Something had changed, though, and it had shocked her when she realised it wasn’t all about getting back at Billy for not being the man she had wanted him to be and for not giving her the attention she needed; she realised that she liked Jay, and that they could go far together. Jay didn’t have the clout but she reckoned with a bit of guidance from her they could be good together, make real money. Tanya had seen enough of Billy’s business dealings to recognise that it wasn’t what you knew, it was who.
Opening Emma’s bedroom door, Jay was surprised to realise that she wasn’t at home. The last few times that he had been back to collect his money the place had been empty too, although it didn’t look as though anything had been touched and he didn’t think she would have the balls to do a runner, so she couldn’t have gone far. He was starting to get a bit pissed off now though, and if it wasn’t for Tanya standing in the hallway, he would probably have gone looking for her. Thinking that Emma had probably nipped out for some gear, and was probably doing God knows what to pay for it; he tried to put her out of his mind. She didn’t have any friends anymore; he had seen to that; her confidence was at an all-time low, too, so she wouldn’t speak to anyone even if she did bump into them. He would have to take Tanya to the cafe in the high street and then come back and clean the mess up: he would fucking kill Emma when she finally turned up. Tanya would not be happy about staying there, full stop, but it was all he could do for now. He would have to stop Emma’s visitors for the time being for the few days that Tanya was there. His mind was in a whirl, there were so many things all at once to think about. He wondered what was going on: did Billy know that Tanya had been with him? Did Kate know, too? What would happen to his work for Billy? There were too many questions in around his head. He decided to call Kate. Her phone was diverted to her answerphone; he figured she was probably still in bed.
“Hurry up, for fuck’s sake, Jay,” Tanya called, getting seriously impatient.
“I’m here, babe,” he said; returning to her side and then picking up his keys, he put his arm around her shoulder.
“You can’t stay here, Tan, it ain’t right. I’m going to book you into a hotel.” He decided that her staying here with Emma would be more hassle than it was worth.
“Thank fucking God for that,” Tanya almost smiled, “for a moment there, I thought you were going to make me stay here with the vomit stains and the cockroaches.”
Picking up her bag from the hallway, he trudged behind her out to the car.
“There’s a little hotel on the edge of town; a right little posh place it is; I’ll stay there,’ she said. “Think they have a spa, too, and I could do with a nice massage, my neck’s frigging killing me.”
Jay wasn’t really listening; he was too worried about what to do next. Best thing to do was act normal, he thought; Billy might not know that it was him screwing around with Tanya. For all he knew he was worrying about nothing. He decided that as soon as he had dropped Tanya off at the hotel he would go home, and see what the situation was: surely if Billy was onto him, Jay would have been the first to know. Tanya had said that Billy had brought that bird from the club home, so that had to be it, as simple as that: Billy had traded Tanya in for a younger model. Chucking Tanya’s case in the boot he felt calmer: yeah, things would be fine, he was sure. Opening the passenger door of his beamer for Tanya he grinned and winked.
“Your chariot awaits, madam.”
33
Emma was a ghost of the girl she had been, seriously underweight, her once full chest now shrunken to nothing and her ribs visible through her nightshirt. She had endured so much for the past ten days and felt exhausted. The hospital had kept her in and helped to wean her off her drug addiction, she had been hallucinating badly for the first few days, and at times she had felt so disorientated she had imagined she was back in the flat with Jay. Thankfully the side effects were dying down, but she felt drained and tired all the time. The doctors had recommended medication to ease the symptoms of going ‘cold turkey’, but she had refused; she was determined to beat this herself.
The last six months of her life had become a blur and the bits she could remember were so horrible and dirty she didn’t even want to remember them. She felt so ashamed by what she had become. Emma understood that Jay had done a lot of it, but she also understood how she had caused it to happen too. She had let him worm his way in, behind her friend’s back, and she had put him above Kate, her best friend, and she had got what she deserved and more in the process.
Emma had never felt as happy as she had when she had seen Kate come into her hospital room that morning. She knew that she didn’t deserve her friend’s kindness after betraying her. She had been stupid. They had spent the last hour talking, crying and apologising. Kate had hugged Emma and promised her that from now on she would be looking after her. Emma had been worried about what Jay would say when he found out that she was in hospital and that Billy had helped her, but Billy was adamant that she shouldn’t worry and that he was sorting him out, and even though she was frightened she hoped he was right.
Kate had had no idea of what had been going on; even Billy’s words before he had brought her here were hard to take in. It was like he had been talking about a complete stranger, as if he had made an awful mistake. Seeing Emma was the only thing that had helped the reality to sink in.
Jay had done this: to Emma? He was an animal. Kate couldn’t understand how he could do this to somebody; obviously his motive was money but surely there were other ways to earn it? She was in shock and felt as if she were going to pass out all the time, but looking at her brave friend in front of her, she knew that if Emma could come out of this the other end then she could. She would be strong, for Emma; she owed her that.
Emma had been kept in for ten days, apparently that period was the worst for coming off drugs and she had been given round-the-clock care and regular counselling. After speaking to Billy and Kate, and advising them on the tough few weeks ahead of them, the doctors agreed that Emma could be discharged as an outpatient, but that she was to keep up with her counselling on a regular basis.
Leaving Emma to finish sorting out the paperwork with her case worker, Kate went out into the corridor, where Billy was waiting.
“You okay, babe?” Billy’s concern was clear in his voice.
“Yeah, thanks, I guess I’m just in a bit of shock, that’s all.” Kate didn’t know what to make of the whole thing. Jay was a monster. How could she have thought she loved him? How could she have let herself get pregnant by him? Her poor friend had been subjected to the sickest acts imaginable and would probably never get over them; Emma had been brought so low by Jay that she had tried to kill herself. Kate’s guilt of not being there for her was overwhelming; a whole six months of being angry with Emma and cutting her off because of her weird behaviour, and her friend had needed her. Kate was determined not to cry, though: not here, not yet. “I don’t know what to do, Billy, I can’t go back to Jay’s, I know Sonia said she wouldn’t be letting him back in, but it just doesn’t feel right going back there.”
“Don’t go worrying about Sonia. Ryan’s going to be staying there for a bit, so she’ll be looked after. Why don’t you stay at my house; Tanya’s gone, so why don’t you and Emma have it?”
Kate knew that Sonia would be safe from Jay’s torment with Ryan there; he was not a nice piece of work, and she knew that if he was on your side then you were safe as houses. As much as Kate loved Sonia, she knew she couldn’t go back there, it had been her and Jay’s place too and with the memories and all his stuff everywhere, it would just be too hard. Besides from now on she was going to be taking care of Emma, being the friend that she should have been all along. Moving into a place where Jay could turn up at any minute wouldn’t be wise. Billy’s flat would be perfect; she and Emma could move in and start again. Emma would need as much support as possible; everyone, including the doctors, couldn’t believe how strongly she was fighting her addiction, they had never seen such determination; yet they had warned Kate that she could relapse, so she was going to keep a close eye on her. The flat would be perfect.