The next morning Felicity looked remote—as though she did not belong to this world. I think she was dazed. My imagination failed me. I could not conjecture what might have happened in that bedroom on the previous night.
She could not go on living with such a man. She must see that.
I said to her: "I am going to ride. Will you come with me?"
She nodded.
When we were riding out together, I said: "Felicity, I am definitely going. I cannot stay here any longer."
"I understand how you feel."
"Are you coming with me?"
"I can't, Annalice. I daren't."
"You know I have to go. I can't bear to leave you here."
"I have to stay. I have made my bed, as they say, and I have to lie on it."
"But you don't have to. You could get out of this marriage."
"I can't. I'm caught. I'm trapped."
"There is always a way out. Come with me. I'll book our places this morning, and as soon as we can get out, we'll go."
"I can't."
"I know what's going on here. I'll be frank. It's no time for pretence. I have seen him go into Mrs. Maken's room and last night ..."
"Oh. Annalice..."
"Yes, last night. I saw. She came in to you. She stayed. Oh. Felicity, this is terrible. You don't have to endure that. There could be a divorce. I'm going to ask Milton Harrington what to do. Come with me."
"He'd follow us."
"He wouldn't."
"He would ... because of the money ..."
"We could try. If we go to Sydney, we could get that ship to Cariba. Milton Harrington will help us. I know. He is very worldly. He would know what could be done. No one has to go on enduring what you have. It's monstrous. Everyone would agree with that."
"I can't bear to face anyone." she said piteously. "I can't bear to talk about it. . . even to you."
"It's got to stop," I said. "I don't trust him. I'm frightened of him myself. I can't stay under that roof any more nights than are necessary. I'm going to book my place on that coach. Be sensible. Felicity. Let me book for you. too."
"I can't. I daren't. He'd kill me."
"He wouldn't dare."
"He would dare a great deal for money."
"Are you condemning yourself to a lifetime of what you have already tasted? Milton Harrington half warned me against him. He must have an evil reputation for people as far off as that to have heard about him."
"I'm terribly frightened, but I should be more so if he found out I had booked on the coach."
"Why should he find out?"
"People might tell him."
"It's a risk you have to take if you want to get away."
"I can't. I can't."
"Then. Felicity. I shall have to go without you."
"Oh. Annalice. please
"I have stayed so long. It has to be now. I can't stay any longer. I have to get away."
She closed her eyes. I saw that resigned look come into her face. I found it irritating. I suppose because it was so alien to my nature. I should never accept what was so repugnant to me. I should fight.
Felicity was no fighter.
But I could not give way again. I kept thinking of that man ... his bloodshot eyes, his whisky-tainted breath. I knew that sooner or later he would turn his attention to me. I was agile; I was quick-thinking. I was strong. But he was stronger.
Resolutely I rode into the township.
I did not look at Felicity for fear I should weaken. We tethered the horses and went into the inn.
At the counter I asked about the bookings.
The Saturday coach was fully booked. There were places on the Monday one.
"What would that be, Miss? Two?"
I looked at Felicity but she shook her head.
"One," I said. "One place on the Monday coach."
I came out into the sunshine, experiencing a great sense of relief, but it was tempered with a sadness and a deep anxiety, because although escape for myself was close at hand, I was leaving Felicity behind.
Two more days and I should be free! Saturday and Sunday—and then Monday. I would get down to the township early so that I should be there in time.
I should have to get Slim to drive me in because of my luggage. He could not refuse.
Felicity looked desperately unhappy. I tried to comfort her but she could only say: "You're going. What will it be like without you?"
"It's not too late," I told her. "There might still be room on the coach."
But she refused.
I was getting my things together. I asked Slim if he would take me into the township early on Monday morning and he said he would do so.
Mrs. Maken said: "So you're leaving us?"
I felt I could scarcely speak to her since I had seen her go into that room with the balcony. I did not blame her so much when I had seen him going into her room, for I had long realized the relationship between those two. But that she should actually go into the room with him when Felicity was there disgusted me.
I said coolly: "Yes, I did not mean to stay long."
"Mrs. Granville persuaded you, no doubt."
"Well, I stayed to be with her, of course."
"What a timid creature she is."
"Everything here is very different from what she has been brought up to," I said.
"Well, the outback is no place for you ladies."
I went up to my room to continue with my packing. After tonight only one more to get through, I kept telling myself. I was longing to get to Sydney. I should arrive in the evening. On Tuesday I would go
to the Botanical Association and then I should book myself in on the Wednesday boat for Cariba.
I had to admit the prospect of seeing Milton Harrington again excited me. I should be able to tell him about what was happening here. I was not going to abandon Felicity. I had to help her even if she would not help herself and I believed that Milton Harrington might have some suggestion to make.
It was just like any other Saturday night, though the merrymaking out of doors seemed more riotous than usual. It was midnight when they dispersed and went off to their own quarters. I heard William Granville come up to bed.
I waited, listening. He went into his room and shut the door.
I breathed more freely. I would give him a little time to settle down and then I would go to bed, not forgetting to put the chair against the door.
Ten minutes passed.
1 got into bed.
It must have been about fifteen minutes later when I heard stealthy footsteps in the passage. I sat up in bed and felt for the pistol. I held it securely and waited.
My heart was hammering. The footsteps had stopped outside my door.
The chair moved a little. There was a scraping sound and it fell backwards. He had stepped into my room. The starlight showed me his grinning face—horrible, lustful and determined.
I leaped out of the bed and stood on the other side of it, holding the pistol ready in my hand.
"If you take a step towards me, Til fire," I said.
He looked amazed and stared at me.
"By God," he said, "you were ready and waiting for me."
"I know too much about you," I retorted. "Get out... unless you want a bullet through you."
"You wildcat," he said.
"Yes. Remember it. You will be sorry if you take another step into this room."
"You couldn't shoot me. could you?"
"I could and I would."
"Murder me in my home ... in cold blood."
"In your home but in hot blood. I am seething with anger against you. 1 loathe you. I despise you. I distrust you. You are not a man. You are the lowest form of animal. Do you think I don't know what goes on here. I wanted to take Felicity back with me but she would
not come. Some misguided sense of duty. Duty to what? You! Who call yourself a man! Stand back. I shall fire if you move."