I frown. “He’s going through with it?”
His eyes meet mine and my heart flutters in my chest. He nods. “I can’t stop him...so I’m going to help him instead.”
My lips part as a shaky breath lets itself out. Mixed emotions swirl through me—worry, regret, anxiety. I’m not ready for this. I want to stay in this bubble forever—far removed from the rest of the world. I’m a different person here and I’m happy. I’m finally happy.
“I’m not going to sugar coat anything for you guys...” Jai clears his throat, his stare flicking between Ted and Huss. “There’s a good chance we won’t make it back here. A handful of us against an army of them? It’s obvious the odds aren’t in our favor.”
Huss and Ted exchange glances as Jai takes a short pause.
“So I’m giving you guys an out. You can leave right now no questions asked. No judgement.”
Ted lets out a laugh and it turns nervous when he realizes Jai isn’t kidding.
“Oh.” A single lingering chuckle bubbles out of Ted. “You’re serious?”
Jai nods. “I’m serious.”
“Un-fucking-believable.” Ted runs the heavy palm of his hand over his face. “Do you know what I do at the precinct? Every morning I wake up, put my uniform on, strap in my gun, and I drive my ass to work. You know what they make me do when I get there?”
Jai shakes his head.
“Traffic control. Can you believe that shit? I became a cop to defend the innocent and catch bad guys. That’s what I was born to do. Instead, I babysit road workers and occasionally direct a vehicle. It’s not fulfilling. It’s not what I signed up for. So I’ll tell you what I’m going to do. I’m gonna defend the innocent and catch the bad guy for once. Then I’ll back to directing traffic.”
Disappoint flashes over Jai’s face, but he recovers quickly, flicking his stare to Huss. I can tell by his face Jai thinks Huss will definitely bow out, but I think Huss enjoys the challenge.
“When do we go?” Huss asks, plucking the slender, yellow petals from another Helenium.
“You’re not going to be very useful, Huss.” I point out. “You couldn’t even put your shirt on this morning without my help.”
He flicks a perfectly shaped eyebrow, his expression coy and smug. “Maybe I could.”
“We go in tomorrow night—and Emily is right. You can’t help, not in your state.”
“So I’ll keep the engine warm.”
Ted shakes his head. “Jord—”
“Don’t Jordan me.” Huss cuts in, turning his glare on Jai. “I supplied the floor plans, I noted the weak entry points—in detail—and I supplied most of the tactile equipment. Do you know how much I have risked and continue to risk for you and your brother? I’m not backing off now and I’m definitely not sitting this one out. No fucking way.”
Ted shrugs. “Suit yourself. What do we need to do to prep for tomorrow?”
“Spend today doing whatever you need to do,” Jai tells them. “but tonight we’re going to have some fun.”
Huss cheers up, swiftly pushing himself into a sitting position despite his busted ribs. “What kind of fun?”
“We’re going out.” Jai looks at me, his expression cloud free. “Darts...drinking...dancing. There’s bound to be a shitty, little bar we can destroy around here somewhere.”
I smile, surprised he wants to take me dancing. His gesture reminds me of something I heard in passing when I nursed at the hospital. An old woman was telling her daughter that there’s something beautiful about a man who listens and that if she ever finds one, she should hold on tight and never let him go. I didn’t understand it at the time. Why would such a common thing be beautiful, right? It isn’t until this very moment I realize what she meant. It’s not the act of listening that is beautiful, it’s the subtle way men process what you’re saying. They might not say anything or even act on it right away, but they store it in their brains and wait for the perfect moment to show you they listened. That’s why a man who listens is beautiful.
And that’s why I know I should heed that old woman’s advice. If only it was that simple.
“What if one of Skull’s people see you?”
Jai shrugs his powerful, broad shoulders at Ted, his indifference rippling through his muscular body and projecting on to everyone else. It’s sexy and the possibilities of how we’ll spend our last night race through my mind. A strange warmth blooms in the nape of my neck and surges south. I don’t care how cold it is I’m still down for swimming naked…provided it’s in a heated pool.
