“Yeah. I feel a little weird.” He gently squeezes my hand. “It’s not like I had a lot of friends in that office, but it was the first real job I’ve ever had. The first law firm to hire me after I passed the bar.”
He squeezes my hand tighter. We pull into the hospital parking lot and I’m relieved I don’t have to talk about this subject any further. The truth is . . . I’m unexplainably sad that I just left my office building for the last time. My personal life has changed drastically over the past few months. Now having to change professionally as well is a lot to take in.
When I met Damian, I needed a life overhaul, and the path I’m currently on is a stark contrast to the life I was living a mere two months ago. While it’s slightly freeing, it’s also terrifying. But as Damian opens my door and helps me out. As he pulls me into his arms and rests his lips on the top of my head, holding me tightly to him, I’m relieved that even though nothing about my life feels familiar right now, that once again, I’ve lost something close to my heart, this time around, I don’t have to go it alone.
“You sure you’re up for this, Addison?”
I nod and we walk towards the entrance hand in hand. The minute we reach the nurse’s station, I know something is drastically wrong.
“Damian, can I talk to you for a second?” Susie’s voice is grave and sweat begins to coat his palm.
“Is something wrong? Is Emily sick?”
She shakes her head and glances in my direction. “What is it Susie? Just spit it out.”
Closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, she finally delivers the crushing news. “Thomas is trying to ban all visitation rights. He called Rebecca this morning. Said Emily is getting too attached to you.”
My heart is panicking, my mind spinning with how to stop this and I have to wonder if my involvement is the reason for this drastic change. It’s too coincidental that Thomas would come forward with this request the day after I was fired. While I have no idea what Damian’s relationship was with Emily’s mother, I do know that he loves that little girl more than life and he will stop at nothing to make sure she’s well taken care of. The fact that Thomas can’t see that is unbelievable.
Damian’s breaths are coming in deep slow inhales and exhales. Everything about his stance, to the way he’s gripping my hand tells me he’s doing his best to keep it all under control, but I know inside he’s losing it. In as deep and calm a voice as he can muster he asks, “What did Rebecca tell him?”
“She said no.”
With those three words, Damian exhales a huge breath and his body begins to settle. If this fight ever goes to court, it would be in Thomas’s best interest to listen to Emily’s social worker. Rebecca sees her weekly and has first-hand knowledge what’s best for her. I’m sure Thomas will find a way around this, but her refusal gives Damian time to get his own people working on some sort of argument.
“Thank god.” Damian releases his grip on my hand and slides his palms over his face and head, rubbing out the anxiety this conversation just caused.
“It’s not all good news, Damian. Rebecca wouldn’t go along with his demands to block you, but your time is being limited. We’re supposed to monitor you to an hour a day. You know we’ll do our best to give you as much time as both you and Emily need, but don’t be surprised when we ask you to leave. We’re going to do the best we can, but please be patient with us.”
He nods and juts his head in the direction of Emily’s room.
“Yes, go ahead and see her. I think she just finished eating.”
Without another word, we walk silently down the long white corridor. The television is on, some sort of Disney channel and right before we take a step inside her room, Damian stops and rubs his hands over his face one more time. Taking a few more deep breaths, he plasters on a smile and then walks through her doorway. It takes me a few seconds to follow, realizing he’s doing everything in his power to keep it together in front of this little girl. Not allowing her to see the hurt and fear he has for her or for what Thomas is going to do to try and keep them apart. And more importantly, why he wants to keep them apart.
As Addison follows me into the room, Emily starts clapping and her big toothy grin flashes our way.
My heart breaks. I definitely can’t not visit this girl every day she’s stuck in this room until she’s better. No fucking way.
“Thank you, thank you, thank you for coming with him today. I’m so excited you’re here too.”
The sadness I’ve felt coming off Addison in waves all day instantly vanishes. “Of course I came. Who else is going to paint your nails?” Emily’s eyes widen in excitement as Addison pulls out an array of nail polish bottles from her purse.
Kissing Emily on the head, I sit down on the small couch in the corner and let Addison sit next to the bed. I’m working on less than an hour of sleep, spending most of the night stopping myself from banging on Addison’s door and either telling her Megan’s secret or screaming at her for asking me to break a promise to a woman who meant the world to me. I’m not sure if I’ll ever be able to tell Addison the information she wants to know, but one thing’s for sure, I never want to spend a night without her again. It completely sucked and while today started out better, it’s beginning to suck all over again. Thomas Feeley is lucky I’m not jumping in my car and heading over to beat the shit out of him.
That short fuck has no idea who he just messed with. No fucking way he’s banning me from this room. No way in hell. He’s going to be disbarred when my team of attorneys is done with him. I’ve played it cool over the past nine months, fighting when I need to, keeping quiet as to not disrupt Emily’s treatments, but he just pushed it too far. The fucker’s going down and I’m setting it in motion this very second. Pulling out my phone, I send a quick text to my attorney detailing exactly what just happened and what needs to happen next. I’m done playing nice where Emily is concerned. I know what’s best for her, I know where she needs to end up, and I’ll be damned if things don’t go my way.
A little more at ease now that I’ve set things in motion, I sit back and watch as my two favorite girls spend the next hour painting their nails and discussing the latest One Direction song, who got kicked off of Master Chef Junior and how excited Addison is to go see America Ninja Warrior live. My heart expanding with each breath I take, as the two most important people in the world to me get to know each other a little better.
In this moment, I’m the saddest and happiest I’ve ever been in my entire life.
“Did you get word to your attorney?” Those are the first words Addison speaks as we approach my car.
“Yep. They’re working on it.”
She nods and gets in the car.
We drive in silence until I pull onto our street. I have no idea what is going through Addison’s mind, but mine is full of possibilities on how to get Emily out of the situation she’s in.
The deafening silence is interrupted by the ringing of a phone—Addison’s phone. She looks at the screen confused before she answers it.
“Hello?”
Parking the car, I can hear a male voice on the other end of the line and the deep breath Addison takes lets me know exactly who just called.
“Matt, did you change your number?”
Rage boils up in my blood. I’ve already been fucked around once today, I’ll be damned if it’s going to happen again. I get the urge to rip the phone out of her hands and throw it out the window, but I need to tamp down the caveman bursting out of me. Addison’s with me and Matt can crawl back inside the designer magazine he came from.
But then she laughs. And every muscle in my body stiffens as I watch her laugh at something he said.
“You got a Santa Barbara number to ease back into Southern California living? Matt, you’ve lost your mind. I’ve gotta go.”