It really was a different world, but as the girl said,
“You have a wonderful complexion, so you won’t need much makeup to produce amazing results.”
Howard was early, but I was already in Garfunkles when the Colonel appeared. I sat at his favourite table, at the back of the restaurant near the rear door. He glanced at me with a look of mild annoyance and took the table next to me. I was reading a Cosmopolitan magazine and sipping a Cappuccino.
I watched the clock as five pm arrived and the hand moved on. He watched all the girls as they entered. As no one approached him by half past, he finished his coffee and stood to leave.
Satisfied that we were alone, I simply put my cup down and rested my hand on his arm.
“Will you join me, Colonel?” I asked.
He was so cool. He simply sat in the seat opposite me. I knew how he hated placing his back to the room, so I couldn’t help smiling.
“Who are you?” he asked.
“A friend.”
I waved to a waiter.
“Another of the same for me and for my uncle,” I said to him.
The Colonel’s eyebrows rose alarmingly. “Uncle?”
“I know you got the package. I read the email. Where’s the Range Rover?”
He frowned. “Who the devil are you?”
“Where’s Standing?” I asked.
He looked around, trying to gauge whether I was with anyone else.
“I’m alone, Colonel. I always work alone, you should know that.”
His frown threatened to disfigure him.
“I’m afraid I am unused to being at such a disadvantage.”
The waiter appeared with our coffees. I waited for him to leave.
“After we’ve had these, we’d better go for a walk. What I have to say is a little weird, so may take some time,” I said.
“Can you at least tell me your name?”
“You may call me Rebecca, as I’m almost used to it now.”
He took a sip of his coffee, looking at me over his cup.
“Well, Rebecca, why should I go anywhere with you?”
“Because I was in the research chamber and saw Standing’s device operate.”
He frowned again. “Where’s Rob Curtis?
“He’s remarkably well, considering.”
“How can I believe you?”
I smiled, wiping some froth from my upper lip. Lipstick was the strangest stuff.
“You see, Colonel, I’m in what you might call a unique situation. Rob gained entry to the facility, as you requested. He located the main server, downloaded what he needed and left it for you, telephoning you and leaving that message on the answer phone. Then he went back and gained access to the research room, witnessed the device being tested, but was damn nearly killed for his troubles.
“Standing and a security man found him. The security man is called Harrison, I think. Anyway, Rob played possum and heard them discuss the fact that the previous intruder, whom I suppose was poor old Knocker, clogged up the sewage system. Sadly, I believe I can report Mr Armes as having fallen on the field, so to speak. Believing Rob to be on the way out, they put him in a body bag and dumped him a couple of hundred miles away from Buckinghamshire.”
“How do you know all this?”
I looked at him and smiled. Placing my index and central fingers together, I said, “Me and Rob are, what you could say, like this.”
“Where is he now?”
“I told you, safe.”
“Actually, you simply said he was remarkably well considering, so that doesn’t answer the question. Is he all right?”
I laughed. “Never better. You could say he’s feeling like a new person.”
“For whom do you work?”
I laughed again, finishing my coffee. I took out my compact mirror and repaired my lipstick. Putting them away, I relaxed, stared him right in the eyes.
“Up until a few days ago, you!”
He stared at me. “I’m not sure I understand, could you explain?”
“It’s time for that walk, Colonel.”
He nodded and waved for the waiter. Like a gentleman, he paid for me. I smiled my thanks graciously, rose and preceded him from the restaurant.
Once outside he looked at me. “Where?”
“Wherever you like.”
“I thought you were taking me to Rob?”
“I have.”
He frowned. “I still don’t understand.”
“Then walk with me, and try not to look too surprised,” I said, as I started to walk towards Coventry Street.
“The device isn’t perfected yet. It was a small grey box, about the size and shape of a gasmask case, so is designed to be worn on the chest. When activated, it exudes a golden spherical glow all around the human subject. I believe this glow is the field, but the power source is larger than a man. During the test, there was heavy vibration, causing the air itself to wobble. Rob passed out. When he regained consciousness, he was changing.”
“Changing?”
“He woke up in hospital eight days later, in Hull.”
“Hull, how the devil?”
“Harrison took him in a body bag, dumped him in a wood, leaving him to die.”
“Why didn’t he kill him?”
“I think he thought he had. You see, the change must have affected his DNA and molecular structure. As he lay on the floor he heard them talking. They said his flesh was melting.”
“Melting! How do you mean?”
“I’m not sure. There was a weird smell of rotting flesh.”
“How do you know all this?”
I stopped walking, watching the flock of starlings swoop down to the small trees.
“Because, Colonel, believe it or not, I’m Rob Curtis. When I woke up in Hull, I was somewhat surprised to find myself looking like this.”
The colonel stared at me.
“See, I told you not to appear too surprised.”
“This is impossible!”
“Yeah, I thought so too. But I managed to get into my flat, using a key I’d hidden. I logged onto my emails and saw you’ve paid me, so thanks. I even have the Sig you got for me from Switzerland. If you don’t believe me, ask me anything you like, but I’m sure your wife wouldn’t like to know about that young woman in Singapore.”
He stood staring at me, with his mouth opening and closing, but with no sound emanating. I took his arm and literally pulled him along with me.
“This is unreal,” he managed to say, eventually.
“I thought so too, but after a few days as a girl, which, I might add, is not as bad as I first feared, I’m beginning to enjoy myself. Incidentally, my knee injury seems to have been repaired, as have all my rotten teeth. I’ve even got new ones to replace the three I lost.”
“How?”
“I don’t know and I don’t actually care. I do need you to do something for me, though.”
“What?”
“I can’t be Rob Curtis any more, obviously, so I’ll need a real birth certificate in my new name. I’ve managed to get an emergency national Insurance number, but it needs ratifying by a relative. That had better be you.”
“Me?”
“Yes, you, uncle dear!”
He frowned, still unsure about me.
“Look, Colonel, I know this sounds far fetched, and I don’t expect you to believe me straight off. I honestly don’t know how to convince you I’m telling the truth.”
We had reached Piccadilly Circus.
“Tell me about yourself, everything you think I’ll know.”
I did so, running through everything that was on file, and loads that weren’t. I repeated the Singapore incident and the chicken story with the Chief of Police in Uganda. He smiled.