Early photos of Wade’s father show him in military uniform. He was handsome and reserved with small metal-rimmed glasses. He projected the image of a chemist. Wade’s grandfather on his father’s side was a shopkeeper who grew up in Kansas. For some never-explained reason they moved to east Texas. Soon after moving they got caught in the drought and windstorms that plagued the area, forcing them to relocate again. This time they moved to New Orleans. At the time of the move Wade’s father was four years old. Wade’s paternal grandfather died before Wade got to meet him. Wade was told that his grandfather was much in temperament like his father.
Wade’s mother was half Irish and half Cajun. She was brought up in the tough Irish channel neighborhood of New Orleans, in a middle-class family of public servants. Wade’s great-grandparents had migrated to the U.S. from Ireland to escape the potato famine at the turn of the century. Wade’s Irish grandmother met and married a Cajun rice farmer and had eight children. Wade hardly knew his grandfather on his mother side, as he died from Tuberculosis when Wade was six. Four of his mother’s siblings died young at different ages, leaving Wade’s mother and three sisters alone to support themselves as youngsters growing up in New Orleans.
Wade’s parents met in the early '30s at a social dance. A frequent family story was they danced to Tommy and Jimmy Dorsey bands one night and the Leo Soileau Cajun band the next night. Family photographs of the era showed Wade’s mother as being very beautiful; slender in fashionable dresses of the time, which reaffirmed her status as a social butterfly.
However, Wade’s mother could be hell on wheels. She had both an Irish temperament and a drinking problem. Most days she started drinking mid-morning and didn’t stop until she went to bed.
She was hard on the kids. Beatings were common and included heavy doses of yelling and verbal abuse. In public, the kids were often embarrassed and spoken down to. The verbal abuse took place in front of teachers, their friends, other family members, and even in public restaurants where plenty of other adults could easily hear. Wade’s mother was moody, and none of the kids dared to confront her at the wrong time with an unsolved problem. Her expectations were even higher than Wade’s father’s, and failure was not approved or tolerated in her house. A low test score in school, loss in a track meet, or an impolite gesture or oversight, such as forgetting to open the car door for a lady, quickly brought her verbal wrath and scorn. Any behavior considered worse would bring out the belt and lashings.
Wade had a memory of a family party at an aunt’s house during the Christmas holidays when he was around ten years old. Other cousins had arrived and presents were being stacked high around the Christmas tree for later distribution. His mother had been drinking heavily and was having a discussion with one of Wade’s uncles. Voices were suddenly raised and a few loud curse words were exchanged. All of a sudden his mother punched his uncle in the face, knocking him down and almost unconscious, breaking his nose. The party came to complete stop as his uncle fell to the floor. Wade’s mother stood over him still cursing and yelling. Two older cousins stepped in and restrained her as his uncle got to a nearby dining room chair. Another aunt brought a napkin wrapped in ice for his uncle’s nose. After recovering for a little while he said to his wife, “Get the kids and let’s go.” Asked if he was okay, he replied, “I’m fine but I don’t need to be around that bitch any longer.” Overhearing the comment, Wade’s mother came charging out of her chair saying, “Who are you calling a bitch? Get the hell out of here.” Wade’s uncle soon left with his wife and kids, holding ice on his nose. He gave quiet thanks to Wade’s aunt for hosting the party.
Wade’s father, embarrassed by the incident, said to Wade’s mother, “Maybe we should go as well.” Wade’s mother sat up in her chair, a fresh drink in her hand, and replied loudly, “I’m not going anywhere. They need to go. I’ve just started to enjoy myself.” As family members began to re-gather it became obvious that nobody wanted to be around Wade’s mother and she finally wandered over and sat down by herself in an overstuffed chair — with another drink in her hand. She had not only exhibited distasteful drunken behavior, but she had certainly set a wrong example for at least 15 cousins from ages 3-12 years old, who witnessed the entire event. Wade’s mother eventually passed out in the chair, and Wade’s father and an aunt went over and propped her up and then managed to get her to the car in her drunken stupor. Wade and his younger sister sat in the back seat and said nothing on the way home. When Wade’s father pulled into the driveway of their house, he told Wade’s sister to go open the side door. He said to Wade, “Help me get your mother upstairs”.
While punching another family member was a somewhat unusual event for Wade’s mother, her drunken public state and arrogant attitude were not. As Wade grew older and stronger and his father physically weaker, Wade was often told to get his mother from the car and bring her upstairs on his own. Wade would always stay awake for a while after getting his mother in bed to make sure she was asleep. He did so because on several occasions just after he had drifted to sleep, his door would fly open. In the middle of the doorway would be his mother with a belt in her hand, energized by a second wind. She would enter his bedroom, yelling wildly, and would start beating him. Sometimes she would pass out from exhaustion on the floor next to his bed. After she finished beating him, he would get her back into her bed in the next room before going back to sleep. His father would normally be fast asleep while all this took place.
4
Perhaps not surprisingly, discipline problems at school began to emerge early for Wade. His parents enrolled him in a private Catholic grammar school starting in the second grade. Holy Angels School was located just two blocks from his home. The school was run by the Sisters of the Blessed Word, offering education to boys and girls from grades two through six. Wade could walk the two blocks to and from school from his house without the assistance of his parents when he was old enough. His house and school were on the same side of the street, which had little traffic. This was a real benefit to his parents.
Located in a suburban upper-middle-class neighborhood of New Orleans, Holy Angels was highly regarded. It had the reputation of a no-nonsense, strict-discipline institution providing a good Catholic education. Like many institutions in the city, Holy Angels had its own legacy. Parents of many of the neighborhood students attended Holy Angels when they were children.
The school taught both boys and girls, although they were separated in all classrooms and recreational activities by a long and wide tiled hallway. At the end of this center hallway stood the principal and administrative offices. The ground floor on the both sides of the hallway was used for assembly, lunch, and restrooms, with stairs in the corner leading upstairs to the second floor with its separate boys and girls classrooms. Basketball courts were just outside the assembly room on the bottom floor.
The sisters were quick to teach school rules and students immediately learned that punishment would be swift if there was a violation of those rules. There seemed to be rules for everything. The punishment for violating them could be anything from having to write prescribed sentences several hundred times without a mistake, or being ridiculed in front of classmates, to being put in a dark cloak closet with the door closed. And then there were the beatings with a ruler or yardstick. Yardsticks were a quarter inch thick and were made of hard maple or oak But the worst punishment was being sent to see the principal, who called students’ parents and who would suspend any who did not change their behavior.