No! NO! NO!
Then Grant looked at the radio operator.
“How soon can we get a helo in?”
We waited while a flight was arranged for oh-six-hundred hours, then Grant turned to me.
“Send Ms. Venzi in. She should know that her friend … she should know.”
“Yes, sir.”
When I went to find her, Caro could tell by the look on my face that something was wrong.“
What is it? What’s happened?”
“Grant wants to see you,” I said, ignoring the curious gazes from the other men.
She stood up stiffly and followed me into the office.
“Please take a seat, Ms. Venzi,” Grant said gently. “I’m afraid I have some bad news for you … I told you yesterday that we picked up some veiled threats to you; well, it’s become much more direct. The Taliban have heard that you’re with us—and they’re viewing you as a prize kill.”
For fuck’s sake! Did the asshole have to say it like that?
“They’re aware of the value of publicity,” he continued, “and I’m afraid earlier today, they killed another journalist—a woman. I’ve called in a helo to evacuate you back to Leatherneck as soon as possible first thing in the morning. Ms. Venzi? Ms. Venzi?”
Caro looked up at him, stunned. “Who?”
“Excuse me?”
“Who was the journalist they killed?”
Grant glanced over to me.
“Liz Ashton,” I said gently.
Caro dropped her head into her hands, and I could see her fighting back tears.
“I’m sorry,” Grant said uncomfortably.
Caro looked up and nodded slowly. “She was my friend.”
“I’m sorry,” Grant said again, “but we can’t risk our mission here and…”
He bit off what he was going to say.
“How did she die?”
Grant looked away, leaving it to me to give her the gory details.
“Sniper,” I said. “She died instantly.”
I didn’t know if that was true, but it’s what we always said to families and friends. No one needed to hear that their son or brother had died screaming in agony with his legs and arms blown off and his stomach lying on the floor in front of him. You didn’t forget that shit. Ever.
Grant tried to say something comforting, but I don’t think Caro heard him. She walked out of his office, and I started to reach for her but she ignored me and walked past.
I wasn’t sure what to do—what she’d want me to do. But Grant made the decision for me.
“Give her ten minutes then check on her, Seb.”
“Yes, sir.”
I’d never been more happy to obey an order.
I gave it five minutes, then headed for her room. When she didn’t answer, I tapped on the door and pushed it open.
Caro was curled up in the corner, her arms wrapped around the knees, muttering the same words over and over again.
“Put out the light, then put out the light.”
It didn’t make sense to me at first because there weren’t any lights in her room. And then I recognized it as a line from Shakespeare. I didn’t know which play and I didn’t care. My girl was hurting and there was nothing I could do.
I shut the door behind me quietly, then sat down next to her, pulling her into my arms. I didn’t speak, I just rocked her gently, dropping soft kisses into her hair.
After a while, I felt her body relax against me, curling into my chest.
“I’m so sorry, Caro,” I said quietly. “I know she was your friend.”
She didn’t reply, so I just held her.
Night fell and the room was filled with shadows and darkness. Outside, I could hear the sounds of men changing watch and I sighed. “I’d better go, or Grant will wonder what the hell we’re doing.”
I shifted her off my lap and started to stand up, but she grabbed hold of my hand.
“Don’t go, Sebastian, please. It doesn’t matter who knows about us now—I’m being sent home anyway. Let me spend my last few hours with you.”
I sank down again. “I was hoping you’d say that,” I admitted.
I didn’t care if it fucked up my career: Caro needed me, that was what mattered
We lay on the mattress, fully dressed, our arms and legs tangled together.
“I’m not very good at gardening,” she said thoughtfully.
I was confused by her random comment.
“What’s that, baby?”
“I can’t grow things,” she muttered into my chest. “Plants seem to wither when they see me. Can you grow things?”
“I don’t know, Caro. I’ve never tried.”
“I’d like to plant something,” she whispered, “see it live and grow.”
Now I understood: she wanted to make a garden, create life; a way of evening up the balance of loss in some small way.
I pulled her against me more tightly and stroked her hair.
“Does your place in Long Beach have a backyard?”
“Yes,” she sighed. “It could be pretty. Remember Signora Carello’s bougainvillea? Maybe we could grow something like that.”
I kissed her hair again. “Baby, I can’t even spell bougain … whatever it is, but I guess I could try. Was that the purple stuff?”
She nodded.
“Okay, baby. We can grow purple stuff.”
“And pink?”
“Sure, baby, with yellow fucking stripes if you want.”
“Okay.”
I was hoping she might sleep after that weird-ass conversation, but she didn’t. I lay watching her, but every now and then I’d see the glint of moonlight in her eyes and know that she was awake.
As dawn started to filter through the compound, I sat up slowly, pushing the tiredness away.
Caro didn’t speak as she packed up her gear, so I watched in silence.
“I’ll miss having you here,” I said, at last. “But I’m glad you’re getting the fuck out of this shithole.”
She wrapped her arms around my waist and leaned into my chest.
“Just come home safe, Sebastian. No heroics, please.”
“The only thing you’ve got to worry about is when I self-combust, especially if you’re going to send more letters like that one you wrote me yesterday.”
My dumb joke fell flat, and she tugged at my uniform.
“I mean it. Stay safe.”
I sighed and nuzzled her hair, treasuring the scent that was all woman, all Caro.
“I’ll do my best, baby. Promise.”
Then I lifted her chin with one finger and kissed her soft lips.
“Fuck, I’m going to miss you, Caro.”
“I love you, tesoro. So much.”
I held her face between my hands and gazed into her eyes so she’d know that I meant what I said. “Sei tutto per me.”
You mean the world to me.
She smiled sadly, so much love in her tear-filled eyes. But our moment was over, and it was time to go.
I carried her bag out to the quad, ignoring the stares of the other Marines. Grant and Sanders came out to shake hands with her, and several of the other guys that I’d seen her talking with over the last few days lined up to give her awkward, one-armed hugs. Probably the first and last time that I wouldn’t mind other men touching her.
As soon as we heard the helo, eight armed Marines escorted her to the pickup point 200 yards outside the compound.
Touchdown was less than five seconds and Caro was yanked inside before the helo offered too easy a target to the Taliban squatting in the foothills.
I stood and watched the bird leave. I didn’t wave.
Grant called me into his office immediately. I thought it might have been to ask me how well I knew Caro, but I guess now she was out of sight and not his responsibility, she was out of mind.
“Seb, we’ve got to move up the mission. I want you ready to move out in an hour. The Taliban know way too much about our movements. Jankowski and 14 men will go with you. Daypack for three days—leave everything else here.”