Summer cruised into the medical bay and went to the first table, where Sergeant Barkley lay on his side. The blonde mutt lifted his head to greet her and wagged his tail.
Summer couldn’t hold back a smile as she rubbed his neck with both hands, then leaned in and kissed him on the forehead. “Look at you. Someone’s getting better already.”
“I’m always amazed at how fast animals recover,” Liz said, leaving her worktable and walking to Summer.
“That’s because they don’t know how to wallow in self-pity and beg for sympathy, like us humans. They are only focused on one thing, getting back to normal. All that other stuff is a waste of energy.”
“That’s true. Never thought of it that way.”
Summer rubbed him a few more times, then turned her head away in a flash. “Phew, somebody really needs a bath!”
“As soon as he’s able to walk on his own, but you’ll need to keep that dressing clean.”
“I can do that,” Summer said, leaving the dog’s side to walk to the empty table next to him. She put her hand on the cool metal surface, leaving it there for a three-count.
Liz followed her and put a soft hand on Summer’s back. “Stuart’s down on seven, being prepped.”
“Do we really have to cremate him?”
“It’s what he wanted.”
“Still, maybe we should bury him next to June by that old tree in town. I’m sure that would be okay.”
“No, Summer. It’s important that we abide by his wishes. Stuart would’ve never wanted us to expose our numbers or our location, simply to put him to rest. It’s too big a risk.”
“I get that, but it just feels wrong, that’s all. He should be with June.”
“Any idea when you want to have the service?”
Summer paused, waiting until the twinge in her heart faded. “I suppose the sooner the better. Everyone needs closure.”
“I’ll make the arrangements,” Liz said, wrapping Summer in a hug and squeezing.
Summer returned the favor, using her arms to send back her half of the embrace, only much harder. “I know you miss him, too. I’m so sorry.”
Liz pulled back and let go, her face wet with tears. “We all miss him, sweetheart, but these things happen. What’s important now is that we never forget him or what he stood for. He’d want us to carry on in his name.”
“And June’s.”
Liz moved her hands to Summer’s elbows, holding gently like a mother would do in support. “Of course. She was his rock.”
“And he was mine.”
“I hope you know Stuart saved a special place in his heart, one that was only meant for you. I know that for a fact. He loved you, Summer. Never forget that.”
“I won’t,” Summer said, feeling a stream of tears leak from her eyes. “It’s just hard. I miss him so much. I keep expecting to see his great big smile around the next corner, but then I remember what happened. It breaks my heart every time.”
“Just be strong and finish what he started. That’s all anyone can ask. You’ll find your way through it. We all will.”
“I’ll try.”
“Unfortunately, there will be some who don’t think you’re ready.”
“Yeah, I’m one of them. But Krista said she’d help.”
“She did?”
Summer shrugged. “I’m as surprised as you. I thought she hated my guts.”
“She did have her moments, that’s for sure.”
“Not that I could blame her. I did go out of my way to piss her off sometimes.”
“People can change, Summer. On all sides. And it’s never too late to do so.”
“Yeah, I’m starting to learn that,” Summer said, not wanting to ask the next question. But it was time. “Krista said you wanted to talk to me about something?”
Liz pointed to the rolling stool in the corner. “Why don’t you have a seat?”
“I don’t know if I like the sound of that.”
“Please, Summer. It’s important.”
“Okay,” Summer replied, walking with heavy feet to the chair and pulling it away from the wall. She sucked in a deep breath and sat down, feeling the twinge in her chest return, only this time it was deeper and more profound than before.
Something bad was coming and it was making her dizzy in the process. Just then, the air in the room seemed to disappear, making it hard to breathe.
She bent over, resting her elbows on her knees, giving herself time to work more oxygen into her body. It took a dozen or so breaths, but the lightheadedness finally went away.
Summer looked up to find Liz leaning against the worktable, with her butt pressing against the edge. Her fingers were laced together and resting against her thighs, just below the bottom of her medical smock.
The look on Liz’s face was one Summer hadn’t seen before. Withdrawn. Red. Numb-looking. Her eyes more round than normal.
Summer gulped and sat upright, then wriggled her butt to the left, finding the exact center of the stool for balance. Not that it mattered in the least, but it felt like the right thing to do.
Liz raised one eyebrow before she spoke. “Have you heard anything about Alexander?”
“No, should I have?”
“Wasn’t sure if someone might have told you.”
“I haven’t heard anything. Is something wrong?”
Liz took a few seconds to respond. “He’s sick, Summer.”
“What do you mean sick?”
“He’s very sick, Summer. The kind of sick that I can’t treat.”
When those words landed on her ears, Summer closed her eyes as she felt the energy drain from her body, almost as if someone had just pulled the drain plug.
Summer grabbed the edges of the stool to keep herself upright as a vision of Morse’s gentle face flashed in her mind, his smile aimed at her from his walker, while standing in front of one of the chalkboards in his office—the same board with the strange calculations on it, written in red.
She’d been too busy to notice that he hadn’t been around since they’d gotten back. She should have known something was wrong. He always seemed to go out of his way to greet her after one of her missions. Somehow. Somewhere. But he hadn’t. They were more than close. Best friends, actually, and best friends know when something is wrong. It’s part of the connection you share. You just know. And yet, she didn’t. She’d been too per-occupied with her own shit—selfish shit.
Summer took another moment to collect herself, allowing some of her strength to return. She opened her eyes and aimed them at Liz. “He’s dying, isn’t he?”
“I’m afraid so.”
Summer couldn’t hold back the tears. They came all at once, flooding from her eyes as if a dam had broken.
Liz came to her side, knelt down, and wrapped her in a hug. “Just let it out, dear. It’s okay.”
Summer melted into her arms, her body falling limp as she lost all control.
Liz held her upright as Summer cried into her shoulder, each burst followed by spasms from her stomach and chest, pushing out air and tears together in uncontrollable heaves.
Summer felt Liz’s hand on the side of her hair, stroking it gently as she began to rock the two of them from side to side, keeping Summer close to her chest.
“Shhhh. It’ll be okay, honey,” Liz said.
The tears and pain continued for another minute, but somehow Summer fought through them and found a way to regain her voice. The words were choppy, but her tongue was able to set them free. “Is it something with his legs?”
“No, honey. It’s cancer. He’s had it for a while now.”
“Cancer?” Summer replied, letting the word soak in and find meaning. “Why didn’t somebody tell me?”
“He didn’t want anyone to know. I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you before.”
Summer couldn’t believe what was happening. First Edison and now Morse. “What kind of cancer?”
“Pancreatic. But it spread to his spine a few months ago.”