone again until after school. That's when I saw Tanner's text message.
He'd sent one sentence: Do you still believe in second chances?
I stared at the message, trying to shore up my resolve. I had to think of Adrian. But then somehow I found myself thinking about the way Tanner had held me close and kissed me. It was a dizzying sort of experience a person couldn't just forget. I texted him back: Yes.
In the card game of life, a good kisser apparently trumps resolve.