"None of that matters," he says, releasing my hand and fiddling with his mirrors, anything to avoid looking at me. "All that matters is now.”
"Yeah, but Damen —" I start, wanting to explain that it's not just curiosity I'm after, but a closeness, a bond, wishing he'd trust me with those long-ago secrets. But when I look at him again, I know better than to press.
Besides, maybe it's time I extend a little trust too.
"I was thinking ..." I say, my fingers fiddling with the hem on my shirt.
He looks at me, his hand on the clutch, ready to shift into reverse.
"Why don't you go ahead and make that reservation."
I nod, my lips pressed together, my gaze focused on his. "You know, for the Montage or the Ritz?" I add, holding my breath as his beautiful dark eyes graze over my face.
"You sure?"
I nod. Knowing I am. We've been waiting for this moment for hundreds of years, so why delay any longer? "More than sure," I say, my eyes meeting his.
He smiles, his face lighting up for the first time all day. And I'm so relieved to see him looking normal again after that strange behavior from before —his remoteness at school, his inability to make the portal appear, his not feeling well —all of it so unlike the Damen I know. He's always so strong, sexy, beautiful, and invincible—immune to weak moments and bad days. And seeing him vulnerable like that has left me far more shaken than I care to admit. "Consider it done," he says, filling my arms with dozens of manifested red tulips before speeding away.
CHAPTER 8
The next morning when I meet Damen in the parking lot, all my worries disappear. Because the moment he opens my door and helps me out of my car, I notice how healthy he looks, how devastatingly handsome he is, and when I look in his eyes, it's clear that all of yesterday's weirdness is over. We are more in love than ever.
Seriously. All through English he can barely keep his hands off of me. Constantly leaning toward my desk and whispering into my ear, much to Mr. Robins's annoyance, and Stacia and Honor's disgust. And now that we're at lunch, he hasn't let up a bit, stroking my cheek and gazing into my eyes, pausing only to take the occasional sip of his drink before picking up right where he left off, murmuring sweet nothings into my ear.
Usually when he acts like that, it's partly out of love, and partly to tone down all of the noise and energy —all of the random sights, sounds, and colors that constantly bombard me. Ever since I broke the psychic shield I'd made a few months back, a shield that shut everything out and made me as clueless as I was before I died and came back psychic, I've yet to find a way to replace it that will allow me to channel the energies I want while blocking the energies I don't want. And since Damen's never struggled with this, he's not sure how to teach me. But now that he's back in my life, it no longer seems all that urgent, because the mere sound of his voice can silence the world, while the touch of his skin makes my whole body tingle. And when I look in his eyes, well, let's just say that I'm instantly overcome by this warm, wonderful, magnetic pull—like it's just him and I and everything else has ceased to exist. Damen's like my perfect psychic shield. My ultimate other half. And even when we can't be together, the telepathic thoughts and images he sends provide that same calming effect.
But today, all of those sweet murmurings aren't just to shield me —they're mostly about our upcoming plans.
The suite he booked at the Montage Resort. And how he's yearned so long for this night.
"Do you have any idea what it's like to wait for something for four hundred years?" he whispers, his lips nipping at the curve of my ear.
"Four hundred? I thought you've been around for six hundred?" I say, pulling away to get a better view of his face.
"Unfortunately a couple of centuries had to pass before I found you," he whispers, his mouth making its way from my neck to my ear. "Two very lonely centuries, I might add."
I swallow hard. Knowing the loneliness he refers to does not necessarily mean he was alone. In fact, quite the contrary. But still, I don't call him on it. In fact, I don't say a word. I'm committed to moving past all of that, getting over my insecurities and moving forward. Just like I promised I would.
I refuse to think about how he spent those first two hundred years without me.
Or how he spent the next four hundred getting over the fact that he'd lost me.
Nor will I even begin to consider the six-hundred-year head start he has on studying and practicing the —um—sensual arts.
And I will absolutely, positively, not dwell on all of the beautiful, worldly, experienced women he knew over the span of those years.
Nope.
Not me.
I refuse to even go there.
"Shall I pick you up at six?" he asks, gathering my hair at my nape and twisting it into a long blond rope. "We can go to dinner first."
"Except we don't really eat," I remind him.
"All, yes. Good point." He smiles, releasing my hair so that it flows back around my shoulders and drops down to my waist. "Though I'm sure we can find something else to occupy our time?"
I smile, having already told Sabine that I'm staying at Haven's and hoping she doesn't try to follow up. She used to be so good about taking me at my word, but ever since I was caught drinking, got suspended, and basically stopped eating, she's been prone to following through.
"Are you sure you're okay with all this?" Damen asks, misreading the look on my face as indecision, when it's really just nerves.
I smile and lean in to kiss him, eager to erase any lingering doubts (mine more than his), just as Miles tosses his bag on the table and says, "Oh, Haven, look!
They're back. The lovebirds have returned!"
I pull away, my face flushing with embarrassment as Haven laughs and sits down beside him, her eyes scanning the tables as she says, "Where's Roman? Anyone seen him?"
"He was in homeroom." Miles shrugs, removing the top from his yogurt and hunching over his script.
And he was in history, I think, remembering how I ignored him all through class, despite his numerous attempts to get my attention, and how after the bell rang, I hung back, pretending to look for something in my bag. Preferring the weight of Mr. Munoz's penetrating stare and his conflicted thoughts about me (my good grades versus my undeniable weirdness) to dealing with Roman.
Haven shrugs and opens her cupcake box, sighing when she says, "Well, it was nice while it lasted." "What're you talking about?" Miles looks up as she points straight ahead, her lips twisted to the side, her eyes completely dejected, as we all follow her finger, all the way to where Roman is talking and laughing with Stacia, Honor, Craig, and the rest of the A-list crew. "Big deal." He shrugs. "You just wait, he'll be back."
"You don't know that," Haven says, shedding the skirt from her red velvet cupcake, her gaze still focused on Roman.
"Please. We've seen it a million times before. Every new kid with the slightest potential for cool has ended up at that table at some point. Only the truly cool never last long —because the truly cool end up here." He laughs, tapping the yellow fiberglass table with the tips of his bright pink nails.
"Not me," I say, eager to steer the conversation away from Roman, knowing I'm the only one who's happy to see he's abandoned us for a much cooler crowd. "I started out here from the very first day," I remind them.