Todd: Gotta go. See you all tonight. Congratulations.
Me: Thank you, guys.
Tatiana: How did this convo get so polite?
I click on a private text to Tatiana.
Me: Nice, Tati.
Tatiana: What? If you weren’t convinced before, you should be now. The boy wants you.
Me: I don’t know.
Tatiana: Yes, you do.
Me: Tati, what am I supposed to do?
Tatiana: Follow your heart.
I don’t respond to her. I can’t. I’m still grasping on to this different Todd who keeps emerging ever since Davis left town.
Shit. Davis.
I haven’t told him.
I flick to my calendar on my phone and see the heart in that box on that Friday.
His premiere. My plane ticket. Crap.
Not wanting to mention the conflicting date to him just yet, I place my phone down to think.
“Amelia!” Bette’s voice comes over the speakerphone.
I quickly press the Talk button. “Yes?”
“Come in here to discuss exactly what I want.”
My nerves spin out of control. I grab my notebook and pen, leaving my phone on the desk.
* * *
I insert my key into the lock, and the scent of garlic floats out of my apartment. Tatiana and Todd are dancing around the kitchen and singing.
The music is too loud for them to hear me enter, so I stay against the door, watching them laughing and goofing off. Without them, I’m not sure where I’d be. They believe in me more than I do.
Tatiana spots me first. “She’s here!” She runs into me with such force that I stumble back. “I’m so happy for you.” She holds me tight and jumps up and down.
Todd’s arms wrap around both of us, and he kisses my temple. “Congratulations. You deserve this and more,” he whispers.
My shoulders fall while I’m in the arms of my two friends. “Thank you, guys.”
They grip me tighter.
“I made your favorite tonight.” Todd disappears back to the kitchen.
I follow. “With Tatiana’s help?” I cock my eyebrow.
“She’s good for those menial tasks.”
Tatiana pushes his arm and he fake-stumbles backward, laughing the entire time.
I hop up onto a barstool at our kitchen counter. Todd poises a spoon right at the tip of my lips. I slurp the garlic sauce into my mouth and can’t help but notice Todd’s eyes on me. His intense stare confuses me, but I crave more of it.
His eyes dart to my cleavage as I’m leaned across the counter, and then he looks back to my eyes. Last, they fixate on my tongue as I lick the sauce from my lips. My breathing stutters, and I slowly back up from his closeness.
My phone chirps, and I jump in my seat. Todd’s eyes glance at it, and a sour look crosses his face. He ventures back to the stove, and I grab my phone.
Davis.
I haven’t talked to him since he left. He must be crazy busy.
“Hello?” I practically whisper from the guilt. Sometimes I feel because Davis and Todd’s relationship is so strained, I’m somehow wronging the other.
“Hey, beautiful.” Davis’s sweet voice fills my phone.
Instead of the calmness that usually overcomes my body, I’m on high alert.
“Hold on, okay?” I hold my phone to my stomach. “I’ll be right back,” I say. I turn around before having to see Todd’s face.
Neither Todd nor Tatiana makes a crude joke or even acknowledges that Davis is calling me. Both of their actions speak volumes about what has changed in only three days since Davis has been gone.
I shut my bedroom door and sit on the bed. “How’s LA?”
“It’s great, but they’ve had me running everywhere. I’m sorry I haven’t called.” He sounds sympathetic about not being able to talk at all lately.
I shouldn’t doubt him just from what Heather told me.
“It’s okay. I missed you.” I lie down, throwing my free arm over my eyes.
“Why the past tense? Do you not still miss me?”
“Oh, no! I still—”
“Relax, Amelia. I was just kidding.”
I suck in a deep breath.
“I miss you, too.”
“Still a month?”
“Unfortunately, yes, but only two weeks until the premiere.”
“Oh, shit, Davis.” I jolt up in bed, and suddenly, those nerves overtake me again.
“What? Are you okay, Lia?” His voice is frantic.
I realize I just scared him for no reason. “Yeah. Oh, I’m fine, but I have some bad news.” My teeth nibble on my bottom lip. “Bette gave me my own show.”
“What’s bad about that? Congratulations.”
“It’s the same weekend as the premiere.”
“Oh.” His voice lowers, and guilt racks me. “That’s the only date she can give you?”
“It was from a cancellation by another artist. That’s the only reason I got it. I’m sorry, Davis. I’ll reimburse you for the ticket,” I ramble, with the hope that my excuse is enough to throw away the cost of the first-class plane ticket to LA he already purchased for me.
“Oh.” It’s a simple word that speaks more.
“I’m truly sorry, Davis, but this is it for me. I’ve worked hard, and I’ve been waiting for this day. I hope you understand I cannot pass this up.”
Fear sets inside of me as I think this is it for us. He’ll give me an ultimatum, but I’m through with pushing my needs aside to please a man.
“Amelia, what do you take me for? A jerk who wouldn’t be happy for you?” His voice is even-keeled.
That scares me more than if he were yelling obscenities into the phone.
“No.” I release a breath into the receiver. “I’m just sorry. I feel bad.”
“It’s only a few hundred dollars for the airline ticket. I have been looking forward to it, but I understand.”
I finally relax, happy he isn’t giving me an ultimatum. “Thank you.”
“You don’t have to thank me.”
The receiver muffles, and I hear him saying something.
“I have to get going. It’s time to judge my contestants’ foods. Hopefully, I won’t end up in the emergency room.” He laughs, and the carefree, relaxing tone reflects back.
“I’ll cross my fingers. I’m at the hands of Todd for my celebratory dinner tonight.”
“Todd’s there?”
“Yeah.”
“Man, Lia, I wish I were there to cook you dinner for your celebration. This distance thing sucks.”
“I know. It’s a month, right?” I allow the negative thoughts that a month is too long to enter my brain.
After such a short time, my feelings for Todd are resurfacing at a pace I’m not comfortable with, a pace that can surely finish Davis and me before we truly ever started.
“Yeah. Okay, I have to go. I’ll call you in a few days.”
“A few days?” The question leaves my mouth before I realize I’ve spoken it out loud. The last thing I want to be is a needy girlfriend.
“My schedule is insane. I’ll try sooner, but I don’t want to promise anything I can’t keep.”
“Okay. Miss you.”
“Miss you. Bye.”
“Bye,” I murmur to a dial tone.
I fall into my plush mattress in complete distress of what my life is turning into. I need to focus on my career and not worry about two guys who might just toss me aside for their own careers.
* * *
The next day, I’m happily sitting at my desk before Bette arrives for the day. I came in a whole half an hour early to complete the piles of work so I can get some pictures of Todd tonight. Coincidentally, we both have the night off from CHOPs, and I need to get these done.