He gives me a lazy, satiated smile, and shakes his head slowly. “Never.”
Chapter Three
Morgan eyes me skeptically as she holds up the bodysuit. “Are you sure about this?”
I chew on my thumbnail as I examine the garment. Now that it’s out of the package it looks even smaller than I imagined. “I think I’m sure.”
She waves the spandex suit at me. “This looks like supermodel sized…not…”
I wag my finger at her. “Don’t call me chubby or there will be consequences.”
“Nah, I was going to say real-woman-sized, Brooke. I swear.”
“Thank you for that. But there’s got to be a way to get this on, right? I mean they wouldn’t be selling so many otherwise.”
Morgan shrugs. “I guess so. How should we start?”
“I’m thinking the first part should be easy, like putting on a pair of tights.”
“Okaaaay,” Morgan says as she tries to pull the opening at the top of the garment open wider. Right now it’s the size of doughnut. I could use a doughnut about now, but that’s what got me into this mess in the first place.
I start to untie my robe and Morgan holds up her hand. “Wait a minute, tell me you’re wearing underwear because I’m pretty sure my job description as your assistant doesn’t involve me touching you when you’re naked. The goods need to be covered.”
“You’re so uptight.”
“Says the woman wearing a body stocking to conceal her real curves.”
I smile at her. You can’t out-tease Morgan. Ever.
“Actually I thought ahead about this. So to answer your question, no, I’m not wearing underwear. I’m pretty sure that my body, or at the very least my girly parts would suffocate if I did, and no stinking Halloween party is worth that risk. But I’m happy to report that I thought ahead about this issue.”
I ceremoniously untie and pull off my robe while Morgan covers her eyes squealing. “I’m wearing a string bikini.”
She parts her fingers and lets out a long sigh before dropping her hands.
I wiggle the strings at my hips. “See when we pull the thing up past my girly parts I can untie this and pull it off.”
“That works for me.” She glances at the clock on the nightstand. “We better get started.”
I sit on the edge of the bed, take the first leg of the thing and grab my way down to the foot part before wedging my foot inside. I hold my leg up and rotate my ankle in victory. “Yay!”
Morgan scratches her head. “Why do you need skinny feet?”
I shake my head. “I think they do this to keep it from riding up your legs. Thus the tagline…sleek from head to toe.”
“Okay then, as long as we’re on a roll let’s move on to foot two.”
The second foot goes on easily as well. “Maybe this won’t be so hard after all.”
Morgan rolls her eyes before dropping to her knees to help me yank the thing up my calves. When we get all the way up to my knees I feel a surge of optimism until I realize that the crotch for the bodysuit is at my knees as well. This would be great if I were three feet tall with stumpy legs, but that’s not the case.
To add to my frustration, my thighs are pressed so tightly together from the spandex binding that I’m losing feeling in my hoo-hah.
Thank God Morgan has a determined spirit because she goes at it like a champ, pinching bits of the slick fabric and yanking upwards. I don’t even cry out when she pinches some of my skin as well since I don’t want her to lose her focus.
I look down at her as we work together. Her face is red and her brow damp with perspiration. We’re getting close to our goal of a crotch-to-crotch connection when after a particularly tough yank she tumbles backward on the floor.
“Holy hell, this is worse than Chinese foot-binding. It’s full-body binding!”
I nod in agreement. “Obviously a man who hated women designed this.”
“Or a really skinny girl who never has to wear it.”
“To hell with them all,” I pronounce as I wiggle my toes, hoping to regain feeling in them. I look over at Morgan still sprawled on the floor. She appears to be breathing normally now. I study her red costume that shows off her figure in a very flattering way.
“Hey, I’ve been meaning to ask. Who are you dressed as?”
“Electra. Girl, you need to study up on your Superheroes!”
I sigh. “I know. So many Superheroes, so little time. That’s one sexy outfit. You look awesome.”
“Thanks. And lucky for you Electra is a ninja…cause it’s going to take ninja skills to finish this job.”
We get back to work and after a tugging session equivalent to a full upper body, gym workout we get the thing over the edge of where my ass starts. I take a moment to untie the bikini and yank it out giving myself the equivalent of a pussy burn. I wince in pain. Morgan suddenly goes pale. “What?” I ask.
“How will you go to the bathroom once this thing is fully on?”
“There’s a hole built into the crotch. Didn’t you notice it?”
“I’ve been trying not to notice the crotch. Remember? Well at least that’s one thing you don’t have to worry about — a pee hole. Wow! They really thought of everything, didn’t they?”
She moves to my right hip while I work on my left but after several minutes we’ve succeeded in only getting the damn thing up another inch. She looks down at me and giggles.
“What?”
She pokes at the overspill. “This gives new meaning to muffin top.”
“That’s lovely, thank you.”
Morgan pokes me again. “Well, you’ve got to admit…”
“Can we move on?”
We tug some more before she stops and throws her hands up in the air. “Are you sure you got the right size here?”
“I swear!” I say, my humiliation reaching new heights.
“It’s your hips,” she says shaking her head. “We’re going to need reinforcement.”
I drop my head and moan. “Billie. Go find Billie. She’s the strongest woman I know.”
“Is she here yet?”
“Yeah, she should be in the kitchen. Last time I looked she was hot-gluing plastic spiders to the radioactive punch glasses.”
When Morgan slips out of the bedroom I fall back on the bed and pull the robe over my body that now resembles a sausage whose casing has come undone. I tip my head up and look down at my legs. They’re unrecognizable. I tap my finger over my thighs and marvel. They’ve never felt so firm.
I hear a soft knock on the door and Nathan sticks his head inside. I pull my robe all the way up until it’s tucked under my chin. He frowns and his eyes cloud over with a look of concern. “Why are you in bed, sweetheart? Is something wrong?”
I feel my cheeks get hot. “No, nothing’s wrong. Just a bit of a costume challenge. Morgan’s getting Billie to help. Did you finish the Iron Man thing?”
He ignores my question. “Costume challenge?”
Suddenly Billie and Morgan burst into the room. Morgan’s eyes light up. “Oh good, Nathan can help too!”
I shake my head wildly at her.
“Help with what?”
“Getting her bodysuit on,” Morgan says.
I make a face at her.
Nathan’s expression shifts to one of horror as he walks to the edge of the bed and peers down at me. “It takes three people to get on your body suit?”
“Four if you count Brooke,” Morgan adds.
Thank you so much, Morgan.
I give Nathan the sweetest smile I can muster under the circumstances. “No handsome, we’re fine. You go on and do your Superhero thing.”
He looks relieved as he nods and walks to the door. “Good luck, girls.”
When the door closes Billie, who looks fierce in her Harley Quinn bodysuit, pushes her hands down over her hips. “So what’s this nonsense about you buying a bodysuit three sizes too small?”