His abrupt about face had tears stinging her eyes. He wanted her. She knew he did. But she would be damned if she would beg.
“You know, Jesse, there are times you aren’t fit to kill,” she snapped. “What makes you think I need your protection?”
“Terrie…”
“You go to bed, Jesse. See if you can sleep with that hard-on driving you crazy. And while you do, just remember. I offered. I won’t do so again. And I still love you, too.” And she realized in that moment just how much she did love Jesse.
She hung the phone up quickly. When it rang moments later, she watched it with narrow-eyed intent. She was a woman, not a child, and Jesse’s insistence on treating her with kid gloves was getting on her nerves. It was time to show him…
She smiled slowly. Oh yes, it was definitely time to show him that he wasn’t the only one who knew how to seduce. She could play the game just as well, and he was about to learn that lesson quite quickly.
2
Terrie refused to let nerves or fear sway her. The time she had spent married to Thomas had curbed her natural responsiveness, her love of living, and she knew it. After the first month, he had refused to touch her. He had caustically broken down her confidence in herself and her sexuality. Nothing she did could please him. Each touch was dissected for faults and found wanting.
And he hadn’t been gentle in his lack of desire for her. He had raged often, and with cruel emphasis on the fact that it was her fault. Hadn’t he enjoyed sex before her, he would scream? She was destroying his manhood, destroying their lives with her inept responses. What man could want her? What man could desire her with the faults her body held? Her breasts were too large. Her legs were too short. Her hair was too thin. The list went on and on.
Of course, she had known, intellectually, that he was insane. Men had found her desirable before Thomas. But being unable to satisfy her husband, hearing daily his list of her shortcomings had damaged something inside her. If she couldn’t please her husband, how could she ever hope to please anyone else?
The cycle had nearly destroyed her. Having him invite Jesse to the house often, throwing his sexual preferences in her face, then later, after his brother left, cruelly going into detail about how little she could please a man of Jesse’s tastes, had almost broken her.
She had paid the ultimate price for her fear of Jesse’s sexuality. It had been that fear that had driven her into the arms of his brother. A man she had believed was gentler, less inclined to dominate and demand her submission sexually. Sexually, Thomas had demanded the ultimate price. He hadn’t wanted submission; he had wanted something far less gentle. Sexual slavery.
She shuddered as she smoothed the silk stockings up her legs and adjusted the elastic tops before standing to observe the effect in the full-length mirror. The black silk bra and thong contrasted softly with her creamy skin. She narrowed her eyes, smoothing her hand over her flat abdomen, then up to her full breasts.
Beneath the silk of her bra, her nipples peaked, making the small gold ring that pierced her left one weigh erotically on the sensitive tip. Between her thighs, a matching ring pierced the hood of her clit, and the weight there was driving her insane with the added sensation of pleasure.
She was wet, so slick and hot she could barely stand it. The silk of her thong was damp with need, the roughened texture against her bare cunt lips stroking her arousal higher.
Damn, the waxing Tally had talked her into had hurt like hell the first time. But as her friend had predicted, each session was less painful. The rewards had been amazing. She loved being bare. Loved the lift it gave to her sexual confidence, the amazing sense of freedom and added sensitivity had helped heal a part of her wounded pride after Thomas’s death.
Not that another man had touched her there. Until now, she hadn’t found the courage to break free of her own fears and try. If Jesse found her wanting, it would destroy her. But she needed to know. Needed to find out if she was woman enough to hold the arrogant, charismatic sexuality of the man who had fascinated her for years.
She knew what he would eventually want. Knew from her own dreams, her own fantasies that she was nearing the point of no control where they were concerned. She stared herself in the eye through the glass of the mirror. Was she perverted? Depraved? She had felt she was, years before, when she first learned of the Trojans and their sexual practices. When she had first learned she was so in lust and in love with one of the group’s major players that she had known she could and would, if he asked, join in his games.
She bit her lip, fighting her own fears and the morals she had been taught in her youth. Hell, she had broken every rule her mother had tried to drum into her head concerning sex and her body. Why should this one be any different? If he loved her…
“Oh God. I’ve lost my mind.” She threw herself on the bed.
She knew Jesse cared for her. He had to. He had taken care of her for almost three years. Had listened to her rage and cry during those first days when the guilt of Thomas’s death had weighed on her soul. He had held her, holding back his desire for her, and she knew he had wanted her. There was no hiding the erection that had filled his pants those nights.
He had never given so much time to any other woman. Hell, other than Tess, she knew he hadn’t been with another woman in ages. When she asked him about it, he had shrugged and claimed his workload was getting in the way. But he was spending plenty of time with her. Time that he could have used playing. If he had wanted to.
She loved him. She always had. Knew she did. But could she do this? Could she seduce him?
She turned her head, looking at the dress she had laid out on her bed earlier. It was sexy without being crude. The black silk would cling to her curves, without being overtly blatant. The scalloped neckline skimmed the tops of her breasts. The skirt stopped just above her knees. The matching black heels were high, and utterly feminine.
A “dress for success, knock ‘em dead” outfit just right for stepping into the offices of Delacourte Electronics and seducing one of the vice presidents in charge. And she had the perfect reason for going in. The letter that had arrived that morning in the mail. Yet another of Thomas’s hidden debts.
She drew in a hard, courage-gathering breath before moving from the bed and picking up the dress. She finished dressing quickly, knowing her bravery was waning. Thomas’s taunts drifted through her mind as she pulled the material over her head.
Her breasts were too large, he had said. She smoothed her hands over the full mounds. The size C cups of her bra held the flesh securely. Not that she sagged. At least not yet. They were firm and full, but Jesse had large hands. She closed her eyes in pleasure at the thought. And he liked looking at her breasts…hell, he did it often. And his looks were always heated and filled with lust.
She wasn’t very tall. Another of Thomas’s complaints. She never got wet enough, never acted sexual enough. God, she was so wet now she felt as though she was going to drown in her own desire.
He was wrong. She brushed her hair quickly, watching the silken strands as they curled around her shoulders in a fall of red gold. Not much makeup. She didn’t need a lot, and rarely wore it. She didn’t want to come off as seductive, but she wanted to seduce.
She was lotioned, waxed and scented from head to toe. Dressed and ready and shaking with nerves two hours later when she walked into Jesse’s outer office. Tally’s head raised, her brown eyes widening just a bit as a smirk crossed her lips. Terrie prayed she wasn’t blushing.
“Should I take my lunch break now?” the secretary drawled in amusement as she sat back in her chair and watched Terrie walk across the room.
Terrie swallowed tightly. “Quick, tell me again what Thomas was?”