Clearly intrigued, he fetched the carton. They carried their brews into the living room, placed them in the center of the coffee table, and flopped on the sofa.
And then, she proceeded to tell him everything. From her arrival and being met by shifters, to her wrenching departure. How she’d cried half the way home and just wanted to sleep for a fucking year and forget any of it ever happened. Except she couldn’t because that’s where Micah was, and where he obviously planned to stay.
When she finished, they’d killed all but two beers and Dean was staring at her, wide-eyed, having not said much for the whole story. Except to interject a question or a heartfelt “holy shit” here or there.
“You think I’ve gone completely off the deep end, don’tcha?” She picked at the label, feeling a bit fuzzy. Too much trauma and too little sleep on the trip back to L.A., throw in some beer on top of a skimpy Lean Cuisine, and it made for one tired, sad cop.
“Christ, I don’t know.” He pushed his fingers through his short wheat-colored hair, making it poke in every direction. “In all my life, I’ve never met a more steady, no-bullshit person than you. You’ve never lied to me. But this…”
“I know it’s a lot to swallow. But it’s true, every word.” She learned toward him, anxious for him to believe her. “I need one person on my side I can talk to about all of this, someone who understands me and won’t judge. It’s always been you. Please don’t humor me, or tell me I’m imagining things because of all the stress. I’m not. It’s real.”
She hadn’t realized she’d raised her voice until he laid a hand on her knee and spoke softly. “It’s all right, my friend. I need proof just as much as you do when it comes to just about anything I’m told. Job hazard, you know? But because we’ve known each other so long, I trust that you’re telling me the truth.”
“You’d still like proof, though, wouldn’t you?” She managed a small smile.
“I’m an agent.” He shrugged, as if that said it all. And it did.
“Thanks for listening, even if you’re still skeptical about supernatural stuff.”
“You’re my best friend, and that’s what friends do.” Finishing off his beer, he set it on the table and watched her intently. “What will you do about this Aric guy?”
“What can I do? He said he doesn’t feel the same pull toward me that I feel for him. Jesus, my guts are churning and I want to jump in the car and drive all nineteen hours straight through to get to him. What kind of stalker does that make me?”
“You’re in love. Give yourself a break. And have you considered that maybe he’s just scared?”
“Of what? Me? Commitment?”
“Wouldn’t be the first man to run, initially. Could be he needs some encouragement. A little push. One thing for sure, you didn’t help your quest to snare him by running home like a whipped puppy.”
She curled her lip. “First, I wasn’t on a quest to snare a man. I didn’t want a boyfriend.” Well, that was a lie. But still, she hadn’t been actively looking. “And second, I didn’t flee the scene like a criminal—I have a job. You know, that thing I do that pays the bills?”
“Whoa, don’t bite my head off.” His shit-eating grin was cute. “Aren’t you conveniently forgetting the job offer the team’s boss made to you?”
Frustrated, she waved a hand in the air. “Hellooo! Aric is on said team, and he practically shoved me into my car and launched me back to L.A. Unrequited love and work partners don’t mix, as you and I well know.”
He winced. “Good point. We’ve both tried that and failed, haven’t we? But I think you ought to reconsider, because I get the sneaking feeling he’s not as immune to you as you think. Take some time, is all I’m saying. Don’t totally rule it out, or you could really regret it.”
A recollection of Nick in his office sprang to mind, placing his fist over his heart.
Just listen to what this tells you.
“Okay, I promise I’ll give it some more thought.”
“Good. Now, what’s to eat around here? I’m starved.”
Some things never changed. And that was really, really great to know right now.
Familiarity was all she had to cling to.
After Dean left, Rowan got ready for bed and slid under the covers. Almost as soon as her head hit the pillow, she drifted off, sinking into sleep.
Even then, she couldn’t stop thinking of Aric. Longing for her wolf.
Reaching across the vast distance, she pictured the field behind the building. Knew that was where she’d find him because she followed the pull. The damned yearning that refused to be denied.
The field appeared, and she found her toes sinking into soft grass. And across the short distance, the man she sought was bathed in moonlight, the glow illuminating his flawless skin, the lean, rippling muscles. He didn’t see her, but stood with his head tilted back, dark auburn hair flowing, gazing at the stars. But he must’ve sensed her, and he spoke in a low voice as she approached.
“Do you believe that’s where we go when we die?”
Moving close, she took his hand. It burned with heat but she didn’t release him. “I don’t know. I’ve always preferred the idea that we stay closer to earth, guarding the people we love.”
He turned to look at her, a sad smile playing on his lips. “Being a creature of the earth, I like that idea better.”
“Why would you be standing out here on a beautiful night like tonight and asking something like that?”
“I wasn’t, originally. I was really just standing here, hoping you’d use that gift of yours to find me.”
Cupping his face, love swelled in her heart against her will. Without her permission.
“And so I did. Make love to me, Aric,” she said breathlessly. With him, she wasn’t a cop, a protector. She was a woman, stripped to her bare essence, and it felt incredible.
“You don’t know how much I want to.” Stroking her face with one hand, he seemed to be memorizing her every feature. “But I can’t. I have to go, soon, and I—I wanted to tell you good-bye,” he whispered.
Fear seized her soul at the way he’d said that. So final. “Where are you going? Is it an op?”
“No, baby.”
“Then what? When will you be back?”
“I don’t know.” He looked away.
He was lying.
“Tell me the truth, damn you! I deserve to know,” she cried, grabbing his arm.
Agony lined his handsome face. “Before you left, I lied. I felt it, too, the pull. I never wanted you to go.”
“Then why? I thought you didn’t want me!”
“Oh, God. Nothing could be further from the truth. But you deserve much more than a loser like me.” Before she could protest, he kissed her lips. Tasted with his tongue, delving into the seam as he pulled their naked bodies close. Then it was over and he backed away. Let go.
“Forgive me for what I did to Micah,” he choked out. “Don’t forget me.”
Then he turned and walked resolutely toward the woods, like a man going to the gallows. She cried his name but she began to be drawn backward, the distance widening until she couldn’t see him anymore. Fog swirled around her and she sobbed, lost, calling for Aric.
“Aric, no!”
She awoke, trembling, staring into the gloom of her shoebox of a bedroom in her apartment. Raising a shaking hand to her forehead, she rubbed, trying to clear her mind of the awful dream. The terror gnawing at her gut right now, her no-nonsense inner voice whispering what if it wasn’t just a dream?
Glancing at the digital clock by the bed, she saw the glowing numbers read three fifteen in the morning. She couldn’t very well call Nick at this hour and order him to check on a grown man because she’d had a bad dream.