“That’s okay,” said Kaitlyn looking ahead. “Unless you want me to sleep in here. It’s up to you.”
“You can sleep in here,” said Sam.
“Okay,” said Kaitlyn.
“I’m going to use the bathroom,” said Sam. “Do you want to use the bathroom?” Kaitlyn shook her head no. Sam washed his face and peed and went in his room. Kaitlyn was sitting on the mattress staring at the floor. “What are you doing?” said Sam laughing. Kaitlyn grinned and said she was drunk and laid down on the mattress. Sam jumped on the mattress. He sat on the mattress. He lay on the mattress. He took stuffed animals and put them around him and Kaitlyn. He said his ex-girlfriend Sheila made them.
“What’s this one?” said Kaitlyn.
Sam said it was a hamster.
“No it isn’t, what’s this,” said Kaitlyn holding things which came out of the hamster’s head. Sam said “antlers” and threw the stuffed animals at the ceiling and they fell on him and Kaitlyn. Sam asked Kaitlyn to turn off the light. Kaitlyn turned off the light. Sam held an Eeyore stuffed animal above him and said Eeyore’s problem was that his tail fell off.
“That’s sad,” said Kaitlyn. “It’s not true.”
“What?” said Sam grinning.
“Do you snore?” he said.
“I don’t snore,” said Kaitlyn.
“What if I snore?” said Sam.
Kaitlyn said she would elbow him.
“What if I say ‘Eeyore, Eeyore’ when I’m asleep?” said Sam.
Kaitlyn said she would elbow him a lot. “Eeyore smells like coconut oil,” she said. “Everything here smells like coconut oil,” said Sam. “I rub it on myself then roll around in bed.” He put his arm under the back of Kaitlyn’s neck and she turned toward him putting her arm across his chest. They lay quietly without moving. Some light came in the window.
“I saw Sheila on the street today,” said Sam. “It was really awkward. She was with her friend and she came toward me and I thought she was going to stop to talk to me but then only her friend stood in front of me and she was walking away and her friend said ‘hi, I’m Gerard.’ I said ‘hi, I’m Sam.’ Then I said ‘good night’ and went in the subway.”
“Gerard,” said Kaitlyn. “Was it her new boyfriend?”
“I don’t think so,” said Sam. “No, just a friend, I think. Yeah, just a friend.”
“Do you still like her?”
“I don’t know,” said Sam.
“But you still love the things she made you, right?”
“Yeah,” said Sam.
“Then why don’t you like her anymore?”
“I don’t know,” said Sam. “I do like her.”
They were quiet for about a minute.
“Why was she mean to you today?” said Kaitlyn in a confused voice.
“I don’t know,” said Sam. “She wasn’t.”
They were quiet for a few minutes.
“I’m going to sleep now,” said Kaitlyn.
“Okay,” said Sam and rolled over facing a wall. “Good night.”
“Good night,” said Kaitlyn.
The next week Paula and Sam played Scrabble in her apartment then watched a Scrabble documentary on her computer. A Scrabble player had sex with a prostitute in Mexico during a tournament in San Diego. Paula and Sam went to her room and sat on her bed. They kissed and Paula began to move around a lot. Paula was scratching Sam’s back. Sam thought “voracious” and felt confused. Paula crawled on the bed and gave Sam a condom and Sam put it on.
“I don’t like condoms,” he said kneeling on the bed.
“What should I do?” said Paula. “What do you want me to do?”
“Nothing. It’s okay.”
“I’m sorry,” said Paula.
“Don’t worry,” said Sam.
“Okay,” said Paula.
They went to sleep and woke around 8 a.m. and ate leftover bread from the organic vegan restaurant where they worked. Paula put kimchee and vegan mayonnaise on her bread. Sam had read about her doing that on her blog. Sam asked if he could put Paula’s agave nectar on his bread. Paula said he could. Sam ate two pieces of bread. At her front door they hugged and Sam thought about one night at work when Paula stared at a wall at the back of the kitchen while eating rice pudding. Sam had walked to her and asked what she was doing. She had turned around with a shy facial expression and Sam had grinned at her for a few seconds. Sam liked shy facial expressions. “I feel good hugging Paula,” he thought.
On Hester’s sofa in her apartment in Chelsea Sam said he had sort of been seeing someone named Paula for a few weeks but didn’t think they would see each other anymore. Hester asked why and Sam said he didn’t know. Hester asked again and Sam said he didn’t know. Hester said she needed to pee and went to the bathroom and came back and sat on Sam’s lap and began to kiss him. Sam tasted mouthwash. Hester stood and walked around and said she shouldn’t be doing that. She said Sam was too young. She sat on Sam’s lap and they kissed and she stood and walked around.
“I’m one year younger than you,” said Sam. “You aren’t making sense.”
“I’m not going to have sex with you,” said Hester standing near her front door, almost out of view. “Should we go buy cigarettes and condoms?” she said not looking at Sam. “I’m out of cigarettes. I haven’t had sex in so long.”
“I don’t know,” said Sam after a few seconds.
“Why don’t you want to have sex with me?” said Hester.
“What do you mean,” said Sam.
“I don’t know,” said Hester quickly.
“I don’t … not don’t want to have sex with you,” said Sam.
About a week later they were on Hester’s sofa watching child prodigies on YouTube. They watched a video called “don’t hate me because i’m a child prodigy.” They began to drink wine. They lay stomach-down on her bed. Hester said she was engaged to a poet in Kansas when she was twenty and then ran away and the poet cried in a basement. Sam asked questions about the poet and Hester talked for about an hour. Sam felt very emotional thinking about the poet. Hester asked Sam if he wanted to go to an event where Moby was DJ-ing.
“Yes,” said Sam. “Will you hang out with Moby?”
“I usually sit in a room downstairs talking to Brandon,” said Hester.
“That sounds good. I’ll just sit by you and look at things.”
“Brandon is friends with Moby or something,” said Hester. “They talk on AIM like every day. Brandon is great. I love him. He can get really jealous though.” Hester said one time Brandon saw her kissing someone and then went upstairs and threw a chair and broke a table and banned her from a lot of New York City clubs for a few months. “I’ve told him I’m not interested in him like that, and I’ve never even kissed him or anything,” said Hester. “So he really doesn’t have any reason to act like that. I don’t understand.”
“He just likes you a lot,” said Sam. “I’m afraid.”
The next week Sam went to Hester’s apartment at night and lay on her sofa. He said he went to an organic vegan muffin store earlier with Robert. He said he liked Robert. “I should probably get dressed,” said Hester and walked away and walked back wearing tights under her dress. She stared at edamame that Sam was eating from a bowl. They went outside and got in a cab. At the club they walked to the front of the line and a person let them in. “Who was that, did you know them,” said Sam. “No,” said Hester. “Oh, good,” said Sam. They got drinks and walked into a garage area with Brandon. Sam said it smelled like fish in the garage. Sam drank all of his vodka and grapefruit juice. “Sam, you drank that really fast,” said Hester. “It didn’t seem to have any alcohol in it,” said Sam and stared at things while Brandon and Hester talked to each other.