Jesse ended up sprawled on the floor, scrambling to his feet with his fists at the ready.
“What the hell was that for?”
Joel gestured toward the door. “Outside. And keep this quiet and polite, or you’ll regret it.”
“Fuck you.” In spite of his words, Jesse grabbed his hat and waved curtly to the crew before striding out of the pub, Joel hard on his heels.
Outside it was brisk. The snow hadn’t arrived yet, but the wintery temperatures were enough to cool Joel off. He relaxed his fists and gave Jesse the benefit of a doubt as they stepped into the parking lot and away from any listening ears.
They stopped beside Jesse’s truck.
“I’m sorry for jerking you off the chair. I was worried…” To hell with it. He met Jesse’s eyes and admitted the truth. “I was worried people would see you leaning in on Vicki and think she’s fooling around with you as well.”
Jesse rolled his eyes. “I haven’t touched the woman, and I’m not going to. Who gives a shit what people think?”
“She does.”
“She’s a goddamn Hansol. People already assume she’s fucking most of the single guys in town, and if she’s anything like the rest of her family, half the married ones as well.”
Joel fought to keep his temper. “She’s not her family. We had this conversation before, you remember? So when she cares about what people are saying, I’d appreciate if you gave a damn and helped us out here. It’s not that hard of an idea, giving someone a break. Helping them a little.”
Jesse stared for a moment, pacing toward the back of his truck. His eyes narrowed. “Is that why you’re dating her? As a favour?”
Joel wasn’t going to admit any such thing, not when the situation had changed. “I like her, she likes me. Period. But it doesn’t help that you’re being so…”
Jesse raised a brow. “So, what?”
“You’re a bastard these days.” Joel shook his head when Jesse pulled more faces. “Don’t act like you’re so damn surprised. The past couple months you’ve been hard to work with, and—”
“How the hell would you know?” Jesse demanded. “Calling me a bastard. Hello, pot meet kettle. You’ve gone around the bend since you started seeing Vicki, and I don’t like the changes.”
Joel jerked to a stop. “I’ve changed?”
“Yes. God damn.” Jesse slammed a foot into his tire and stomped away, cussing. He twirled back, anger painting his features. “But let’s get this straight off the start. It’s not like I’m pissed that you’re fooling around without me.”
“That’s what it seems like.”
“Fuck it. Doing the same girl was a kink, that’s all.” Jesse folded his arms. “And I can’t believe I’m saying this, because it’s so fucking emo I should be all of twelve, but it’s the time we spent together I miss, okay? It’s like, you don’t want to fool around with the same girl, fine. That means you also don’t want to hang out with me? Or go to parties? It’s as if you’re fucking avoiding me.”
Joel stared at his brother in shock. “Of course I’m not avoiding you, idiot.”
Jesse lifted a hand and showed fingers as he spoke. “Friday nights at Traders, if you show, you’re sitting with her, or dancing with her, or watching her, or you’re not here. Chores, you’ve been switching out and working with Travis or Matt most of the time. What’s the issue, do I smell?”
It was Joel’s turn to want to roll his eyes, but he kept in control and listened to the continuing tirade.
“I asked you to come out to the party in Red Deer, you didn’t feel like it. You didn’t want to head to Calgary for the concert. You said no to the dance in Sundre.”
“Vicki couldn’t go that night.” Joel swore. “Do you not get this? I’m not on some kind of anti-Jesse campaign, just I’m doing things with her—”
“And Travis and Matt, and fuck, even Daniel and Blake more than me.”
Joel stilled. Really listened. Hell. “You feel left out, don’t you?”
“Oh, screw that.”
“No, that’s what you said, you miss spending time with me.”
Jesse dragged his hand through his hair. “No. Yes. Hell, I don’t know anymore.”
Joel shook his head. This was something he’d never anticipated, and yet suddenly it made sense. “Jesse, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to leave you out. It’s just that Vicki…”
Damn. He was stuck. He couldn’t tell Jesse about her fears regarding their reputation without sharing things with his twin he had no right to share.
“Yeah, that’s the problem, isn’t it? Vicki.”
“Stop pouting like a two year old,” Joel snapped. “I’m trying to figure out what I can say to fix this, but you’re making it damn tough when you’re being a spoiled ass.”
All the good things about the family that Joel had been so proud to show off to Vicki, the opposite emotion seemed to be staring him down right now.
Jesse was jealous. That was the only possible answer, and there was no solution for it. The fact was whichever of them had gotten involved with someone first, the other was going to be left out.
The days of living in each other’s pockets were over.
“Jesse, I’ll work on being around more, but I can’t guarantee I’ll hang out with you as much as I used to. It’s not that I don’t enjoy your company, but I like time with the others too.”
He wasn’t doing this well. Jesse stiffened even more, his usually happy smile fading away. “So that’s it, then. You’re going to give up on family for a girl.”
This was ridiculous. It was obvious Jesse wasn’t listening and didn’t want to hear, so Joel wasn’t going to try to explain anymore. “I’m not giving up on family, Jesse, but I don’t want to stay a kid. And growing up means changing. No matter how much you dislike that, it’s true.”
Jesse nodded, lips set together. “I’ll see you around then.”
He yanked open his truck door and jumped in. Joel stepped out of the way to avoid being sprayed with gravel as Jesse gunned it out of the parking lot and fishtailed onto the highway without stopping.
Stupid, immature asshole. Regret filled Joel, though, that there was a chasm between the two of them. But bar dropping Vicki completely and going back to being at Jesse’s beck and call, he didn’t see a solution.
Even come the spring when Vicki was gone, he didn’t want to return to being Jesse’s stooge. He liked doing stuff with his brother, but he didn’t want to have to rescue him, or bail him out, or follow meekly behind for the rest of his life.
It was time to grow up. This was just the start. What would it be like down the road when he fell in love?
The thought made this weird sensation twist inside, both imagining Vicki being gone, and finding someone new. He was enjoying his time with her very much, and as he rejoined her inside, scooping her up and placing her in his lap to the great amusement of his cousins, Joel found a little respite from his tension.
Vicki cupped his face gently. “You okay?”
He should have been the one asking her, and here she was, caring for him. It was humbling. “Jesse’s sorry. He didn’t mean to do anything to hurt you.”
Joel didn’t feel at all guilty for putting words into his brother’s mouth. It wasn’t strictly a lie. Jesse hadn’t thought through his actions, like everything else he was doing without thinking lately.
Vicki smiled and accepted his kiss, wrapping her arms around his neck as she melted against his body.
“Get a room,” Travis shouted.
Joel pulled back so he could rest his forehead against hers. “Sounds like a great idea to me. What do you say we do that a little later?”
Vicki blushed, and Joel grinned, turning to the table and pouring a beer, ready to spend a few more hours with family.