Annie withdrew her hand sharply. “I am!”
“Then, stop comparing the two! What you had with Michael was very powerful and probably something you’ll never feel for another man again. It self-combusted before your eyes. You should be glad Jay is different.”
Annie wiped at her cheeks. “I was only using Michael as an example, Dara. I know it’s doubtful I’ll ever feel that same kind of magic again with someone else and that’s so sad. Maybe there’s truth to the saying, you only have one soul mate.”
“Annie, don’t sound so down,” Dara comforted. “You’ll feel love again, I promise. If not with Jay, then with another gorgeous hunk, but you will find someone.”
Annie forced a smile onto her tear stained face. “And God help me if he turns out to be another musician!”
CHAPTER THIRTY
It was the day after Annie’s birthday. She sat at the end of her boat dock, in a low slung beach chair, with Angel napping contentedly in her arms. It was warm and sunny, without the humidity of August. She was dressed in a tiny pair of denim shorts and a bikini bathing suit top, with her hair pulled back in a loose ponytail.
She squinted at the sun and closed her eyes. She thought of her current age and how most would consider the number young in years. But inside, her soul felt amazingly old, like she had the wisdom that came with that of a grandmother.
Quietly, she contemplated the arrival of Jay later in the week and the birthday celebration she knew they’d have. They had been together for nearly three weeks and she was finally starting to think she was ready to take their relationship to the next level. She knew he was ready but still patiently waiting for her. How bad could a summer romance be, she thought? Maybe Jay was exactly what she needed.
She reflected on the phone conversation they had had the previous day and how distressed he seemed at not being able to share her birthday with her. Truth be told, she didn’t see much point in acknowledging the day with him or anyone else. There was nothing to celebrate. In her mind, it was a day like any other.
The sun had reached its crest and had begun its decent from the summer sky but Annie and Angel remained soaking up what remained of the heat. Behind her, Mabel, the nanny, played with Sammi on the beach by the house deck. The tide was easing its way back out to sea while the gulls overhead sang their mournful song. She drew a long heavy breath into her lungs and exhaled slowly. Her life was as it should be, she thought. It was peaceful and calm. Everything she wanted and loved was right there with her. What more could she ask for?
Annie had almost drifted off to sleep when she heard screams of caution coming from the nanny. In an instant, Annie was awake and turned around to face Mabel.
“Annie! Annie! You have company,” the nanny warned. “Do you want me to call the police?”
Every hair on Annie’s body stood on end and goose flesh quickly covered her skin. “Mabel, it’s okay!” she replied, her eyes drifting in the direction of the intruder. Then she cursed silently when the image of the man came into focus. “Take Sammi inside, please,” she instructed. Then she slouched back into her chair.
In mere seconds, the serenity in her life would be gone. She turned to the ocean and braced herself for the unwelcome visitor approaching on the dock. In an act of protection, she covered Angel with her baby blanket, as if trying to conceal her presence. Then she swallowed hard and squeezed her eyes tight together. Every thud of his boots made her heart beat harder. Why was he here? What did he want? Her mind swirled with a thousand questions, creating a vacuum between her ears until it hurt.
Then he was beside her, tall, mysterious, and as handsome as ever. His long hair still brushed the tops of his impressive shoulders and the same chiseled features that had haunted her dreams remained. The paleness of his ice blue eyes were hidden behind dark sunglasses and for that, she was grateful. She had never been able to resist the strength of them. She turned her head toward him and his full, brooding lips eased into a nervous smile. The hard outline of his features melted when her eyes met his. She noticed thin wisps of gray that now framed his face, which only enhanced his natural masculinity. He was aging with grace and she hated him for it.
Her eyes dropped to his chest. The white t-shirt he wore outlined the flatness of his stomach perfectly. His hands were plunged deeply into the pockets of his black jeans. He smelt clean, fresh, and very obviously sober.
“Hi, Annie. Happy birthday,” Michael spoke in a gentle tone.
His voice sounded like the music to a long forgotten song that she was hearing again for the first time in years. She closed her eyes to fight the emotion from racing through her body.
“You’re supposed to arrange visitation through our lawyers,” she replied in broken syllables, without looking at him.
“I know,” he sighed. “But I was afraid if I had warned you I was coming, you wouldn’t have been here.”
“You’re right, I wouldn’t have been,” she answered quickly.
From the corner of her eye, she watched as his head turned to scan the horizon. His jaw was set tight but his body language remained relaxed. She watched the way his jaw muscle tensed in spasm and tired to imagine what was going through his mind. Then her eyes drifted to the soft hollow beneath his chin. She closed her eyes tightly when the memories came slicing to the front of her brain. She could remember the way his skin tasted, the softness of his throat and face after he was freshly-shaven and the way her lips effortlessly slid across the back of his neck and shoulders.
Then, as if she sensed her mother was losing control, Angel began to coo happily and squirm in Annie’s arms. Hearing the baby noises, Michael’s head snapped around to face Annie. He took two steps back and stood beside them. Then methodically removed his sunglass, folded, and hung them in the collar of his shirt.
“How’s our new little girl?” he asked, bending down at the knee to be at their level.
“Who told you we had a girl?” she asked, her eyes meeting his.
“I called Taylor and she told me.”
Annie shook her head. “You were supposed to call my lawyer.”
He shrugged. “I thought that was too impersonal and I knew Taylor would have the same information.”
“Taylor never mentioned you called.”
“Because I asked her not to.”
A pause fell between them while Annie thought about his comments.
“So, you were the one that sent the pink and white roses and the teddy bear?” she asked, remembering the huge vase that had arrived with no note card.
He nodded and smiled. “Yes, that was me.”
“You shouldn’t have,” she answered with sarcasm, feeling the stress of his closeness.
Michael smiled broadly and offered the baby his index finger to grab. “I heard you called her Angel. I’m glad. Can I see her?” he asked, looking Annie directly in the eye.
For the first time she was hit with the intensity of his gaze. Annie’s mind stopped functioning. For several seconds, he held her with his eyes. Carefully, she folded the blanket back and revealed the baby to him.
“She’s beautiful, just like her mother,” he said, his eyes never leaving Annie.
She turned away sharply. He had no right to speak to her with such intimacy. “It’s incredible to think that something this beautiful could come from a period of time that was so ugly.”
“It wasn’t all bad, Annie,” he began then wiped off the sweat from his palms across his thighs. “There were times when it was so good it was perfection and then I fucked up. I’ve never had a problem admitting that and I also paid heavily for my mistakes. If there was a way I could take it all back, I would.”