Rhinoceros

'Who is Danzer?' Monica asked.

'Just someone we heard about while we were abroad. I see your screen has disappeared.'

'It started again – the missiles, the terrible noise. I fled from the room. When I came back it was still going on so I pulled the plug. I took a taxi to a firm where I know people. Couldn't use the phone. It's dead as a dodo. My friends had experienced the same thing. It's not coming back – the Internet. Don't know about the phone. So I got George from downstairs to take the computer away, to dump it. When he came back he said the dump was piled high with computers.'

'I'm glad you got out in time. I was worried about you.'

'You knew?'

'I'd heard rumours. Incidentally, Buchanan called me in Hamburg. He found the real Mrs Mordaunt had been called away to a fake emergency. He also told me they had rounded up the refugees Marler saw in Dorset – they found them scattered across Dartmoor. Now can I see that newspaper you snatched off my desk?'

'Prepare yourself for a shock.'

She brought him the other newspaper. She handed it to him, opened at an inside page. He stared at the headline, dazed, then slowly read the brief text underneath it.

LORD BARFORD COMMITS SUICIDE

The distinguished Brigadier, Lord Barford, was found dead in his room at the Four Seasons Hotel, Hamburg. He was found holding in his right hand the revolver which had fired the fatal shot. No note has been found to explain why he took his life.

'There's an express letter from him,' Monica said quietly. 'It's addressed to you but, in your absence, I took the liberty of opening it. Here it is.'

Tweed, normally a swift reader, read it slowly three times. He looked out of the window as though trying to see something. He stood up, walked across to Paula's desk, handed it to her, returned to his own desk, again stared into the distance. She read it as carefully as Tweed had.

My dear Tweed – By the time you read this you will probably have heard of my decision. Why did I do it? Because after a long and reasonably honourable career, I made an appalling mistake. Gavin Thunder, who hopes to be Prime Minister, and probably will be after what is going to happen, persuaded me to accept the post of Supreme Governor of a Britain divided into six military areas. On reflection, I realized that, although I thought some change was needed in our way of life, what he proposed -and what I agreed to – was a crime. I decided I could only make amends for my ghastly error of judgement by removing myself from this fragile world. I remember gratefully your friendship in the past. Goodbye.

The letter was signed 'Bernard Barford'. Paula folded up the sheet and looked at Tweed.

'This is awful. Poor man. I don't know what to say.'

'It was his only way out,' Tweed said, so quietly that she only just caught the words. 'He was an honourable man. I shall go to the memorial service, if there is one.'

The letter was passed round to everyone. Afterwards there was a silence in the room that no one seemed inclined to disturb. The intercom Monica had just installed buzzed. She answered it, frowned, looked at Tweed.

'There's someone downstairs who won't give a name.'

'Tweed here. Ah, it's you. By all means, come up. George will show you the way.'

Tweed looked round the room. This will stun them, he thought. He spoke quickly.

'When our visitor arrives do not be alarmed. You are all in for a surprise.'

The door was opened by George, who stood back to let someone walk in. Everyone, except Tweed and Monica, stared in disbelief as the visitor entered.

Oskar Vernon was smiling, as always. He wore a bright green shirt, a pale lemon suit and a wild white tie decorated with clusters of lemons. In his hand he carried a straw hat.

'Meet Oskar,' Tweed said, 'a man who helped me greatly all through the saga we have experienced.'

'I don't understand,' said Paula.

'I can appreciate Paula's confusion,' Oskar commented. He looked at Tweed, who had gestured for him to sit down. 'Maybe you had better explain.'

'Oskar,' Tweed began, 'has kept me closely informed about the enemy's movements as often as he could. Knowing his underworld contacts, I suggested he used his reputation to infiltrate the enemy organization…'

'Some reputation,' snapped Marler, leaning against the wall.

'It has taken Oskar years,' Tweed went on, 'to build up a reputation among the police, the security services and the underworld as being a mastermind behind every kind of villainy. Except he isn't a villain. He detests all the people he has had to impress.'

'I hate their guts,' Oskar remarked. 'So I revel in first fooling them, then destroying them. I arranged for rumours to be spread about my criminal activities long ago, but they could never prove anything. I mean the police. Because I am innocent.'

'Anything else you did to help us?' Tweed enquired.

'Well…' Oskar straightened his tie. '… I did try to kill off those two paragons of virtue, Barton and Panko. In the middle of the night at Tonder airfield I placed a bomb inside their aircraft. But they must have discovered it since they took off safely. On the other hand, I did shoot dead two men of the Special Reserve in the third jeep, coming up behind them in my black Audi – incidentally, just before they were going to kill me.'

'That was a great help,' Tweed commented. 'Otherwise we'd have had seven instead of five enemies to deal with at the sand quarry. Also, Oskar phoned me when I was alone in my room, gave me news of the enemy's latest plans. Without him we may not have survived.'

'One thing puzzles me,' said Paula, 'While I was in Lisa's room someone phoned and said they were Oskar.'

'Not me.' Oskar looked perplexed. 'Anything else strange that happened about the same time?'

'There was a man vacuuming the floor outside. He didn't look like staff and disappeared soon afterwards.'

'Ah!' Oskar beamed. 'That would be Thunder's idea to discredit Lisa, make you suspicious of her. The fake servant would use his mobile to tell whoever phoned that you were in her room.'

'We'd better take you out to dinner for starters,' Paula suggested. 'After all you've done for us.'

'Thank you so much,' Oskar replied. 'But I must decline your kind invitation.' He beamed. 'It would ruin my reputation to be seen with such law-abiding citizens! I must slip away now. It has been a pleasure to work for you.' He stood up. 'Bless you all…'

'Well, I'll be damned,' said Newman when Oskar had left.

'I did tell you, Paula,' Tweed remarked with a smile.

'Told me what?'

'That no one was what they seemed to be.'