What he needed now was to get her off his hands for his peace of mind, which was why they were here.
He liked being with her too much, like providing for her, liked her dependence on him. But the danger had been there all along, that this short time with her wouldn't be enough, that he'd end up wanting to keep her permanently. He'd hoped it would be otherwise, but no such luck. He just hadn't thought he'd feel so strongly about it.
Thinking about it brought back all the old bitterness and anger. It didn't matter what he wanted, he couldn't have her. She was white, he wasn't. White women didn't marry breeds unless they wanted to be ostracized by their own kind. She likely hadn't forgotten that, even if he had for a while. She was amusing herself with him, but she'd walk away without a backward glance when the time came. Hadn't she used him to dispose of her virginity so she could marry someone who would suit? Someone who would suit!
"I'm ready."
Christ, even when she looked ridiculous, she looked good to him. "No, you're not. Stuff that hair under your hat."
She did, frowning at his tone. "Is something wrong?"
"Should it be?"
"You don't really want to take me to a saloon, do you?"
"It makes no difference, Duchess. what I want."
There seemed to be a double meaning there and it annoyed her that she couldn't grasp it. His surliness was annoying too, since she'd thought she'd seen the last of it.
"Then if it makes no difference, shall we go?"
She didn't wait for his consent, or for him. She left the car and marched angrily toward the main street.
Colt jerked her around before she'd even left the sta-tion yard.
"You want to do this damn fool thing, then you'll do it my way. Keep your hat on, your eyes lowered.
You stare at some man looking like one yourself, and he'll think you want to fight. Keep your mouth shut, too. And for Christ's sake, don't cling to me if something startles you. Remember you're supposed to be a man. Act like one."
"Like you? I don't think I can manage that partic-ular scowl, but you've got so many to choose from, I should be able to imitate at least one. How's this?"
The face she made was his undoing. He turned her about and shoved her forward before she noticed the grin he couldn't keep back.
They didn't have too far to go to find a saloon. "Do they brew gold here?" Jocelyn inquired after seeing the sign out front that read "The Gold Nugget Brewery."
Colt wasn't ready for any more of her humor just then. "Trouble is what they brew in these places, Dutch. Are you sure you want to do this?"
"Dutch?" She grinned. "I assume that's a manly nickname and not a nationality. Do I really look like a Dutch?"
"You look like something dragged in off the range," he retorted and yanked her hat down to cover her delicate earlobes. "Christ, this will never work. One look at your face and it's all over."
"But what could happen if they know I'm a woman?"
"Anything, dammit."
She could see he was about to change his mind about letting her go inside, so she backed up toward the batwing doors as she said, "Just five minutes, Colt, please. Nothing will happen in just five min-utes." And she pushed through the doors before he could stop her.
Chapter Forty-one
The Gold Nugget Brewery hadn't sounded that crowded from the outside, but it was. Jocelyn didn't go very far into the room. She wondered if today might be a holiday of some sort, to account for so many people being there in the middle of the afternoon. But then she noticed most of the men up at the bar had plates of food in front of them, and realized it was still the lunch hour — and that she was hungry herself.
"You didn't tell me it was also a restaurant," she whispered when she felt Colt at her back.
"Who you talkin' to, kid?"
She glanced around with widened eyes to find an old-timer in pants almost as baggy as hers, wearing nothing but long Johns and suspenders with them. He was scratching a full gray beard as he eyed the bar rather than her, to her relief.
"I beg your pardon, I was—"
"You beg my. "
He cackled before he finished. Jocelyn grimaced and looked over his shoulder to see what had hap-pened to Colt. He wasn't there. And the old-timer was squinting at her now.
"You wouldn't happen to have an extra nickel on you that you wouldn't mind partin' company with, would you, sonny? Food's free as long as you buy a drink with it."
She dug into her coat pocket where she had stuffed a few coins earlier and handed him one. She realized her mistake at once when his eyes bulged and he nearly broke her fingers getting the twenty-dollar gold piece out of her hand before she changed her mind.
"You must be fresh in from the gold fields, kid. Come on and I'll buy you a drink. Hell, I'm rich now."
He headed off toward the bar, cackling again. Jocelyn wasn't about to follow him. She had started for the exit, in fact, when she was swung back around to see a very disgusted Colt, who'd been standing behind her the whole while.
"I thought I told you to keep your mouth shut."
"He thought I was a boy," she explained quickly. "We didn't consider that. If I can pass for a boy, mightn't we stay long enough to have some lunch?"
"No, we mightn 't," he gritted out irritably. "Have you seen enough?"
"I haven't seen anything yet, actually, but…"
Her voice trailed off and her eyes rounded on what she saw just then, a long gilt-framed picture hanging over the mirror behind the bar, of a woman reclining on a sofa, without a single stitch of clothes on. Colt's chuckle made her realize she was blushing — and star-ing.
"Come on, the view's better from over here. Five minutes, Dutch, and we're out of here."
She nodded and followed him to the bar. It was a long affair, made of carved walnut, with towels draped from it at about eightfoot intervals, so the patrons who were eating could wipe their hands, she supposed. Bootheels were hooked on a brass foot rail which ran along the base of the bar, with cuspidors on the floor by it, placed one to about every four customers. Sawdust surrounded the spittoons, and it was her misfortune to see why as one fellow spat a wad of chewing tobacco toward one. but missed the thing.
When she reached the bar, the man behind it came over to wipe the space in front of her that had some remains of the free lunch on it, and asked, "What'll you have, boy?"
"A brandy, if you please."
"Make that two whiskeys," Colt nearly growled next to her and tossed a dime on the counter.
His scowl was worth a thousand words, making her realize she'd made another mistake. Brandy, very possibly, wasn't even heard of in these parts, much less stocked.
"Sorry," she offered in a small voice.
All he said was, "Hold it, don't drink it," when the shot of whiskey was set before her.
She took the small glass in hand, turned around, and leaned one arm back on the bar as she saw another fellow doing. Colt remained facing forward, but the mirror behind the bar was there and he could see the whole room in that mirror. Jocelyn preferred to view it firsthand.
It wasn't a very large saloon, about the size of the smaller parlor at Fleming Hall. Besides that lewd pic-ture that she refused to look at again, there were other interesting things hanging on the walls: a deer's head, the bleached skull of some large animal, old weapons, the butt end of a buffalo — she blinked twice at that one.
There were a few gambling tables, a faro layout, a roulette wheel, a monte bank, but nothing to take away from the room's main business, which was drinking. In the space of a few minutes she heard such things as Snake Poison, Coffin Varnish, Red Dy-namite, Tarantula Juice, and Panther Piss, all being requested of the bartender, and guessed them to be different names for whiskey. She was almost tempted to take a sip of her own drink just to see why it war-ranted such colorful descriptions. A glance at Colt, who was still watching things through the mirror, convinced her not to.