“Going by Huss’s outcome statistics he so kindly wrote up for us, we’re dead anyway. Might as well enjoy our last night.”
“I’m down.” Ted announces with an excited clap of his hands and a clench of his fists. “How long has it been since we hit the town?”
A smirk spreads over Jai’s lips. “A while.”
Ted laughs, unable to stop his body from vibrating with happiness. “I am pumped!”
With a heavy groan he tries to stifle in his chest, Huss forces himself to his feet, his own body exuding excitement in its light movements. I suck air in between clenched teeth. Will I be the one who tells him he can’t drink because of the pain killers and antibiotics he’s taking? Screw it. The poor guy is probably going to die tomorrow anyway.
Ted sizes Huss up with wide, golden eyes as Huss settles into the space beside him.
“You are not coming out in that pink shirt.”
“It’s salmon!”
“It’s pinker than the—”
“—nipples on an albino.” I say, shielding the sun from my eyes. “You’ve already used that one.”
“Really?”
I nod. “Yesterday morning and it prompted Huss to ask what color—”
“—you think the shirt is.” He cuts in, panic flashing across his handsome, but boyish face. “I asked you what color you think the shirt is.”
I tilt my head to the side unable to stop the wide grin from spreading across my lips. He’s not owning up to what he said because Jai’s here? Now who’s scared?
“Oh really? That’s not what I recall you asking.” I turn my attention to Ted. “What was it?”
“If I remember correctly, you asked what color her nip—hey! Where are you going?”
Over his shoulder, Huss flips Ted off as he storms away, as best he can with a limp, and enters the house. I roll my eyes. Jordan Hustel may look like a man, but he acts like a boy. I don’t know much about relationships and the opposite sex, but I do know males who look like men but act like boys are the worst. A man accepts his responsibilities and protects what’s his. A boy panics, is irrational, and will bail at the first notion of impending responsibility.
Huss is a boy.
Jai is a man.
Jai’s eyebrows draw together into that frown I like so much. “Am I missing something?”
Ted chuckles, rubbing the back of his neck with a swift hand. “I’m gonna go reheat some of the breakfast leftovers and then take a nap.”
He slaps Jai on the shoulder and disappears behind his wide frame, leaving us alone. I swallow hard as Jai removes his hands from his pockets and saunters closer to me. There’s no ignoring the pound in my chest the closer he gets.
Thrum.
Thrum.
Thrum.
Seeing him in broad daylight never ceases to amaze me. I don’t think I’ll ever grow tired of it. In the dark tunnels he was mysterious and sexy, his rough, skin tingling voice adding to his dangerous persona, but out here in the light, there’s a sweetness to him. Out here shadows don’t obscure his face.
Out here I see his softer side.
Underground he was precarious. For a short time, he convinced me he was like everyone else down there—a soulless human being, desperate to win the respect of a murdering psychopath. I truly believed Jai was cruel and selfish, uncaring who he hurt on his way to the top to save his corrupted brother.
A brother he so easily murdered for.
What I didn’t see was what the shadows hid. Occasionally, he’d move into a position that allowed the murky glow of the storm lights to illumine his face, chasing away the shadows. In those moments, I saw snippets of the good man he could be and that swayed me to trust him. I’m glad I did. Since emerging, the light has revealed emotions and habits I didn’t have the pleasure of witnessing underground. Like the concern in his face before he makes a difficult decision and the worry that wears down his mind, body, and soul whenever he thinks about his little sister. I’m thankful for the light. I’m thankful I get to witness all of his emotions as they flicker through his eyes and downturn his lips. The light revealed the parts of him I needed to see—the parts that have made it almost impossible for me to ignore the overwhelming flurry of emotions in my chest. It revealed to me that maybe I am capable of letting someone love me and care for me...and maybe, just maybe, I am capable of loving someone in return. It’s in this light that I can’t help but notice my life is the brightest it has been in a long time and, for once, it’s because of someone else...because of the way someone makes me feel.