‘Obviously you were upset about your dad’s death.’
‘Very,’ sighed Cosmo.
His father, he grumbled, had divided his inheritance between Cecilia, his ex-wife, Cosmo and all his step-siblings, except Wolfie. This meant Little Cosmo only ended up with four million, which was quite insufficient, after estate duty, for a growing lad, particularly one intending to own racehorses. Cosmo had therefore decided to augment his income.
‘Give us a fag,’ he added, looking longingly at Gablecross’s pack.
Gablecross, however, was not going to risk it, in case Cosmo’s mother’s friend, the Chief Constable, walked in. He and Karen then learnt that on the night of Rannaldini’s murder, Hermione’s notion of ‘quality time’ had consisted of shoving Little Cosmo upstairs with 101 Dalmatians and a jar of humbugs. Regarding this as insufficient, Cosmo, who had inherited his father’s specialist interest, had borrowed his mother’s camera and crept across the lawn to the summerhouse. Peering through the windows, he had discovered and photographed his mother and Sexton romping on their carpet of lady’s bedstraw. Cosmo liked Sexton and thought he would suit very well as a stepfather. Luckily for his mother and Sexton, Cosmo had taken a mid-shoot break for sloe gin and smoked salmon, and unintentionally recorded both ten twenty-five and ten forty on the large clock on the summerhouse wall.
Although this gave Hermione a vagina-tight alibi, Gablecross had ticked off Little Cosmo roundly for shopping his mother at a time of mourning.
Hermione, who’d just endured another most unchivalrous grilling from Fanshawe and Debbie, was extremely displeased to see DS Gablecross and Karen.
‘I didn’t do it, Timothy.’ She opened her eyes very wide. ‘Why should I want to murder Little Cosmo’s father?’
She might, however, feel like murdering Little Cosmo, said Gablecross, spreading the photographs on the table in front of her.
For a moment Hermione was lost for words, then her face lit up. ‘But, Timothy, these are quite beautiful. Far more flattering than anything Valentin or Oscar could produce. I never knew my son was so talented. They compare very favourably with the work my good friend Patrick Lichfield did for the Unipart calendar. Such a lovely texture.’ Hermione ran her finger over her naked body. ‘And I look so fragile beside Sexton’s manliness. Even in his birthday suit, Timothy, you can tell an Old Etonian by his commanding air.’
Hermione was so carried away, she didn’t notice Karen doubled up with helpless laughter as she fled from the room. Gablecross, chewing his lip, just managed to keep a straight face. ‘But Cosmo was sending these pictures to the Sun, Dame Hermione.’
‘Very enterprising. I told Cosmo he wouldn’t get a penny until probate came through. I know Higgy will adore them. We could even try Charles Moore on the Telegraph, such a charmer. That one of me on my own is so lovely, Serena could use it on the next CD. Bravo, Cosmo.’
‘You’re the kiss of death,’ Gerry Portland chided Karen and Gablecross, as they gathered round his office table later that morning to admire the Live Sexton Show, as it was now called.
‘Moment you start interviewing a perfectly legit suspect — Tristan, Rupert, Hermione — an alibi comes jumping out of the woodwork. I suppose we can assume she was unlikely to have jumped out of bedstraw to murder Rannaldini.’
‘It would have taken her at least a quarter of an hour even to run from River House,’ said Gablecross, ‘and if she’d been out of breath, she couldn’t have sung Elisabetta’s last aria so beautifully.’
‘She’s got a marvellous body,’ said Portland, ‘and knows a few tricks for an old ’un.’
‘Hermione agrees with you,’ said Karen, who was still laughing.
‘I hope the lad isn’t too traumatized.’
‘Camera’s only thing likely to be upset,’ said Gablecross. ‘That boy’s more evil than his father.’
As a result Gablecross and Karen didn’t reach Mallowfield until teatime.
Having admired the grandeurs of River House earlier, Gablecross’s first angry impression was that Rozzy, as a well-known and much beloved singer, ought to be living in a better house.
Clearly no-one had been watering the garden during the drought or washed the milk bottles, sour and queuing up outside the door. The carpets were threadbare, the paint peeling. Flowers Rozzy had obviously arranged beautifully for Glyn’s party the Sunday before last had shed their petals on dusty surfaces. There were no portraits or photographs of Rozzy, even in her radiant youth. Any cups or awards she’d won over the years had been hidden away. The colours were beautiful, but Gablecross had the feeling, looking at shelves denuded except for cards, that most things of value had been hocked.
He was further irritated to find he quite liked Glyn, who had an unlined face, a beer gut, and who was eating pizza, drinking his way down a pint mug of red, and watching Rutshire bowl out Oxfordshire. Half rising to his feet, he apologized, but without much conviction, for the bottles still littering the place from his party.
‘Know I ought to make a trip to the bottle bank but it’s easier to bung the dustmen, and they always come before I get up. Tend to let things slide when Rozzy’s away. But Syl will have the place like a new pin for when she comes home — on Wednesday, isn’t it?’
Sylvia, the housekeeper, was extremely pretty with big blue eyes, a shiny red bob and a regulo-nine smile, which could be turned off as quickly. She was obviously better at keeping herself beautiful than the house. Karen understood why poor Rozzy had sleepless nights over Sylvia.
‘Have a drink,’ urged Glyn. ‘Both of you can’t be driving. Get some glasses, Syl, love. How’s it going at Valhalla?’
‘Must be spooky,’ shuddered Sylvia, as she reluctantly left the room.
‘I gather you had a wonderful birthday party,’ beamed Karen, who found herself sitting very far forward in an armchair stuffed with tapestry cushions.
‘Wonderful,’ agreed Glyn. ‘Syl wanted to help. But Roz insisted on doing everything. Loves to feel needed. I wanted to get in caterers,’ added Glyn expansively. ‘Roz wouldn’t hear of it. We never save any money. Ex-wife costs a bomb, two kids at boarding-school.’
‘When do they come home?’ asked Gablecross.
‘Wednesday,’ said Sylvia, without enthusiasm, as she returned with a jug of orange juice, cans of iced beer and another bottle of red.
So Rozzy’ll be back to look after them, thought Karen crossly. You wouldn’t put yourself out for anyone.
‘Did Rozzy enjoy the party?’ she asked.
‘Frankly, the old girl has been working so hard on Don Carlos, and worrying about the film’s budget and our budget, and tidying and cooking, she retired to bed with a migraine.’
Bet that was diplomatic, thought Karen, accepting a glass of orange juice. Perhaps Rozzy’d caught hers from Tristan.
‘What time did she go to bed?’ she asked, getting out her notebook.
‘Ooo, if we’re going on record, we’d better check our facts,’ said Sylvia skittishly. ‘Around, er…’ She glanced at Glyn.
‘Eight thirty,’ said Glyn. ‘Loads of people were still here. I checked she was asleep at nine thirty. Syl checked her at ten, I put my head round the door about ten thirty and eleven.’
Those up to no good check all the time, thought Gablecross.
‘I finally went to bed around midnight,’ boasted Glyn, reaching for the corkscrew to open the red. ‘Tripped over the landing carpet, woke Rozzy up. She came out looking all in.’
Sylvia got up to put on a record.
‘What did Rozzy give you for your birthday, apart from the party?’ asked Karen.