She awakened to the sound of her name, and saw Paulo flitting through the brush. He called out to her. She did not mean to answer, but instinct took over. “Woof,” she said. “Woof.”
On the cab ride over to his place she broke down and told him what had happened. “Woof,” she said—I’m so ashamed.
He told her not to worry, then hugged her and let her pull him onto her lap. When they arrived, Paulo asked her to remove her tap shoes so as not to disturb the professor. He led her to his cage.
“What will become of me?” she asked.
“I’ll ask the professor to hire you so we can stay together,” Paulo said.
“You’ll ask me what?” said a grey-haired man in a satin smoking jacket and paisley pajama bottoms. “And what’s all this commotion?”
Paulo explained Olivia’s predicament. It was obvious that the professor didn’t like the idea of hiring her, though he begrudgingly said okay. “Except I don’t care for dogs,” he said. “Cats and birds okay, but no dogs.”
Olivia nodded and tried to purr. A good thing she had studied method acting. In the morning, she visited Buzz to trade in her Rottweiler suit for a Coon cat’s. She had a bit of trouble managing the tail-swishing thing, but vowed to do her best because of her affection for Paulo. She found it surprisingly easy to get into character. She chased Paulo around the house, batting him with her long arms and gently biting his behind when she caught him. She spit the feathers from her mouth and he gave her a wicked smile.
“I love you,” Paulo said. “I want to marry you.”
She followed him into the bird cage and he closed the latch and pulled down the ends of the cage cover. For the first time in her life, she experienced the secrets and the glory beneath a man’s bird suit.
Unfortunately, the professor walked in on them. He sprayed them both with water from his mister. “This is all quite unprofessional,” he said, averting his eyes. “Even for actors. You’re fired.”
But Paulo said, “You can’t fire me! I quit.” He gave his employer the bird and he and Olivia quickly dressed and left the house. “I’m in love!” he warbled. “In love.”
Olivia felt deliriously happy. They took a bus to the Coin-Operated Church of Elvis and deposited enough quarters to be married. The happy couple spent their first night of wedded bliss in a nearby Holiday Inn that allowed pets.
“Even a temporary pet deserves dignity!” Olivia said. She and Paulo snuggled in their love nest and talked of opening America’s first giant flea circus. They would place ads in Variety, hire disgruntled pet workers from across the nation to perform. Perhaps the Dandie Dinmont would apply, and although he was sure to come with excellent references, Olivia smiled, knowing she would refuse to hire him.